Cocktail hour, wine during dinner, champagne toast then cash bar - Is this enough or rude

I'm Team Emmy on this one- I think if that's your feeling (you'd rather pay for something that you want because the variety of liquor is so important) then you should be paying for your guests to have an open bar.

Sounds fine to me, we did something very similar. Cash bars are estremely common where I'm from.

I agree with JSARGE that if you're going to do a cash bar, please let your guests know ahead of time. Not everyone travels with cash.

If we're picking teams, I'm on team Kassy.

I know @Kassy sorry if I wasn't clear. As a guest you just gotta be gracious for what they provide. More problems come with people not being able to get ANYTHING unless they brought their wallet. So i think as a guest you have to deal with what they provide for you- and if you feel strongly about a variety and are disappointed as a guest, the only thing you can do is make sure you have an open bar when your wedding comes.

TEAM EMMY!

As a guest, I love my cold ones (beer) and if I went to a wedding and had to pay for my own, I would not be a happy camper. And if I didn't have cash on me, I would really not be a happy camper.

Weeeee! Team Me!

Another thing that may save money for the champagne toast- I personally love champagne- but when i go into a reception and the drink is warm- I don't even drink it and it goes to waste. For our wedding, once guests sat down- the servers went around to each table to see who wanted champagne for the toasts. We were only charged for the bottles that were opened. So if only half your guests opt for the free toast- you can save a lot on the unopened bottles

This seems totally fine to me. This is the complete norm in the UK - very few weddings have completely open bars. Most do something similar to this, with a cocktail hour and/or wine with dinner but everything else cash.

I think it's wrong to suggest that just because you can afford to have an open bar you should. I can afford to buy a 1000 dollar wedding dress, doesn't mean I'm going to because to me it's a waste of money. For some people alcohol is the same. I'd rather up the money I'm spending on food and pay less for alcohol. It's just not a priority to me.

Plus you know your crowd better than anyone else. For example I have two recovering alcoholics at the wedding (one being FH) and they are uncomfortable around free flowing alcohol.

I think it's a judgement call depending on your social circle. But it seems fine to me.

Side note: I would always rather go to a cash bar wedding and have the option to buy a drink, rather than a completely dry wedding where the choice is out of my hands,

I personally think you should provide more alcohol during the reception (team Emmy?). I tend not to take advantage of the open bars during cocktail hour because 1) im usually standing/mingling and it's hard to eat and drink and stand at the same time and 2) if I haven't eaten in a while then I don't want to get sloppy drunk by starting the night drinking heavily on an empty stomach. At weddings, most of my alcohol consumption is as the dancing is getting started and towards the middle of the night when I need a break from the dance floor. I would be disappointed to find that I have to pay for drinks later in the night because I was a responsible drinker and didn't partake earlier in the evening. I would recommend looking into at least beer and wine for your reception.

TEAM KASSY. I had a really bad experience with a dry wedding. I would've given anything for an open bar

You may also want to see how much it would be do a la carte instead of what is included in the package. For our vow renewal, we had a "wedding package", but then started calculating things a la carte and some things in the package we didn't need. For instance, we nixed the centerpieces that came with the package and did our own. We changed the bar from premium liquor to name brand which didn't make a big difference because Absolut (name brand) was just as good and Kettle One (premium) for guests who don't have to pay for their drinks.

Said all that to say, if they offer everything separate, see if you really need everything that is included in the package because you may save money on the things you don't need and put that money towards a wine and beer option.

I think this is a regional thing. I personally have never been to a cash bar, nor did I even know they existed prior to WW, but I guess cash bar is better than dry wedding...

Im editing my comment, as I have now read through them all. Get rid of the open bar for one hour and offer beer/wine all night. Id rather have that than cash bar.

Also, I hate it when the bride says well... I don't drink. Okay, well I don't dance. Should I cut my music? No, bc what is a celebration without some booze some music some cake, etc

Edited again bc Ive been to a beer and wine only wedding and it was semi boring in my opinion. Open Bar, All Night, All The Way is my Team. TEAM BOOZE. TEAM IM DOING SHOTS.

I would definitely let your guests know ahead of time, we bring cash to weddings but like $20 to throw in the tip jar. Not enough to buy drinks. And I really hate to say this but I think cash bar would affect my gift (I've actually never been to a cash bar wedding) and I would want to know ahead to adjust. Sorry I know I sound like an asshole- but we are gift heavy, and you're talking $50-75 for 2 people to buy drinks on top of that.

But I don't think it's rude of you, just let your guests know so they can be prepared to shell out some cash for drinks if they so desire. Also- we removed the champagne toast. It took off 2.00 per person, maybe but that and try doing beer and wine?

I don't care if it's a regional thing or not...cash bars are still rude because you're asking your guests to open their wallet at an event you're hosting. It's the same as if you were hosting people in your home. You don't open the bar for the first hour and then say "Sorry guys, cash from here on out cause I gotta buy a car next month!".

I don't see why you can just offer beer and wine for the entire night. Skip the champagne toast and drop the full bar at the cocktail hour and it should cost about the same. It's the tier thing that bothers me the most, like you could have a glass of wine or bottle of beer for free in the first hour but in the second hour it's suddenly $5.

Ur plan sounds great. I wouldn't change it for anyone. I'm a drinker and I would be fine at your wedding.

No duh drinkers are going to be fine. They're gonna get shit faced during cocktail hour and then not even remember it was a cash bar later in the day

This is a hot topic! A lot has to do with the expectations of your social circle. People often say that it's a regional thing but there are differences within regions; it really is more a societal thing based on the company that you keep.

In our crowd it's a mix, we see open bar, limited bar, open bar for a while then cash bar, or straight cash bar. I don't care which one it is- we give the same gift and have fun at all of them.

Your outline sounds good to me, but... if your social circle usually serves an open bar at events, the guests will likely have opinions on this (as you can see from this forum).

Edit: I just read through some of the recent comments. Maybe some of the difference is based on the price of drinks at a cash bar. Usually they get reduced prices, so we are looking at $5-$6/drink. If we were looking at $10+/drink we would limit what we purchase.

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