i hate sleeping in a bed with my Fh!

1. Separate bedding/blankets
2. Ear plugs

Welcome to your new normal. lol When sharing space you always have to account for someone else and what they like and try to make it work. We do this with the air conditioning. I'm always cold and he is always hot. Key word COMPROMISE! The suggestions here are good.

FH does all of this. Our solutions:

-Got a king bed (used to be a double)

- We now both have our own comforters.

- Told FH that if he goes to the bathroom at night, he needs to use his phone with the flashlight not turned on- just his screen. If he turns on the bathroom light, the door better be closed before it comes on. We now have a nightlight in the bathroom so the light doesn't ever turn on

-Any time he starts talking nonsense in his sleep, I record it and make fun of him for it the entire next day.

Even last night he couldn't sleep so he was messing around on his phone and the light was driving me nutty, so I got a sleeping eye mask to help with the light, but also told him to throw a shirt over my face or something before I strangle him one of these nights.

Welcome to being with a man lol you’ll get used to it

View Quoted Comment Ohhh noo I totally agree with desperate blankets lol.. my fiancé and I just started using one comforter when we moved into our new house in July .. for the 2 years before that we used to separate comforters and it worked perfectly for us haha

Pro tip: get two blankets/comforters.

we have two on the bed, one is mine (heavier) one is his ( lighter) no arguing/ no pulling back and forth. so much extra blanket to cuddle around with

View Quoted Comment Lol these made me laugh as my husband and I are the same way but he is the one snuggled up and i am the one with my feet’s out of the blanket.
Having two blankets is something normal.

Thank you all for the help!!! Maybe there is hope after all 😂😅
I’m definitely going to look into getting another blanket for myself. We’ll probably try to get a king bed soon, but since all of these covers and pillowcases and such were brand new wedding presents, I don’t want to discard them just yet! I’m thinking we’re moving out of our apartment next summer, so maybe we can upgrade then.
For the bathroom light, I actually have a sleep mask at home that I can put over my eyes. I’ve never worn it because I didn’t need it when sleeping by myself, but looks like I need it now! haha!
And last, I used to sleep with earplugs when I had noisy roommates junior year. Maybe I’ll do that again.
I’m so glad there are solutions for this problem of mine!!!

Hahaha, I love this. I am so sorry that you had such a hard night but... that is me, almost every night. LOL. I was basically single for more than 10 yrs before my Fiance and I got together so I was not just comfortable sleeping in bed alone, I LOVE IT. I love my Fiance but the second he crosses the middle of the bed or breathes or snores or moves... I am awake and I hate him, lol. We argue about who took more of the covers and who was snoring or who did this or that... all the time. We have been sleeping in the same bed for over 4yrs... I have just come to accept that this is just going to be a battle we have the rest of our lives. I honestly think the only way to fix it is to get a MUCH bigger bed, covers or sleep in separate beds (which is not an option).

So my FH and I don't have a problem sleeping in the same bed however based on what you described I had some suggestions that may be able to help.

1- blanket issue - few options: get a king comforter even though you have a queen so it is bigger or you can do what me and FH do, we have one comforter but he sleeps with his separate fuzzy blanket underneath and I sleep with my own so that if the comforter gets pulled by either one of us we still have our own blankets.

2- bathroom light - this is something that I personally experienced not even with FH doing it but with myself having to get up to go to the bathroom and blinding myself from the bright light - we got one of those little night lights in the bathroom that you plug into the outlet and there is a very dim light when it is dark (enough to see but without blinding you) but when the bathroom light is turned on the light turns off. It was like $10 at walmart (if that).

3 - noises - I personally can't sleep with extreme silence so I used to have to sleep with a box fan on to drown out any little squeaks or various noises through the night - well FH bought me a little sound machine for Xmas one year and it is by far the best! I bring it everywhere with me when we travel and it sounds like a fan so this may help if you both aren't used to sounds that each other makes.

I am sure you both will make it work! It will just be a little adjustment at first.

We sleep in a king bed
We each have our own blankets
He talks in his sleep at first i used to listen to him now i just sleep through im used to it lol
I actually dont sleep well if hes not there i sleep so much better when hes in bed
He started working nights and noe i sleep poorly

It's so funny...in my previous marriage, I could not stand for my ex to be touching me in bed. Like I literally slept on the edge of the king size bed because I didn't want him touching me. That should have been a red flag! We had separate blankets as well. He got a C-PAP machine to deal with the snoring. Once we separated, I needed a white noise machine because I was so used to the noise from the C-PAP.

