Children

I like the name Ruby too!
I don’t want kids anytime soon and a part of me isn’t even sure if I want any, to be frank. My husband isn’t fond of the idea of kids now either so we weren’t gonna touch the topic again til much later on when we feel ready

View Quoted Comment Its a big responsibility to say the least. Life changing obviously.

My husband and I have been trying to have children since a few months after our wedding. Needless to say, it hasn’t gone well, and we are starting IVF later this month 😕 since we both knew we definitely wanted children, I am really glad we started so soon, because it is turning out to be way more difficult than either of us imagined. I’m just glad that at least time is on our side now.

View Quoted Comment ♥️ My heart goes out to you. This is also a great thing for me to keep in mind. If I wait too long it may never happen. I will pray for you and good luck and if it helps you to vent n just remember you can always keep us posted you know its always just a click away girl. #PrayersUp

My fiancé and I already have a 2 year old and he is literally the best thing that’s ever happened to me/us and we wouldn’t change anything. Even on my worst days he brings so much joy to me. Yes it is a HUGE responsibility but I wouldn’t change it for the world

Sounds like a lot of turmoil!

We decided no kids. Honestly, and please no one take this the wrong way, I just have no interest is kids restricting my life. I have had many people tell me how wonderful it is having kids, and I’m sure it is for some. But I also see and talk to a lot of people who are sleep deprived, irritated, haven’t had a holiday in years, and spend all their money on the kids. Also, child birth affect the women in my family poorly. Maybe I am selfish, but I want to travel kid free, do what I want, relax and have me time! Shout of to the women who want to be mothers, and are mothers! People who have those motherly instincts should have cute little babies!

Do what’s truly in your heart. Why don’t you want to have them? I’m sure all first time mothers are scared and unsure, then turn into the most amazing mommas out there.

View Quoted Comment Thanks dear! I’m not sure how old you are either, but that could factor into the decision too. I’m 23 so I still have a good number of eggs and my doctor things we have a high chance of success because I’m so young. If we waited until I was 30+ the odds would’ve been a little less in my favor. But I mean, if we had waited until I was 25 or something it probably wouldn’t have made a huge difference. Mostly I’m just glad we started when we did, not because of “age” but because I felt ready when I did. Like when I was 22 even a few months before we got married I was already having crazy baby fever 😂 My point is if you’re not ready don’t rush it just because you’re nervous about waiting too long but also, if you do think you’re ready then don’t put it off.


Also like, when we first started trying, my husband was really anxious about it and constantly second guessing “am I really ready for this” etc. Now after all we’ve been through, he’s SO ready to be a dad, and he’s like “yeah I can handle anything now” hahaha. So, idk that anyone will ever feel 100% confident about being ready when they decide to start trying, but if it’s what you both want then you’ll rise to the occasion when you need to! ❤️

I don’t think anyone ever feels truly ready to be a parent. It’s a monumentous task and there’s so much stacked against us, stacked against the kids, and craziness in the world. But all of that said, I’ve wanted to be a mom my whole life and being a dad has been a longtime dream of my FH as well. We have our own list of reasons for wanting to parent, but at the same time I do understand those who decide to not have children.

View Quoted Comment Well it’s not that I don’t want them per se its more of I’m just not 100% sure. Like you said, ZERO free time. Sleep deprivation. Money. Its quite the handful.

Me and my fiancé know we want kids shortly after getting married. I have known since I was a teenager that I wanted kids early in life, he’s the same way. I’ve worked with kids since I was 11, babysitter, nanny, and now a infant room daycare teacher. Wedding is October and we plan on trying next summer, so a little more then 6 months of being married (we have lived together for a year already). We talk about how we want to raise our kids, how nighttime schedules will work and other parent type things. I think since we talk about it so much it helps us feel more comfortable and confident in having kids. We talk about the easy things and the hard things that come along with kids.

View Quoted Comment Yeah, I feel like for me finding child care for us when we work would be the scariest factor. Leaving my baby with someone I don’t know is so nerve racking to me.

I can completely understand that. I’d be in the same boat if it wasn’t for the fact that I am a childcare worker and my baby will be coming with me to work.

To be honest, I don’t think there is ever a ‘right time’ to have children in the way you ask - there will always be dangers and threats in the world, and COVID-19 is just one of them we are currently dealing with (hopefully not for much longer). Realistically, if and when you have children depends entirely on you and your partner; are you ready for the commitment? will you be able to manage the change in lifestyle that having a child brings at this point in your lives? financially can you *comfortably* afford to have someone depend on you? Most importantly, right now do you want children?


I don’t think there is any set way to otherwise answer your questions because at the end of the day it all comes down to you and your partner and your circumstances and intentions. My FH and I are in a position in our lives where we could have children now if it happened, but we just aren’t quite ready for all that it brings.
My mother has always told me, you can never 100% be prepared for children because it’s a lifelong journey full of twists and turns but you ride them out

I’ve heard a lot of people say that a year of a newly married couple to spend together before kids is the usual.

I've been open about us TTC.

I'm 37, and I've always wanted kids. Even when things get awful, and that terrifies me, I've still always wanted kids. DH has, too.

It's a massive responsibility, yes, but we know we won't be alone, we know we're trying to make things less terrible, and, well, the world goes on. Life goes on. Even if you get into the eco-guilt... life goes on.

Mostly, we want kids because we both love kids, we love watching them grow and change, and become whole new human beings. We're kind of excited to see how we could help one grow.

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My prayers are with you guys and may you guys get that blessing of becoming parents

I've gone back and forth about having kids my whole life. I'm 35, and now that I have an adorable niece and nephew, I want to give them cousins. I had so much fun with my cousins growing up. I'm also marrying a man who will make a great father and partner. Plus my parents are AMAZING with my brother's kids and give them breaks all the time, just so they can go out or get a good night of sleep. Honestly, I wish I had more time....the DINK lifestyle doesn't suck. But at this point, I don't have time on my side and I fear I won't be able to get pregnant at all. Good luck to all of you!

Its definitely crazy times now but when in history has it not been? if u want them dont let that stop u

My FH and I definitely want children and would be ready for them now, but we would like to travel some more and have some more time just the two of us before we start trying. I think we will reevaluate every 6 months to year and see how we are feeling.

*Side note, there is NO way I would intentionally get pregnant during a pandemic.

My husband and I wanted to have children right away, we already lived together before we got married so we have been able to enjoy our alone time before being married. We have now decided to wait because of COVID 19. I don't feel safe enough to get pregnant and we plan on waiting at least a year and see how everything goes.