Destination Wedding Rules?

Idk the rules but I’m paying for a rental house for myself, bridal party and their SOs. I think my fiancé is getting a rental house for his guys. We will have hotel blocks for the rest of the guests. I wanted to pay for our mothers too but I’m out of money for that. My dad and stepmom got a rental house for other family that want to stay with them.

Traditionally, if you expect your wedding party yo travel, you pay for their travel ( except by their car) and lodgings. They pay dress within their budget, or suit or tux, buy or rent. They pay for their grooming, hair, makeup, shave, or do their own, unless you request something specific, when you pay if they will do it. You cannot require anything. Any accessories you ask for, beyond, a pair of shoes that look good with the dress, or any getting ready robes or shirts, any bride and wedding party stuff, that you want everyone to have, you buy, and it does not count as any part of a gift, even if they keep it. You are getting it to suit your taste, not because anyone needs it or wants it or will wear it again. It is a prop for you and your wedding, only. Proposal gifts are a recent fad, that the gift industry loves, but they are totally unnecessary. You need not get any, or do something at no cost because it is cute. But not an obligation. You are obliged to give a thank you gift, something meaningful for each person, shop or make something like it is their birthday. But with a destination wedding, you may send or give it after you return. No sense in them paying luggage fees by weight returning with gifts.

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Thank you that helps a lot! I also want to pay for my parents rooms but I don't see that money in the budget.

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Thank you for all that info!

Hi kyra..where are you looking to get married?
I'm doing a destination wedding and I'm not paying for anyone besides my parents and his mom.

I went to a DW in Cancún and we had to pay for everything.. stay, flight and excursions... we are doing a DW and everyone is paying for themselves.. I am letting everyone know over a year in advance so they can save up..

Traditionally, guests and wedding party are responsible for paying for their accommodations for a destination wedding. Bride a groom are responsible for hosting a welcome/rehearsal dinner and or day after wedding brunch and of course the day of wedding reception. I've been to two of them and this is pretty standard. My wedding is in Aruba and this is what we are doing. Just state in on your wedding website. I recommend getting a travel agent. That way, you can direct all your guest to him/her and not have to stress about this part.

Until very recently, it was long tradition that couples pay at least lidgings, and air fare if required, for any distant wedding party, for however long required, whether the wedding was in a hometown, or resort. And many couples would limit the size of wedding parties to those they could afford, that is, maybe 3 BM with one from out of town, vs having 6, with 4 out-of- towners. They could not pay for lodgings and travel for 4. Plus gm from out of town. . . Since the whole boom in TV and wedding industry things this last 10-12 years, that often falls by the wayside. The last 5 weddings I have been in requiring travel, 2 requiring travel to resorts, destinations not where anyone lived, 4 of them offered to pay travel* and lodgings ( *if airfare, not 4 hours by car.) We took 2 up on their offer, as their weddings were $50K plus extravaganzas. But 2 I paid by our choice, since B and G very, very low budget, paying their own just out of school or the military. We paid all lodgings 3 days for all wedding party, who drove 3-4 hours each way to our destination Inn. And we were paying our own under $15 K budget wedding. You should consider the financial circumstances for your wedding. If a few have annual incomes $60,000 plus, and others are $20,000, little disposable income after necessities, you can PRIVATELY offer to pay lodgings or travel just for them, if you want them in WP. And not offer to those for whom $2000 plus travel is something they easily do multiple times a year.

I'm having a DW and have been in 2, your guest and BP pay their own way. I am covering RD/ Welcome baskets/Wedding/Private Reception and an excursion the next day. However for every 20 rooms booked we get 1 free room so essentially my parents, Photographer/ Make-up artist and hair stylist (coming with me from NY) will get free rooms.