Choosing guest list based on venue limits

No photographer to include in the count?

Hi Keri! I’m getting married next year too so I don’t have any personal stories about guest counts, but we had way more people than we expected show up to my sister’s wedding. There were a bunch of guests from all over the place and they all made it! (Granted this was 2019 so it was a lot easier for everyone to get everywhere). I think maybe give yourself a little more buffer. Maybe limit the list to 90 guests so you have space for other vendors/staff you might need? Maybe the ceremony can be live streamed for anyone who can’t attend in person/out of town guests? Wishing you the best!

Please: never assume that 5+ people will RSVP no and/or won't show up.

Your best bet: cut some people off the list.

Your wedding is in nov. 2022, that means you have yet to send your save the date cards . I assume you didn't tell all of them you're 100% sure they are invited.Sure, feelings could be hurt but as long as you don't univite someone who received a STD, you'll be fine.

And a capacity restriction is ALWAYS a valid reason to cut someone, especially if you're not lying about the 'real' capacity limit.Last but not least: KiwiDerbyBride made a great point.You have to put ALL VENDORS on your guest list, including the wedding planner if you're planning to hire one, so you may need to remove more than 5 people.

We invited 80 something guests and 20 declined. So unless you know for certain that your guests will show, anything goes.

Hey I’m getting married that day too!!!
Personally I would not assume people won’t come. I would stick to the fire code count and only invite what that allows.

Do not assume people will not come. Always invite only what you have space for and don’t forget all of your vendors.

Thanks everyone!! I too agree that we shouldn’t invite more than the fire code but haven’t some trouble convincing family members of this, so thanks for the reassurance!
Also, I can’t believe we forgot to count photographers so thanks for that!!

Here’s the next dilemma- it is only the ceremony venue that has this fire code. Our reception venue can fit up to 250. Do you think it’s better to just cut people and not invite them to anything or just invite some people to the reception? If we were to do this tier wedding it would only be people from my guest list, and not my fiancé’s, because all of his guests are out of town and most of mine are local. He does not want to ask people to travel and not invite to both.
Thanks everyone!

I also wouldn't assume people wouldn't come. I know you'd love to assume that and it would make things so much easier for you, but you just can't ever know. One of my cousin's invited 150 guests and 100 showed up, but one invited 30 and almost 50 showed up (what a nightmare). One friend invited 200 and had 175, and one invited 200 and had almost 230 (small town problems). It's a complete gamble.

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The general consensus on WW is that inviting people to just the reception comes across as super rude. As if they weren't good enough to be invited to the ceremony but you'll invite them to the dinner after. I think it really depends on your guests and your circle, but if the ceremony and reception are on the same day and you're inviting a large number to the ceremony, it's a no-go. Small ceremony with just parents? Sure, invited everyone to the reception. 90 person ceremony? Better just invite the same 90 to everything.

We have invited 120 people and 103 have RSVPd yes (it's a destination for almost all of our guests, about 40 are coming the day before the wedding, 90% are staying at a hotel the night after) - we originally thought that we would have about 90 guests show up due to them having to travel, but seems like we don't know our crowd as well as we thought but we do think that some may still decline on a short notice or not show up, especially if our state requires everyone attending a private gathering to be vaccinated.


So just go through your list and decide if you see some people that may not attend. Honestly, I think I would have sent STDs to all 103, but that depends on whether some are just "courtesy invitations" for people who won't show up anyway or if you think that there's a chance that they might all respond yes.

The guest list should be finalized as the very first step, along with figuring out budget and vision, before you book the venue or even shop for one. Because you send save the dates out immediately after booking the venue at 6-12 months and they cannot be revoked once they are sent.


You also need a finalized guest list to make sure the venue accommodates everyone. Never ever assume you will have guaranteed no shows because 100% attendance is very common. Invite your must haves only and send announcements after the wedding to everyone else.

View Quoted Comment It’s my dream place to get married and so it was being chosen no matter what. When we chose it we knew we would have limits to our guest list.

I got married on July 31,2021 of this year. We were keeping it small of 75 guests and I had about 17 no shows, and they actually RSVP Saying Yes they were coming, so we only ended up with a total of maybe 58/59 people.. Like the others said, its just hard to really know..