Don’t let ‘em get to you!

Ugh I am batteling that now... we are doing ours at Todd's moms home but now she is buyin stuff and hiring people without talkin to us first... we didnt want a live band and I dont want the tables with those linens... and I wanted real wine glasses not plastic. SIGH

Oh nooo! Seems like you need to have conversation with her (or ask Todd to talk to her). Would it be too late to back out and have the wedding someplace else? That's always an option to make sure that you maintain control over your choices. Keep us posted! And good luck!

Keep us updated Shauna!

I haven't really had any problems. We did have to keep it a secret for a couple months because FH wanted to for some reason. :-P He let us announce it on our dating anniversary. The only thing I've dealt with is my mom trying to get me to invite extra people. I only sent an invite to a great aunt in FL that she told me would be upset if she wasn't included. So I sent her one knowing full well she would not be able to come since she is in her 90s. And naturally she RSVPed no.

And I just recently handed her an invitation and RSVP for her to mail to an Uncle and Aunt I totally forgot to invite that live in town though I don't see them much. But I thought it would be kind of rude not to invite them since they do live in town. Everyone else I told her forget it, these people, relatives or not, are not a part of my life and I'm not sending them invitations just to "announce" my wedding cause I can't afford them if they do decide to come.

I'm not even sending out announcements afterwards cause I don't think it's necessary to announce it to people that weren't invited because they're not part of my life or not part of it enough.

I was very depressed when I was planning a big wedding which we cannot afford, my FMIL wanted me to invite a lot of extra guests and she refused to pay for them. And we kept getting unexpected expenses. Last month, I put my foot down and decided to reduce the guest list and the locations. The budget is now half of $6k. I feel so much better woot. I agree that it is YOUR wedding or you will regret doing what people want you to do.

Good for you Meg!!! :-) You tell 'em!

Aww thanks I was so busy pleasing my FS's family and at the end, I realized it is not worth it. My DAY, my WEDDING lol.

I have had little trouble with people telling me what I can and cannot do for my wedding. That may be because when my FH and I decided to get married I told everyone that this is my wedding and if I don't want it, its not going to happen. My future MIL is awesome she is actually paying for the rehearsal dinner and also the booze at the wedding because she wants it there. I told her that if she wants booze there then she is going to have to pay for it. My father on the other hand has not payed for a dime of this wedding and I told him since he cannot contribute to this he doesn't get a say in a thing. Just be firm about your opinions and don't let them get to you.

So true kfroman, I believe that people shouldn't have a say if they are not paying for it. My FMIl wanted me to invite great aunts, great uncles, etc. I was like uhh you should pay for those guests. She said it is not my FS's fault to have a big family. Ouch lol.

I wish someone had given me this advice when I got engaged! My fiance gave me the ring for my birthday (2 days 3 days early so it was a complete surprise) and the night before I was to leave for VA to meet my (then) new 6-week old niece...I was so excited I ran downstairs (we were at his house) and told his parents and his aunt and uncle who were there. Well, while I was gone, they took it upon themselves to plan our engagement party - I came back 12 days later to an invitation to my own engagement party!! Even my FS didn't know they were doing that until I confronted him that night of my return! We (he and I vs. his parents) fought for the 8 weeks up to the engagement party, and I didn't register until 2 days prior because we weren't ready for it yet. We'd wanted to buy a house first so we knew what we needed vs. what we had (I had the equivalent of a fully furnished condo in storage - long side story there) so we ended up with crap we didn't need or want or like after that party...

I'm very lucky- no one has butted into our planning at all. Then again, no one has offered to help either...

We are paying for everything, and doing what we want- if we can every figure out exactly what that is...

Ive received lots of suggestions....but FH and I are paying for everything ourselves so I havent listened to anyone hehe