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Msmith
Just Said Yes September 2021

Couples getting married on September 11, 2021

Msmith, on March 29, 2020 at 10:23 PM Posted in Planning 2 18
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Hi everyone getting married on 09.11.21!!!
Has anyone gotten rude comments about getting married on 9/11? How do you deal with it? My fiancé and i are both first responders and we feel like it’s Just a day.

18 Comments

Latest activity by Angelina, on September 29, 2020 at 11:18 AM
  • Natalie
    Devoted November 2020
    Natalie ·
    • Flag
    Out of curiosity, how old were you and your fiancé on September 11, 2001? You are allowed to schedule your wedding any date you choose, but please understand, for many people, regardless of profession, this date brings many emotional memories and can be quite solemn.
    • Reply
  • Msmith
    Just Said Yes September 2021
    Msmith ·
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    Elementary school, we were old enough to know what happened. We do plan on doing a tribute we are not disrespecting what happened just curious if others are getting judged for having their wedding on that day.
    • Reply
  • Devoted August 2021
    ·
    • Flag
    As a New Yorker, I couldn’t even walk by the site for years. In the hearts of many regardless of weather they had a loved one die as a result of that tragic day... the date will forever be tarnished by the terrible,indescribable loss. So it’s NOT just a day in the minds of countless people. Also as a cautionary note, if you’re explanation to the criticism is that it’s just a date, you’ll hit a wall continuously. I wish you lots of luck on your big day.
    • Reply
  • Onya
    Expert October 2020
    Onya ·
    • Flag
    A college friend lost his dad that day so I️ wouldnt Say it’s just a day. But also my future mother in laws birthday is that day as well. It can be tricky but personally I️ wouldnt Pick the date. It’s ultimately up to you guys though. ❤️
    • Reply
  • Sexypoodle
    Master October 2021
    Sexypoodle ·
    • Flag
    Pick the date you want. If people don’t want to come, they aren’t obligated. Having your wedding that day does not take away from what happened on 9/11/01. That will never be forgotten. But it doesn’t mean that nothing else can happen on that same day and that the world needs to shut down and mourn.


    It’s not wrong or disrespectful to get married or even happily live life on 9/11. September 11th is one of my best friend’s birthdays, and we celebrate it each year! So I think it’s great that you can find a way to make the day memorable in a different way.
    • Reply
  • Allie
    Expert November 2021
    Allie ·
    • Flag
    While I agree with PP above that the world can’t always just stop for one day, if you choose that date please keep in mind that some of your guests may not feel comfortable going. That date has different meanings to different people. I have a few friends who lost a loved one to 9/11, and I want them at my wedding, so I wouldn’t pick it. My best male friend also got deployed to Afghanistan as a result of 9/11 and it holds a very somber place in his heart for that reason because he came back completely changed. But if you have guests that don’t mind and you and your fiancé don’t see it that way, then do it! The day is about you two ultimately, so it shouldn’t matter what others think. Just in my mind, there are important people I want part of my day that wouldn’t come on that day, so that’s why I wouldn’t do it.
    • Reply
  • Trisha
    Super October 2020
    Trisha ·
    • Flag

    I See No Issue With It. Your Guests Will Decide Whether To Come Or Not, I Dont Think The Date Should Dictate Your Wedding. Life Goes On.

    • Reply
  • Brittany
    Dedicated March 2021
    Brittany ·
    • Flag

    My fiancé proposed to me in 9/11 in London. We considered it but it’s very insensitive since it marks 20 years since 9/11 and my family is from New York. We lost some loved ones and even had a few close calls. We also wanted to consider the people who would be traveling that day Especially from New York. 9/11 will forever be a difficult day for my family and my home town.


    It’s your day though, if it doesn’t bother you or your family I’d say go for it.

    • Reply
  • Felicia & Roger
    Just Said Yes September 2021
    Felicia & Roger ·
    • Flag

    I am getting married on that date too; persons are like why; but my dad des 09.11.09 so i wanted to incorporate him on our wedding day.

