Christian wedding

It depends on your denomination. If it is really important for you to be married in the church, talk to your pastor about holding a small ceremony. If he cannot do it, he may be able to refer you to another congregation where this is possible.

You can still get married by a pastor and have a really small ceremony. Talk to your church. You can just get married at your church and have just immediate family (or whoever you want) there. Or you can get married at your home, at a park, anywhere you want. However getting married at a courthouse by a judge doesn't make it a fake marriage!! That's ridiculous. By the the way she said Christian wedding, not catholic. Christians are not nearly as strict about everything.

Thanks everyone for the comments. I can't keep up! We are both Christians and I would feel more comfortable if a religious officiant married us. FH doesn't seem to think it matters but I do. If I belonged to a church I would maybe do it there and ask the pastor to do it but we unfortunately have been in the process of finding a church we want to attend and I'm not going to lie, we have trouble sticking to going.

Does anyone know if a courthouse will allow an officiant to do it or does it have to be the judge?

I think God recognizes and honors the heart of your commitment to one another and not the ceremony. If you are dedicating yourself to each other in a church or in a courthouse, your vows and the holiness of that decision and commitment is the same. I would say, don't get caught up in the "legality" of marriage. God cares about the heart!

Also, I understand catholics have strict rules about it but my beliefs on that subject matter are different, as I am a Christian. But thanks for the feedback.

One other thing, I say it's more expensive because

the extra decor, some venues charge extra to have it, or to set up walls and drapery, etc. But honestly I think it's also because he has no groomsmen and I was thinking of having 4 bridesmaids (awkward), you have to do rehearsals and it would be a pain to get everyone to meet at the same time, I'm not one for attention so all the eyes on me would make me extremely nervous as I walked down the isle, and yeah. I'm trying to outweigh the good and bad because I'm going to miss my niece being the flower girl, my dad walking me down & such

Nobody here can make that decision for you

If I'm not mistaken, the Baptist (I grew up Baptist) interpretation of the Bible states that a wedding ceremony is nothing more than 2 people agreeing to marriage in front of witnesses.

That being said, I was married by the magistrate of my county and I'm not in the least bit worried that God isn't happy. If it's eating you up this much, you should probably look into an independent religious officiant. You can't go back and do it over. Don't settle because people on the internet had civil weddings and are happy.

@Yasmin--Catholics are Christian, just a different denomination. And if the only things stopping you from being married in a church are cost, ceremony decor, balancing out the bridal party, flower girls and being walked down the aisle then is a religious ceremony really that important to you? Because your reasons for not getting married in a house of worship have nothing to do with religion.

Will the court allow you to do your own vows? If so, incorporate the Lord and use scriptures etc. If not, God sees marriage as a covenant and you are making that covenant. Honor him with your marriage (not just ceremony) and I believe that is ok. IMHO

Why do you need walls and drapery? What extra decor? It's also totally ok to just have four bridesmaids and no groomsmen. Sides do not have to be equal. If you are both Christian, these seem like silly reasons not to have a church wedding if you'd both be more comfortable with a pastor like you said. Find a church with a pastor you like and make a commitment to attend if that's what you want. Marriage is a commitment too, one you don't have the luxury of saying you have trouble sticking with it.

There is a third option - you can hire a pro vendor who is able to incorporate Christian elements. You've blocked vendors in this thread (and you shouldn't - they can't advertise but have tons of experience and great advice), but there are absolutely non-clergy officiants that can add prayers and readings. Have you searched the vendor tab here? If you have a pro officiant, you can get married anywhere they're willing to go and there's no need for a church or courthouse

Some places I've went to have a big room to have both the ceremony and reception in one place. To separate the 2 they can add either drapery or walls. I've just never seen a wedding with both in the same space next to each other so I assumed I needed the seperations. Also, I don't belong to a church right now so whatever I do find will cost money to rent, ceremony decor, and officiant fees. I want my faith to be a part of my wedding because I see our marriage as a covenant with God not just us. My reception will have some signs with bible verses and such. I would just want someone to marry us that makes our faith part of his speech. Even a prayer afterward will be nice. ?? Also, we aren't doing (personalized) vows. I don't know if it's a cultural thing but I don't think Hispanics do them? Not a priority of mine...I could do without (stating personal vows). as long as we both state to promise to love one in another in sickness and in health <3

The part where you promise to love one another in sickness or in health are vows... You kind of need those for your marriage to be legal.

Where are you located? Try the vendor tab here and search for someone in your area.

@MrsSki I meant personalized vows!! Lol sorry. I'm definately doing traditional ones but not personalized where I read something from a paper and he does to.

Haha. And I'm in Garland Tx

It depends on your denomination whether they will recognize a court wedding. However, there is no reason you can't do a ceremony with the pastor and witnesses only.

Girl its your day. Do what you want.

You can get an officiant that is also a man of the cloth. FH and I are not super religious but my mom was very disappointed we were not getting married in a church. We decided to hire an officiant who is also a Reverend and he will perform a Christian-lite ceremony. We thought this would please both sets of parents.

Um, Lana, there are women of the cloth too. Lots of us, in fact, at last count in the UUA? More pastors were women.

But I digress.

I think you need to decide together what's important to you. I've done services that were very Christian in tone and content, and many that were not at all even though both people in the couple were Christians. Most pastors will marry people in an outside locatIon, it is highly unusual to get an actual Catholic priest to do that because it goes against basic Catholic doctrine, as I understand it. (There are people out there who claim to be Catholic priests in 'ancient sects' or use other bogus gibberish to suggest that the wedding will be a sacrament, but it's not.) I have had several couples get married by one of my officiants and then have their wedding convalidated in the Catholic church afterwards, but the license is signed by me.

This isn't a decision that should be made based on logistics; it needs to be made with your heart. If you truly want a "church" wedding, either get married in a church or find a pastor who will do a religious ceremony at your venue or in a park or other location. Most courthouse weddings are as secular as you can get, and no, most courthouses will not allow outside people to come in and do a ceremony.

And finally, I don't know if this is true for all states, but you need some sort of vow; that has nothing to do with being Hispanic. They can be traditional, personalized, or in the form of a question that you answer, but they need to be there.

I'm a civil wedding officiant, but frequently mistaken for a clergyperson -- because if the couple wants a prayer or religious reading, I'm not adverse to that.