Cooking for reception?

So wait..you're planning on buying kegs, and then having people pay cash to get a beer?

Who is going to stand by the keg all night then taking the cash?

Besides that whole thing, cash bars are just a bad idea, and especially if people would just be paying you back for what you already purchased....

Amanda, don't be snarky. She's really trying to figure this out.

Bella, I really would suggest cutting your guest list. And finding a caterer that can properly host this event for a reasonable number of people so you can enjoy your day without you and your family having to worry about cooking and cleaning.

Please hire a caterer with staff and a bartender. Don't invite 140 people to 2 day old food that will run out, and alcohol they have to serve themselves or pay for. Cut your guest list if you have to. Have a wedding you can afford.

Hire a caterer or go to Costco.

You will need to heat up everything in an oven or on the stove before you set it out in chaffers. Do you have multiple ovens to heat up food for 100 people? Do you have fridge space for prepared salads and dishes? Do you plan on renting serving utensils, bowls, chaffer sets, etc?

Who is going to clean up the food when dinner is over? Do you expect family and friends to stop their socializing and clear plates?

One of my friends did this at her wedding and it was terrible. Her mom, dad and aunts were literally running everywhere during the reception trying to take care of everything. They didn't get to socialize with anyone. They also had set out mini-cheesecakes that they had made, but then they kind of forgot about them. So by the time they were served, they had been sitting out for 4 hours and the majority of us got food poisoning. They are very food safety savvy and didn't plan for dessert to sit out that long, but they just got caught up in the moment.

Who would set up and clean up all of this? Please don't say your family.....

@Briana, OP has gotten a lot of useful suggestions. She is choosing not to listen. Even after examples were given to her about other weddings and how badly they turned out, she still thinks she can have her family cook for 140 people. And now she's thinking about a cash bar? I'm sorry, but no. Sorry you think I'm being snarky, but OP is one idea away from charging her guests to come to her wedding.

I feel like no matter how many times this is explained to you that its a bad idea, you just keep coming back with excuses for why your wedding will be the exception. so whatever. self-cater away.....

FutureMrsR: Well there is the option of Sam's Club but i'm not sure prices. I think i seen at a party store that the dishes are around 40 for a set. We have two refrigerators, future MILs house, families houses, not sure of that yet.

Sarah Kat: We'd be using paper plates and such.

FutureMrsR: Good point. And the venues we're looking at doesn't require a licensed caterer.

Amanda: ......

EmilyT: no not for beer. The cash bar would be if they want a certain beer as it will probably be budlight and corona in the kegs or if they want a mixed drink or such. The only reason we're considering a cash bar is because if we don't have it, its possible his friends would literally leave, go to the ABC store or a gas station, get cases of booze and bring it back and I don't want that in my pictures.

Briana: Thank you. I'm not sure why she was being rude. I actually was telling future hubby last night we need to cut the guest list down because I had estimated in my head less then 100 who will actually show up but when I actually wrote it...yeah.

No. Cash bars are unacceptable. If your FH's friends are rude assholes, that's on them. You don't pre-empt their rudeness by being rude. If you can't afford booze, don't have booze.

I find it interesting that no matter how many times you've been told it's a bad idea and no matter how many people (myself included) give you horror stories you still want to self cater.

So basically, you'd be providing a limited bar - a couple of beers, maybe wine if your guests would even be into that, and then a cash bar for premium beers and mixed drinks? Nothing wrong with that. We're doing a beer and wine bar. If our guests want liquor, they pay for it.

Side bar: I just read this whole post and kept thinking...who the heck is Niki. I scroll past your posts just knowing its sugar unicorn, without looking at the name under your picture and then finally realized you changed you name!

OP: I can't really add anything that someone else hasn't already said. This is a bad idea all around. Have you ever had a dinner party or bbq for 20 or so friends....that is a lot of work. Multiply that times 5 then add in all the other running around everyone does in the week before your wedding. It's madness...let your family enjoy your day with you. Get a local restaurant to cater or hire a professional caterer and cut the guest list, or get a second job and make up the difference, there are lots of ways to make it work without making your family work on your wedding day.

JClovesDM: Costco? People do that? What do they do?

Katia: IF we do it, we'll have paper plates, throw away metal serving dishes and the like. Storing would be a dilemma.

Amanda: I am listening and I am considering ALL options. I've already explained the reason we are considering a cash bar. Some people do a dry reception and that's fine but I know my guests and they'd rather pay then not have it.

Niki: i'm just listening to everyones point of view. i am considering catering if i can find somewhere that doesnt charge an arm and a leg.

Stephanie: I just know that they'd rather have the option then not. Cash bars are common here.

ChildressToBe: i'm listening, trust me, i am considering catering, i plan on discussing all of this with FH and MOH.

FutureMrsR: thank you. we're having kegs, our guests wouldn't be into wine, i personally only drink wine on thanksgiving and only arbor mist which isn't exactly wine. we'll have a few different punches with alcohol in them. i just know everyone enough to know they'd rather have the option to pay then not.

Somebody still has to clean up paper plates, take out garbage, get rid of the chaffing dishes and serving pans, and clean the kitchen.

Can you get hot deli food delivered? Costco, Sam's club, whatever. I believe stores like walmart will deliver deli food like fried chicken, salads, ect.

Also, don't stress about the cash bar. A lot of people here are rabidly against it, but I think it really depends on your area. I live in Los Angeles and cash bars are quite common. I personally am doing a beer/wine bar though.

I do think it would be weird to do a cash bar if you bought all the liquor yourself.

As for the food poisoning situation, that depends on a lot of things. Few times I've gotten food poisoning was from caterers or restaurants.

but as for self catering, I'm finding that means different things to different people. When I was planning my wedding I considered self catering but it was going to be food prepared by a Deli or places like that. I was also looking at a very small group of people as well.

My expected amount of guests was never to be over 30 people, even at the deli route I wouldn't have considered it for 100 or more people. I would just start calling around and see about caterers and what they charge. There's possibly places like chipoltle if they will suit you as well.

I've been in a historical reenactment group for years and when they do feasts they set a maximum number of people to sell feast tickets for in order to keep the number of people to cook for from going too high. I've never heard of a feast being done for anymore than 50. Usually the max is more like 25.

I was queen of DIY and I have to agree with others. The amount of people you are looking to have, this sounds like it's going to be too much work to handle and still enjoy the wedding. If a meal is going to prove too much for you, IMO there's nothing wrong with a wedding that is after 7 with things like just cake and drink. My parents had a beautiful candlelit service at that time. Something to think about.

I am also of the opinion that cash bars are rude. But people that think they aren't don't care and do them anyways. Fine. I obviously can't change your mind, but if I can suggest something is to either have a cash bar all night or only beer and wine all night. It's going to get awkward when you run out of free booze, someone comes to ask you, and you say "well that's all we bought so you have to pay for your own now"

Can you cut corners? A more simple cake, a less expensive photographer, DJ, etc?

Several day old food and a bowl of chips?