With FH it is completely different. He is a cuddler. I remember the first couple times we slept together, I thought it would never work. He is hot blooded and he made me hot. He is a heavy breather (sometimes snores). He is the kind of guy that can fall asleep in less than a minute, which is the polar opposite of me. And would steal all the covers. But now, 5 years later, I can hardly sleep without him. I love that he loves to cuddle me. I love that he reaches out for me in the middle of the night and pulls me closer. I have gotten used to him getting up hours before me. Instead of getting mad at him making so much noise, I realize how grateful I am that I have a man who is willing to work so hard for our family. It was a lot of me changing my mindset. I know, that sounds so lame. But it was true.

Personally, I think it's something that everyone has to adjusts to. When I first started sharing a bed with my fiancé (at that time, boyfriend), I didn't really like it. His snoring kept me awake all night, too much tossing and turning, just a lot issues. I was afraid I'd never be able to sleep again if I were to share a bed with him every night. Now? I don't even hear the snoring (and I know it's still as bad as it was before), it doesn't bother me when he gets up, we sometimes still steal the blanket from each other but we've learned to share in our sleep I guess, and I really enjoy those moments I am awake for when he talks in his sleep because some of the stuff he says is ridiculous and hilarious. Took some getting used to, but now I can't sleep in an empty bed.

We sleep in a queen size bed with a king size comforter, so not too much trouble with stealing blankets. Also, something you might not figure out till winter is who likes it warmer or colder. FH is generally much colder than me, I'm usually the one throwing off the blankets. Last Christmas, I bought him this Toasty Toes heater, like an electric blanket that goes under the sheets at the foot of the bed. But I bought it in twin size, so it only heats his side of the bed. Best investment!

It took a long time for FH and I to get comfortable sleeping in the same bed. I toss and turn a lot and take a long time to fall asleep while he just sprawls out altogether. I also am a covers stealer, so we snuggle for a bit to get comfortable and then kind of take our half of the bed with our own blankets. Lots of people look at us funny when we say we don't share covers. A bigger bed after marriage is definitely a goal! We are tight for space right now but we manage. It gets better once you get used to it.

About 2 months before he moved into my condo I upgraded to a king sized bed. He had one at his apartment and we hated sleeping at my place because I had a queen. It made all the difference in the world. We also have our own blankets. We were always playing tug of war so when we moved in with each other he brought his blankets along and I use mine and he uses his. We also if we get up to go to the bathroom shut the door before turning on the light so we don't wake up the other person.

I will say though that when he was working 3rd shift I loved having the bed to myself. It took a bit when he changed shifts to get used to having to share again lol

I feel like this is an issue that is rarely talked about, but it's still an issue! People love their sleep and don't want to be woken up off and on every night. My FH and I both snore off and on, and my FH is a sleep talker and sleep walker on occasion. Add a 60 pound dog who loves to sleep horizontally between us and it has potential to be a mess, ha ha. Some things we have done to help:

1. We each sleep with our own blanket.

2. We actually swapped sides of the bed about a year and a half into our relationship, and for whatever reason this was a game changer for us. We've been sleeping better ever since.

3. A king-sized bed can be your friend...plenty of room for everyone!

4. If either of us is snoring, we've learned the be polite about it. We can usually just tell each other to roll over and change position and that seems to help.

I would definitely start saving for a king size bed or a California king. And put multiple blankets on the bed. We have a king and it has anywhere from 2 blankets in the summer to 4 or more in the winter. I love for the room to be pretty chilly so I can curl up in my cozy blankets, but I am the blanket stealer and leave him freezing! So multiple blankets is a must. As for the noise thing, maybe a white noise machine? I know that when we aren't at home, I can definitely hear my FH when he breathes heavy or vice versa. When we are home, there is always at least his allergen air filter running which helps to not hear each other.

Me and my FH have lived together over 4 years and I keep an extra blanket on my side for when he wants to steal covers. We also both snore and our friends say we do so in unison lol. We have a king which really helps. After some time this stuff will not even bother you and you will get to the point where it is hard to sleep apart.

I hear you on the blanket stealing! Mine likes to suddenly roll over in the middle of the night, rip all the blankets off me, and burrito himself I've learned to just rip them right back, and he hardly ever wakes up. Sometimes he'll whip his hand out to the side in his sleep and whack me in the face too! And if he starts snoring I'll shove him (increasingly harder if he doesn't stop the first time) and he'll eventually change position so the snoring stops.

It'll always be something, you just have to figure out what works for you!