Do I invite my sister?

She frequently lies about pretty much everything she does and no one actually knows what's going on with her. My one sister has frequently reached out to her and asked to meet up for lunch, again offering to come get her, only to get stood up every single time. She has lied about where she works, she has created people on Facebook to be her friends, she has several kids that she doesn't have custody of and she lies and says she does. My sister who is my MOH is now pregnant, this sister found out and now says she's pregnant too (she has lied about several pregnancies before and even faked a miscarriage so her pregnancy lie could end since she had no signs and people were starting to question her). I have tried to talk to her several times about her life and what's going on, genuinely caring since she's my sister, only to get attacked. She says things to me like "no wonder mom doesn't want you in her life" I haven't spoke to my mom in 10 years and she is the only one of the 4 of us that has a relationship with her.

My sister and my dad have both told me it's a call I need to make. But I can't seem to do it. On one hand it's my sister and I would feel horrible if the roles were reversed and I was excluded from such an event. But at the same time, she's been nothing but distant and abusive and I don't really think she deserves to be there.

My brother and I have a simular relationship. I invited him but wouldn't be shocked if he didn't shoe up. At the end of the day I figured it was only right for me to invite him.

That's exactly what my other sister said. But if I don't invite her I'll get attacked for it. But if I do invite her and she says she's coming, which she won't, I'm going to eat the cost of her plate knowing full well she never intended to come.

Your day will be stressful enough without her added drama. I'd say pass on it.

Personally I would not invite anyone to my wedding that I think will cause drama or stress me out in any kind of way. Regardless of who they are. I'm leaving out several family members for this exact reason. That's not the energy we want on one of the biggest days of our lives. However in your case, you said she never shows anyway so just invite her to spare your own feelings and if she doesnt show thats on her.

I would invite her. If she doesn't show then she doesn't show up.

Sister or not, I'd never invite someone like that to my wedding. Just because y'all are blood doesn't excuse her shitty, abusive behavior and complete lack of effort to be in your life. You've extended the olive branch many, many times. You've put in more than your fair share of effort; I'd be over it at this point. I don't think you need to invite her.

ETA: Words

I wouldn't invite her.. with my own crazy family history I have decided not to include two of my three siblings because it is my day and I want it to be drama and stress free. Do what makes you happy on your day!

I have a similar relationship with my sister. Won't go into the details but we have barely spoken more than a sentence or two to each other in years. I agonized over whether or not I should invite her to the wedding. In the end I decided to take the high road. She didn't end up coming anyway, but at least she couldn't say she wasn't given the opportunity to. It's a tough decision and I feel for you!

I have a (ex?) friend that I have gone back and forth on inviting and right now I am leaning toward not simply because I don't believe she supports my relationship with my FH, nor do I think she'd be happy to be there.

It's definitely up to you, in the end, but if you think she might show up and be supportive and happy for you, invite her. If you think she might show up and cause chaos, you have every right to avoid that by not inviting her. Weddings are about celebrating a marriage, and I personally can't see myself inviting someone who isn't going to participate in my celebration in a positive way.

Soubds like my sister i have nothing to do with now. I will not be inviting my sister no matter what anyone says. So i say do what you want. If you dont want her there dont invite her

I would invite her. She's your sister. Let her decide whether to come or not. If you have to eat the cost of her plate for a no-show, i think its a small price in comparison to the guilt you might feel for not inviting her. Since she makes such a big deal out of being excluded, you can be the bigger person and invite her, and then its on her to be a grown woman and RSVP and show up and be respectful on your big day. I would look into the security your venue offers in case (God-forbid) she makes a dramatic scene and you need to remove her.

@susan she would 100% act like she was coming with no intention of actually coming. She will make up some excuse last minute why she couldn't make it then say something like "you never wanted me there anyways"

I would invite her and take the high road, just be aware she might not attend and be prepared for that.

I'd send one..shes still family.. chances are she wont come. I sent an invite to my uncle (who we've had issues with as family for several years now) to be the bigger person and try to mend the relationship. Not only did he not attend-he didn't bother to open the invitation. He wrote 'return to sender' in big letters across the front and sent it back as a big F-you. I still don't regret sending it, and now know there wont be any further attempts to mend the relationship. not sending it is only going to harbor more hurt feelings in the future should you two ever have any sort of relationship.

In this situation I wouldn't. However I'm not one to extend an invitation to keep the peace, as I'm not inviting my mom to my wedding. So I'm biased.

I'm so sorry you are dealing with this

It's totally your call, but I think you're completely justified either way. She is not someone who is a part of your life, so it's fair to not invite her. However - it seems like the chances are incredibly high she won't attend even if she is invited, so you could gamble and send an invite .

I would invite her. Perhaps she won't show up, but at least you did your due diligence. Best of luck!

We left out a lot of toxic people (even family) from our guest list.

I think your wedding is a good time to accept that you won't have a relationship with her. Don't invite her to the wedding and stop inviting her to your family events.