covid Postponement #4... Stick with it or cancel?

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First and foremost, I hope your loved ones and family are okay.

I don't think there is such thing as too many postponement when the reason is Covid and being considerate of peoples' health and safety. It's an incredibly hard time for the industry, and I think we can all appreciate that, but that doesn't mean one should either forfeit deposits or alternatively go forward with a wedding date that would be risky or one that would be with restrictions if that's not what you are okay with. We had to reschedule from 2020 to 2021 and may be rescheduling again to 2022. We have the difficulty of an international wedding as my family and my fiance's family are from different countries and don't want our core people to be missing from such a special day.

Also, it's not just a party, but it's a really important day in your lives but also for your families. Your family and friends seem to be understanding and genuinely want to support you and be a part of your big day. I think they all know you do not want to be postponing this and can appreciate just how difficult of a situation it is. I'm so sorry you are going through this again!

I'm in the same boat. Totally understand your frustration. We decided to wait until this over.

Yep that’s what we’ve done! As we’ve gone, we’ve technically had a new date (because we need to). But we haven’t really told anybody or sent new save the dates or anything. We’re waiting until it actually looks promising to spread the word again, and in the meantime if people really want to know they can go to our wedding website. ☺️

I would personally cancel officially with guests, and see what the vendors you've booked through are doing regarding cancelation fees.

If possible, I'd postpone with my vendors to the next year or two and not resend invites with a new date until restrictions are different if I would be hit with a large fee for canceling.

I am also a covid bride from SoCal! I was supposed to be married October 2020 and then postponed to Feb 2021.
We opted to have an intimate family only ceremony & champagne toast celebration. While I do feel like it is different from the original planned wedding, my fiancé and I were happy with the smaller wedding and I honestly could not take the stress of continued planning/postponements.

Write a pros and cons list and take into account your stress levels. I know how stressful it is to be in constant limbo especially in California where we are opening and closing the state so frequently. If you want the big day you originally planned I would postpone, postpone until mid to late 2022, when you can ensure everyone is vaccinated and you can have the day YOU WANT! This truly is unprecedented times so I truly believe there is no rules or etiquette when it comes to postponements, downsizing, canceling, other than being polite and telling the truth!
Either way! You are not alone! The stress, anxiety, tears and confusion are real. Either way I am sure you will have a beautiful memorable day!

Another COVID bride here. We were originally scheduled for July 18 last year, and made the call in May to cancel that big do and came up with a plan B mini-wedding on July 12th that we streamed video to for those who weren't in person (we only had a dozen people at our wedding, all masked/socially distanced with the exception of us & our friend/officiant who is part of our bubble), and did a small/casual outdoor reception for those guests who were comfortable with it in our backyard (it was just tacos provided by a favorite local restaurant and cupcakes, all served by two friends who COVID tested clean before the wedding and volunteered to serve everyone to avoid multiple people at the food table).

We rescheduled our "big" wedding re-do to July this year and just recently made the call to completely cancel that too, as we don't believe restrictions will be lifted enough for our out of town guests to travel safely. As of right now, we're decided to forget about a wedding redo, and will think about a vow renewal and reception at our 5 year anniversary instead.

I just ordered cards to send out to notify all our guest about the cancellation for this year too. Close family/friends already notified in person/by phone.

I would totally recommend to do whatever feels most comfortable for you! If you want to postpone until COVID is completely over, you can still make your wedding work and the right vendors will be available. But, if you're going to postpone again, I would say you should do so at least a year out from August 2021 (August 2022 or later) just to be safe. I know that none of us could predict how long that this would last, but I don't think it would make sense to only postpone another 3-5 months when that doesn't make too much of a difference with COVID.

Hi Emily! I am also an OG Covid bride! My date was 4/5/20 and I shut it down three weeks prior on March 14th after everyone (including my FH family from the UK) had to cancel their trips. Same on the venue and vendors postponing and not refunding. I had a date of 10/25/20 that I thankfully shared with no one and now my date is 8/15/21. I think I am going through with it, simply because I am older with elderly parents (who were both hospitalized with Covid within a week of me postponing my wedding...good times.) I agree with one poster that putting it off a few more months has no guarantees but I am unwilling to move it to 2022 and since I am in NY at least in summer we can move a lot of it outside if need be. You know, in the blazing heat and humidity.

But do not take any of those judge-y comments on board. You do what feels right for you and I 100% disagree with the opinion that it looks like you care more about the wedding than the marriage. What a thing to say. Why should you feel bad for wanting your day -- this has just sucked. And btw me and he have been in a committed relationship for 16 years (longer than a lot of marriages ) and I still want the party!!!
Good luck with whatever you decide.

xoxo

The pandemic could still be going on for years to come, if we define it still going as covid still spreading in the community and people still dying. Have your wedding as planned, or plan it for 2030.