Covid postponment and slightly bitter in a red state

I’m sorry you’re one salty panda, but I get it. It’s so frustrating to see people not taking this seriously and of course you’d like to have a wedding this year if a darn pandemic wasn’t threatening your guests!!


Ok, your photos are amaaaazing!!! I had to show my hubby. What a crazy cool couple. I want to go to your Halloween wedding. 💀 🖤

I want to give you such a sense of moral superiority. You have sacrificed for the greater good and as much as it sucks it is the right decision! I feel the same way with my postponed wedding, but I would never wish the suffering of covid on anyone! Much love to you guys 💕

We are salty pandas together, though you have awesome photos, so WOW!

I work in theatre, childcare, and restaurants.

...I have not worked since mid-March. I'm high risk, myself. Most days, I can barely get out of bed before 2PM. And I'm right outside NYC... it's been traumatic and awful most months (July and August were... less scary).

So. You are NOT ALONE.

I'm so sorry you've had to postpone, and that people are being so thoughtless.

You have every right to be salty. I'm so sorry your wedding got stuck in the middle of all this. It's truly appalling to see how the US has handled the pandemic, and honestly just embarrassing. I live in Spain, where it's a national mandate to wear a mask in public places unless you're physically in the act of eating or drinking, and it's really not a big deal! It's heartbreaking to see how poor leadership and the uniquely American "me first" selfish mentality has led to so much devastation. Hopefully things start looking up in 2021 and you can have the wedding of your dreams. You absolutely made the right choice in postponing and I commend you for your consideration of others. Those Halloween pics are incredible!

Very beautiful photos. And I admire your resiliency amongst covid. We live in NJ and the majority wear masks. My friend in NC, said about 50% of the people are actually wearing them. It's scary to think that the people that arent wearing them, are actually making this worse. We went from a 92 person wedding to a 7 person wedding. We arent even doing a vow renewal.
So I understand your frustration

Hey Danielle first off...your pictures are awesome!!! We love Halloween and did a dark shoot as well! But, I feel your pain! In the same boat, postponed once already and moving toward a second. Supposed to get married in 100 days but I don't feel comfortable at all risking our health. Just everything sucks about the whole situation. Hang in there and as it gets closer the excitement will return!

Wow salty alright.. but u are wrong with color 🤪 if you google as of dec 8, 2020 which states have the most covid cases the top 5 are: 1. Washington state 2. California, 3.New York, 4. Nevada, and 5. New Jersey... and guess what?!! They are ALL BLUE STATES!!!
And the friends that got married, they probably downsized their weddings and didn’t get their dream wedding either, but hey,! It pays to live near your family!

Pretty pictures!! I get your frustration, but not everyone feels the same way unfortunately. I've seen plenty of people move forward with their huge weddings and I know I personally just would not feel comfortable going to an event with that many people. You were thinking about your guests and if it was worth the risk (which I don't think it was). You were being a good person, don't beat yourself up about it

Like i am sorry you chose not to have your wedding to keep family safe since they wouldnt come to you anyways... but dont blame it on a “red state” when its blue as well now. Good luck with replanning.

View Quoted Comment I believe she was referring to the “red” mentality... not saying that only red states have an issue.

I completely understand your frustration; we have had to postpone as well. It’s one thing to have to postpone due to a dangerous virus/pandemic.... it’s another to have to forfeit your dream wedding due to the selfish actions of others. Compared to other countries, the U.S. has handled this in an embarrassing manner. You did the right thing by postponing and thinking of the safety of your guests. Hopefully the vaccine and new administration will bring about positive change in 2021 🤞🏻 Hang in there girl!
(And your Halloween shoot was sooooo darkly romantic 🖤 Love it!!!!!)

View Quoted Comment Exactly this.

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I agree with this, I don't think that was necessary for her to include. I live in the Northeast, dark blue, and cases are high here too now (again) despite everything.

OP, I am sorry you had to postpone. We were 10/10, also in the South, and we postponed to April of this coming year, so I get the frustration of having to put the day off. But I don't think it is reasonable or quite frankly right for you to be upset with others who did not make the decision you did. There is no mutual agreement the lot of you came to that they then went back on, they simply did what they saw fit and it happened to not align with what you did. I don't think that's fair to get upset over.

You made the decision you did.....which was the right one for you. I was not upset on 10/10 because by that point I didn't even want the wedding on 10/10. Since postponing I have seen people elope, have 50-person weddings, get engaged and plan weddings ahead of my new date, etc. We attended a wedding in August. I was not mad, because the changing requirements made it a bleep-show in the weeks leading up to the event and I told my FI "I am glad this isn't us". But to be upset at someone for making a different decision, at this point, I don't think is fair, or helpful to you. Own your decision, and enjoy your extra time to plan.

I am sorry you are bitter about the actions of others. There are many of us who have suffered in one way or another from this virus. I am also a Covid Bride who postponed from June 2020 to December 2020. Our guest list has shrank from 150 to 36 and counting, we are going ahead with our wedding using precautions such as masks, sanitizer and social distancing. I know you said you have "no judgement" on those who make their choices regarding their weddings during this pandemic, however, the way you described the "friends" of yours who had weddings sounded otherwise. We are all doing what is best for our own unique situations and I do have to point out the facts another PP said earlier, the top states with Covid are the ones with the most stringent rules and regulations. This virus has taken my career (albeit temporarily), school and social life away from both of my children who are entering teenage years and left many of my friends and co-workers without health insurance during a pandemic. IF you want to say you are bitter, fine, but please do not claim to be non-judgmental.

I live in a blue state and I've seen and heard of people in my local area having big indoor weddings still, as well.


I'm sorry you're going through this, I would definitely be frustrated in your position.

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Ummm she was talking about red in terms of covid cases, NOT politics.

Thank you for sharing. I am planning a wedding for September 2021 and am stressed out about the same things. At this point I have resolved to move forward with a wedding for 100 people and hope for the best!! Best of luck to you and know you absolutely did the right thing!! -Sending love and good vibes from PA

You're doing the right thing, weddings are known super spreader events and it's not worth putting lives at risk for a party. It's definitely frustrating to be doing the right thing while watching others being selfish and irresponsible by placing their wants above people's health and lives.

I am salty with you. I was also supposed to get married on 10/31/20 and we postponed because most of our guests would be traveling and many have high-risk conditions. The number of people who have given me quizzical looks when I say we postponed is mind boggling. I’ve actually had to explain that having a wedding in a pandemic is a bad idea.


Stunning pictures! I’m glad you still got to Mark the day. We were going to do a photo shoot as well on 10/31......and then our friend who is also our photographer was exposed to Covid at his job (he’s a doctor) so he was on quarantine. Best of lock to you!😊

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EXACTLY this! Im just salty and depressed. I am happy for my derby mates and am not judging them at all. I know one was going to loss the $10,000 she spent with an all inclusive venue if she postponed or canceled. All of these decisions are tough. I just feel like the girl that got to watch everyone get ready for prom but got grounded and didn't get to go. I'm also so frustrated with being judged for choosing to postpone while no one really bats an eye at the weddings that are happening. I feel like I am crazy. Thanks for being understanding and encouraging. I'm just at a low point and needed to vent to the internet.