Dates for Groomsmen and Bridesmaids

We're having them all invite someone to come with them to the wedding. A wedding is WAY more fun when you're able to bring someone.

If they have been dating someone for a long time we are letting them bring their S/O there is only One BM and one GM who aren't dating so we put and guest we figured it would be nice.

Good question. They may have a date join them at the wedding. That would be fine.

We didn't give ours plus ones except for my one BM who's got a boyfriend. they're not dating anyone, so I feel like it would be a really awkward 1st date.. plus since almost everyone is single, it won't be weird. if a lot of them were dating people I would have.

I really DON'T get the whole "Single guests can't have a plus one" thing. If I am invited to a wedding, especially one where I don't know anyone, I would just rather not go at all, than go alone and feel awkward and lonely all night...

@ Morgan, have you been to a lot of weddings where you don't know anyone? just curious. it seems like a lot of my friends move in groups--all my college friends know each other, my high school friends know each other, my BMs have all known each other and me since forever so it wouldn't be an issue because they all know other people who will be there.

@ kahlcara - I get what Morgan is saying. I too would rather not go than go alone. Even if i knew people most would be coupled up and dancing, leaving me sit by myself. If I was ever to receive an invitation without the plus one I would have declined. Pretty soon I won't have to worry about that though : )

I've been to a few weddings of coworkers, and didn't know anyone. Luckily I was allowed to bring FH and even then, it was kinda awkward. But I mean, if it's a wedding where everyone is familiar, that would be better I guess...

I'm expecting mine to bring dates.

We allotted for all of our bridal party to bring dates. It helps that one BM and GM are dating each other, but we wanted them to be comfortable and have a good time even if they just bring a friend.

Yeah, some of the things I was worried about: that the single ones would feel pressured to find a date on top of everything else. In particular, I have one in the process of ending a very bad relationship. She may not be up to it. That their guest would feel awkward sitting through the wedding not knowing anyone... I like the "bring a friend" approach though, vs. "bring a date." I wonder if there's some way to emphasize that?

I mean, I'm not "expecting" mine to, but I'm giving them all the option. I think it's courteous to extend them a date, but if anyone would prefer to come solo, that's certainly fine.

If you're worried about the bridal party's dates sitting alone, you can also forgo having them sit with you at the head table.

Also, looking at your date, you're more than a year out -- who knows what will be going on with that particular bridesmaid when the actual wedding arrives? You might be worrying too early.

All my guests are allowed to bring someone if they wish. I would hate to go to a wedding by myself.

Rule of thumb for me is if they are married, living together, or in serious relationships (to my standards) then they can bring a date. All my bridesmaids are married or in long term serious relationships so they get their dates (who also happen to be my friends). My FH's brother is a groomsmen and is single. Unless he finds the love of his life between now and december he does not get a plus one. I am not spending $200 on some random chick. My brother is a groomsmen and has been in a committed relationship for 2 years so she is coming and she happens to be a close friend. My other brother is 21 and has no girlfriend and is not getting a plus one even though he is a groomsmen.

Up until a week ago (besides my 11 year old sister) all the bridesmaids and groomsmen were in long-term relationships so I gave them each a date for the rehearsal and wedding, obviously to bring their significant other. Recently one of my bridesmaids broke up with her boyfriend. I told her she could still bring a date if she wanted a guy or even another girlfriend not invited to the wedding. I don’t want her to feel left out like she’s the only one at the head table without a date.

I've been to weddings lots without a date (and been a BM) its fun I don't need someone with me.

No one is getting a +1 (if they are in a relationship then I am inviting both not x and guest) they can talk to people.

We allowed it for ours, but honestly unless they were married, they ended up coming alone.

I've been going back and forth with FH about this too. We decided anyone in the wedding party can bring a date. (We want them all to be super comfortable and have a great time.) We went through the rest of the guest list one by one and decided on a person by person basis.

I don't think a +1 has to be defined by being in a serious relationship...JMO. Everyone in my BP is either married, or bringing a friend/date/SO/buddy, whatever. Either way, I'm okay with them bringing someone with them. In fact, I asked the unmarried ones if they were planning to bring someone so I could include them in the head count.

If it's a BP member, you really should invite with guest- they are putting a lot of time, energy, and MONEY into your wedding. Let them choose!!