Dates

Ah i think it's ok to mourn for the original date - you can STILL have that original date though by doing something special on that day. so just think of the new date as another date in your love story and journey together.

Just breathe. Are you sure you need to postpone? Is it possible to still do a small ceremony on the date you chose with a "zoom" wedding for your parents to see, then have a huge party later on next year to celebrate with everyone?


You have options. Don't panic. ::hugs::

I really wouldn’t focus on a number. My date wasn’t a pretty number but it was such a wonderful day. Now that day is special and has meaning.

View Quoted Comment Melle-you are absolutely right! That date will be another journey in our road together and I wholeheartedly agree, just tell that to my brain lol! Thanks for the encouragement!

View Quoted Comment Thanks Kerin for the ideas! Unfortunately the whole wedding was part of a wedding weekend so it doesn't make sense to do it over Zoom. We also have potential issue with a few of the wedding party who need to have relatives watch their kids and who probably won't be able to...and so on.
FH is not wanting to do an online or in person with just us so that's out. I think being an older couple, first time wedding we want to have all the ceremony and fun. I think it comes down to we would rather not sacrifice things we want. *sigh* I know we're not the only ones going through this! Thanks for the hugs!

View Quoted Comment I understand. Just keep taking deep breaths. I'm an accounting professional so I TOTALLY understand finding symmetry with numbers LOL it's one of the things I consider, too. Look at a calendar and see what other dates you can find that touch that part of your heart, too 😉 whenever you have the wedding, it will be beautiful and perfect for you. Patience is hard, and I personally suck at it, but it's worth it.

I would try to remember that ANY date you get married will be a special date.

I totally get this. When we rescheduled from 10-10-20 (which is an awesome date), we deliberately chose 10-02-21 to honor the digits of 0, 1 & 2 from our original date. But like others have said, any date will end up being perfect!

OMG! Our original date was 5/30/20 (we ended up eloping then) and we rescheduled for 6/12/21. We considered doing our wedding on 5/29/21 (so close to our one year) but I told my husband that date had too many odd numbers and I just didn't like it. I know both of our dates also have odd numbers, but they just feel a little more balanced with having either the day and year or month and day both being even.

You are allowed to be weird and fixated on certain things, and then sad and grieve when Covid-19 messes it all up!

I totally understand using a small thing to fixate your frustrations on in an overwhelming situation - it's not an uncommon coping mechanism for a situation like this. In reality with the date though, it's just a date and any wedding day will be amazing, even if it is an odd number day. I think you need to contemplate all the other frustrations that you may be bottling up and let yourself feel them - you get to be upset about this! It's okay.

View Quoted Comment Exactly! And you're right! Rationally, I know this but yikes it's tough!

View Quoted Comment Thanks Elizabeth! Yes, there are a ton of other wedding and life frustrations going on which is why I think I've gotten stuck on this one thing! It's also a way to avoid a new date. I'll get there eventually!

View Quoted Comment Fleur-I like this! Good point about the numbers! We're also looking at 10/16 which helps my number nonsense and it actually has a great meaning as it is our engagement date!

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Take your time - it's okay to be sad and take time to process this. It can seem silly in the big picture, but we put a lot of time and hope into these days so it's okay to be sad! I'm a huge fan of living in the moment and enjoying it - both the good and bad moments!

View Quoted Comment Kari thank you for this! I was beginning to think I was losing my mind lol! Nice to know someone else gets the whole date thing! Like I said that date had no real special importance UNTIL its been imprinted on my brain for a year! Thank goodness we only had our STD's sent out and nothing else with that date. I'm SO glad you were able to get some of the "even" with 6/12 and that you eloped on your original date! Congrats! I can't get FH to agree to that but I told him we need to do *something* that day.

Go for all odds. And think that the odds are in your favor!!! This is all mindset. I'd take the odds. Lol!

I understand you get attached to the date. Ours was totally random but we got used to saying it and it was jarring to postpone. But at the end of the day there are lots of cool dates to choose from in the year and that will become your new special day!

View Quoted Comment Ditto!!! We’re 10/10/20 too (such a perfect date). But since we’re 99% sure we’ll postpone, I have soft holds with my vendors for 10/2/21. As much as I love 10/10/20 (and will miss it), I’ve embraced 10/2/21. But now we’re going to play on the year “21” as a pun, since we’re having a destination wedding in Las Vegas. Then the date 10/2 (which I view as “ten x two ”) is a nod to our original 10/10 date 😉. Just trying to make the best of it. 🤷🏽‍♀️

Honestly I feel like the less “perfect” looking dates are more special lol. Everyone is going to want to get married on the dates that “look” nice...... but whatever date you get married on is YOURS. The numbers in your date will be special because they’re your numbers

I completely understand the connection to your wedding date since we’re going to postpone ours for a year. It wasn’t easy to swallow because up until last week, we had no plans to postpone. But after a day of sadly processing the reasons why postponing really is the best plan in our situation... I began to make moves toward the new date, contacting vendors and gradually embracing the reality of going from 10/10/20 to 10/2/21. Maybe you can shift from the “even” numbers to all odd numbers. Since your first date had no real meaning at first, you can now select a fun date next year like: 2/20/21, 3/21/21, 7/11/21, etc. Your new date will be even more special since it has a unique postponement story behind it. The situation is definitely full of lemons, so we have have to make lemonade (corny but true)! 😂 Best Wishes!!!!