    • Reply
  • Kimberly
    Just Said Yes September 2021
    Kimberly ·
    • Flag
    I got a few ohh no's from my bridal party. We are both from NYC, we didn't lose anyone on that day thankfully. We just figured it is what it is, my fiance has very limited days he can request off from work and the day worked best for us. We have been rebranding it as the eleventh of Sept to try and take the sting out of it.
    My actual problem with the day is people assuming it's cheaper to get married on that day...it's not.
    • Reply
  • Caitlin
    Savvy September 2021
    Caitlin ·
    • Flag
    I have to say we picked this date because our original date was the 19th of this year and because of covid moved it out a year. My FH was a first responder as is all of his family so, without telling him, I might do some tribute for those we lost on that day.
    It is a hard day for many, but a day that should be remembered regardless.
    I am a smidge worried we might get lashed at for choosing the date, but it is your day, so you celebrate it how you want.
    • Reply
  • Danielle
    Expert November 2020
    Danielle ·
    • Flag

    Tell them it is rude to have assumptions and you can pick the date you want to. I think its a great date if you both feel that way.

    • Reply
  • Blane
    Savvy August 2021
    Blane ·
    • Flag
    That’s a tricky one. Technically it is just a date. It can be a birthday or even a anniversary of something special in your life. Some people will only see it as one thing and only one thing, a tragedy. But it’s your wedding and it should be a special date to you. And for that reason I hope people can respect that. But it’s always good to be sensitive to those who lost people that day. Doesn’t mean you can’t turn it into a new beginning. Follow your rules, be sensitive, but most of all surround yourself with people who support you.
    • Reply
  • Amanda
    Just Said Yes September 2021
    Amanda ·
    • Flag
    I am also getting married on that day! I went round and round with it for a little bit and told close friends and family to get feed back and no one seemed bothered. It was the only date available at the venue that we both loved. While I’ll agree it’s not just a day, there are a lot of horrible dates in history. For example, I’m sure plenty of people get married on the anniversary of Pearl Harbor. And if we are going to take into consideration what days people’s loved ones have passed away then your going to be pretty limited on when you can actually get married. I am hoping my guests will be able to think of this as something good on that date! Good luck with your wedding and happy planning!
    • Reply
  • Amanda
    Just Said Yes September 2021
    Amanda ·
    • Flag
    View Quoted Comment
    I also have been telling people the eleventh of September and I have had a few people not even notice the date honestly!
    • Reply
  • Lisa
    Beginner October 2021
    Lisa ·
    • Flag
    Hi, my fiancé felt some kind of way about it at first, but I think it's a way of having something beautiful to come out of a tragedy. It's also right after my mother's birthday so I think it helps me to not be so sad since she is gone. 💙
    • Reply
  • Sexypoodle
    Master October 2021
    Sexypoodle ·
    • Flag
    I replied months ago when this was first posted and it looks like this post has resurfaced. Since then, we’ve postponed to 10/30/21. The interesting thing is that it’s the day my grandmother passed away in 2008. As sad as that day was (and certainly much more personal to me than 9/11), I know that my granny will be happy about us celebrating a new life together and instead of making it a day of mourning. When I called my mom and told her that was the new date we selected, she agreed that there was nothing wrong with it. I give this example because we can respectfully acknowledge death and tragedies. But we still have to live life through it.
    • Reply
  • A
    Just Said Yes September 2021
    Angelina ·
    • Flag

    Hi! I am also getting married on 9/11/21. We loved the venue and it was the only date they had left. Many people have said things like "Oh wow, that's an interesting date" or other surprised reactions, but I've just explained that while it isn't the ideal date, we really wanted this venue. While it's an important and sad day for many, I don't think there's anything wrong with making it into a happy date for yourself (while still respecting and commemorating what happened on that date). I also think that the actual date of your wedding isn't actually that important (even though many people make the date into a big deal), and what matters is that it's a special day for you, your partner, and everyone there to celebrate you.

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