What would you do? To invite or not.

This caused a huge rift between A and B. The three of them would get into physical fights. B would demand that C leave, but A refused. C even got pregnant at one point. It was a very toxic trio. Anyway. During one of their fights, A apparently began strangling B. He is now facing felony charge. He's also still dating C and moved her into the house after B left. It's just all a mess.

This is all to say that we have no idea whether to invite B to the wedding. On one hand, she's a sweet girl who could really use the support. And FH has known her for over a decade. But at the same time, do we want to risk them getting back together and have A show up to the wedding not invited? Our instinct is to include her, but we have reservations. Thoughts?

I would say invite her, don't invite the other two. But at the same time your wedding is not a time to "support" someone else.

I wouldn't invite any of them, personally. Because there's just too much chance for drama.

Eta: what are the chances the other one or two will show up? Idk... You have to weigh the risks/rewards with this one.

I would invite her with no 'plus guest'. If you've known her that long, she should know people at your wedding. Hopefully, if A hasn't been invited by you or as her plus one, he won't show.

Call Jerry Springer and ask him!

Seems like a shit show. I definitely would clarify that you are only inviting her and no plus 1. If she is a close friend, it shouldn't be hard to speak to her about this. Just be straightforward.

Invite B with no plus 1 or avoid the drama and just don't invite

Wow this is a crazy story. Since you have time I would wait and see how things go. Don't send a STD the several months from now you can see where the relationship is and the decide.

I personally wold not invite any of them either. This would be my time to be a friend from a distance. That situation sounds like bad vibes.

The three of them were sort of an oasis. She would know maybe one or two people there, but I'd like to offer her a plus one to bring a friend. I know she'd appreciate the opportunity to get out and socialize and have fun. Right now she's working 12+ hour days just to distract herself. I know it's not our responsibility to use our wedding to help her, but I'd feel rude not helping when I easily can.

As for the other two, they have no way of knowing when or where the wedding is, unless B tells them. We are not inviting them under any circumstances. While it's not a big concern that they would crash, I wouldn't put it past them if they put their minds to it.

I would give it some time and see how things are closer to the time when you have to send out invites. Right now, I would be inclined to say not to invite.

I would invite her, if the other two randomly show up then have someone escort them out.

Inviting her to your wedding isn't "support." Being a good friend and being there for her the other 364 days of the year is support. If you plan on doing the latter, I think inviting her would be a natural side effect. If your friend is going through a tough time I think your focus is on the wrong thing.

I'd definitely give it some time before deciding, and probably would go with inviting B only.

Your wedding isn't for a while. Table the invite and see how things go. You don't have to make this decision now. Be there for her as a friend and, if things remain fine, invite her in August/September.

Thanks guys for all of your advice. I'd like to clarify that my connection with B is that she's FH's ex-friend's soon-to-be ex-wife. And I only knew her for about a year before the rift. Neither FH nor I have ever spent time with B without A until last night. We're offering her support and want to work on growing our friendship, but it's not something that exists currently between her and FH let alone her and I.

Wait?! B knew about C and were ok with it? Like, this was a permissible threesome?

@OriginalKD - Yeah. Originally she would join them every once in a while, but she slowly became part of the relationship. B was afraid of "using" C, but her generosity kinda backfired. Either way, it didn't help with A's fidelity. Not only was he dating C behind B's back, but he made a tinder profile and cheated with dozen of women. B found out when she found a file a pictures on his computer of all the women he slept with.

Wow! That is quite dramatic. My two cents is that if you haven't been close then there is no reason to invite her. Kind of like the general acquaintance or coworker. You may be close, but not close enough to bridge the gap into significant familial moments such as the wedding. Kudos to you for even considering the thought.

You don't invite someone to your wedding because they need support or they are sweet. Your list should contain friends and family who you couldn't imagine celebrating without on that day. Just my opinion.