Controlling bridesmaids

@ayemvee I'm good on hanging out with her after she basically called me a bad friend.

If she doesn't like it, then she doesn't have to use your artist. Or an artist at all. You can't force someone to like who you like. She has options to do her own makeup or use her own artist.

Why isn't she allowed to use someone else for her makeup?

I feel like you're thinking "it's my way or the highway" which really isn't very fair to your bridesmaids. She may be difficult, but as StephanieNaz previously posted, you can't force someone to like what you like, and if she doesn't want to have her makeup done by your artist, you can't do anything about it.

@stephanie not in my wedding period they knew over a year ago about my plans and I asked them did they have a issue with anything so we could address it everyone agreed so the only option is to drop out. I didn't argue with her when it came to her wedding and what she wanted I deserve the same respect

Tiffany - I agree she sounds like a pain, but unless you are gonna tie her into the makeup artists chair and hold her down while they do her makeup, she has a choice.

If you're paying for it she should have it done, but unfortunately you can't force her if she decides she doesn't want to.

Chances are she will love it and just get some things out of the way before the big day. I'm guessing she probably will be picky and a pain in the butt for the makeup artist too, so at least maybe it will help get some of that out of the way at the trial!

I'm sorry she's giving you such a hard time!

My FMIL is the same way. She wants to go every weekend but I am so over it. She just wants to point out how we should be doing everything. I don't have my DOC or my dj booked but I have appointments with a few of them to talk.

Have you asked her why she wants a consultation? Have you talked with her about how you're feeling she's too pushy or whatever?

Maybe something is going on you don't know about. You said she changed after she got engaged, and married. Maybe something is going on? There could always be an underlying reason to her difficultness.

Oh ok, but she's the controlling one

@futurerios her husband asked me not to and I mean crying asking me to try and work with her. I tried taking her out to dinner and talking to her but she was not interested in talking. Something is going on but does that mean I have to sit back n that her mess? It makes me feel horrible that we are taking a cruise for my bachelorette party and nobody wanted to room with her to the point I had to suggest she bring someone she knew.

If you know something is going on, you should be more sensitive to her. Just be a friend to her as much as you can. Maybe that's what she really needs - especially if all the other bridesmaids, and assuming you, are beginning to shut her out.

If I was going through something and wasn't acting myself, and my 'friend' started shutting me out along with all the other bridesmaids, I would be very hurt, and in turn probably act more difficult.

I'm not saying that's what she's doing, but try to look at it from her perspective. Your bridesmaids are your FRIENDS first, then your bridesmaids.

I guess I don't understand how she's being controlling. Difficult? Annoying? Maybe.

I mean, let's be honest. You're controlling your bridesmaids to the point where you are dictating who is touching their face, the fact that they HAVE to get their makeup done and they HAVE to use your MUA. Why do you care so much about their makeup? I mean sure it's nice to be pampered, but some women just aren't into it, or they have sensitive skin and can only use certain makeup and you're demanding it. I personally have never liked my makeup done by someone else ever.

I was hell bent on making this experience as painless as possible for my BMs because a) I've been in some weddings that SUCKED and b) were at the time in our lives where everyone is getting married.

I had dinner with one of my BMs last night and she mentioned that she really wants to be a part of helping out. So I decided to invite her to go to a bridal show next weekend. I have 75% of my vendors why not? We can walk around, talk about the wedding and try some free samples. Why the F not? What's the big deal? It's something fun to do with those excited for you.

@futurerios I tried trust me I did but I can only take so much and he telling me I was a bad friend was what sealed it.

Tiffany- to be honest I'm getting visions of you stomping your feet and screaming " but I'm the BRIDE."

If she wants a consultation let her. If she doesn't like the artist let her get her own.

This is not a friendship ending thing and I think you're the one being difficult

@vicki I have been to 4 different bridal shows since I got engaged a year ago. I'm good on bridal shows we are at a point instead of me paying for tickets to those things I'm paying off my vendors and if I told u this once that I don't have a reason to go then why make the suggestion again?

@houligantobe I am not that bride at all I had a meeting and asked what everyone thought she said nothing so why wait months to the wedding to now complain

Because maybe she didn't want to be the one friend saying no?

I don't see what the big deal about going to a bridal show or letting her get her own makeup artist is.

Bridal show tickets aren't that expensive. Go, wander, try free samples and let her feel included.

It probably is annoying to you because you don't want t go. I don't think she is being controlling. But I will say, some of the free things you can win isn't always a vendor. I won a vacation from attending a bridal show. Who doesn't want a free vacation? But, I would just let her know you aren't interested in all the extras and just want to go on about your planning.

I don't wear makeup on a regular basis. Only mascara and a little eye shadow on the weekends, literally nothing during the week. Extremely rare for me to put on face makeup. Getting my makeup done for my wedding is something I'm stressed about. It isn't pampering to me. I have a face full of freckles and don't like how makeup covers them. With the right makeup artist, I know they will know what to do but if someone forced me to get makeup done by someone and I couldn't have a consultation, I would be stressed. I wouldn't feel pampered.

In regards to the bridal show thing. I can see that being a little annoying if she constantly brings it up. Best advice I can give for that is to politely continue telling her that you don't want to go to one.

Yea I'm over it I'm a just let her do what she do and I won't say nothing. It is what it is if she is singled out it will be because of her own reasons. After the bad friend comment our friendship is over anyway I'll just be civil for the sake of our men but hanging without the guys us out