CHILDREN at an ADULT Affair!!

On the invite you can put "adult only reception" that isnt that rude. but to put no children is considered bad taste

One way to alleviate any tension this may cause is to arrange for babysitters for out of town couples who may find it hard to travel and leave young children at home. Use people you know and trust of course as babysitters and it may work out for the best!

I also plan on leaving the children out of my wedding with very few exceptions (my little cousin and my fiance's little brother are in the bridal party). One idea that was suggested to me was to hire someone to babysit at the hotel, where you're booking the rooms for you out of town guests. That way they can bring the kids with them and there will be someone to watch them during the reception. And if you hire a responsible teenager from your family, you don't have to pay too much either.

This issue really annoys me! You have every right to not have kids at your wedding. It's insanely rude that people will bring children when the invite is addressed only to them, or also when people just add guests to their RSVP cards. But there is no way around the fact that no matter how you handle this, you will be dealing with some people's egos being hurt. After all, the presence of their perfect precious children should be a blessing and if you aren't thrilled to pay for and trip over them it will be taken as a slap in the face to their parental abilities and general lifestyle. Give me a break! The further along in the wedding planning I go, the less I care about everyone else's fragile egos. I had also thought about offering babysitting services but the cost was ridiculous and I feel that if they have notice and want to come then it is their responsibility. I have a dog whom I have to make arrangements for if I travel, If invited somewhere I don't expect the host to do it for me.

Forget asking politely just say it! People turn into jerks when it comes to weddings & why in the world would people expect you to pay whatever your head cost is $50.-$100 or more when the kid is only going to eat the cake because they don't like the taste of anything else! We had an adult only evening cocktail party with dancing. My husbands brother is now not speaking to us becuse his 6 & 8 yr olds were not invited. He also said if his kids aren't invited don't bother sending an invitation to him............so we didn't! His lose not ours we had a blast & didn't trip over 1 rugrat on the dance floor! I think most people are generally rude and Laura is right no one ever provided me with a free babysitter I always had the commen decency to hire one on my own when my daughter was little & was not invited to an event that I was attending. Good luck & prepare for battle with the people who for some reason don't want a night of adult only fun!LOL

You just write on the rsvp card no kids aloud under this age but if they are teenagers i think thats ok

If you are having an evening wedding, people may not even want to bring their children since it may be past their bedtime.

Make sure you name specific adults on the on invitation. If you are inviting parents but not children, do not address the invite to "The Smith Family", address it to "Mr. and Mrs. Smith".

If people are tacky and return the invitation with children added, call and tell them that you are sorry they misunderstood, but the wedding is going to be an adults only affair and you hope they understand.

It's not rude for you to ask people not to bring children if that's what you want. You can easily be very polite about it, and if people get offended by it then that is their problem.

Oh dear! I never knew this was such an issue considering most weddings have a childrens party, at least for part of the reception. People normally hire clowns, bouncyhouses, child friendly catering and onsite babysitting tucked just out of site of the adult reception. Part of your duty as hostess is to make sure all guests are happy and this is a very easy fix! Although I agree, unless you are coming from far out of town why not get your own sitter and have an adult night out??

That's been a big issue with our wedding planning as well, i don't want children there except for my son but he's not old enough to be running around an causing havic nor would it be allowed...I've had people ask me if i am going to hire a babysitter for kids and the answer is no if the parents can't keep their kids in line at a wedding then they need to find their own babysitter at home...My biggest fear is a kid running into the cake or something else. Everyone who has kids we are inviting is local we are putting on our invitations that it is an adult only reception. imediately family is going to be the only ones with kids and those are the people that are going to keep their children from causing trouble (their young kids)our close friends already said they wouldn't want to bring their children anyway.

It's hard to believe that people would bring their kids...but it does happen.

Be sure to include "Adult Reception" on the invite and if they rsvp with children in mind....don't be afraid to call them.

I love kids, but the last thing I want on my wedding day is to be tripping over the little buggers on the dance floor!

Children at a formal event can be fustrating. The question may be WHY you don't want children at your event. Cost? behavior? or do you have other reasons.

I created my business around this question. Check out my wenbsite and consider if this is an option for you. If not it is YOUR special day, if you and your soon to be husband are in agreement then your desire should be respected and it should be clear on the invitations, this is an Adult affair, a nicer way to say no children allowed.

Good luck to you and congratulations I'm sure whatever you and your fiance decide on your day will be unforgettable and those who are willing to share it will respect your wishes.

sincerly,

Dolores Abreu

I think that if you did not include the children on the invite and then they respond saying they are bringing the kids you should call them and let them know that it is an adult only affair. I really didn't want kids at my wedding either but everyone I know has kids so I decided to hire a babysitter to help keep the kids occupied in another area so that they arent running around crazy. Also if you say no kids expect a lot less people to attend the reception especially if they have more than one child. Just make sure you say that it is an adults only event on the RSVP. Good luck.

We attended a wedding that had young children and babies, and they definitely made a lot of noise during and after the ceremony. Plus, it seemed as though the parents couldn't really enjoy themselves at the reception. The bride and groom seated all the parents-with-babies at a table together, which I think made things even worse.

In light of that, we decided not to have any children at our wedding, and we included "No children, please" on both an insert inside the invitations (that also had the directions to the location, as well as some other notes), and on our wedding website. We also made sure to address the outer envelope to the head(s) of household, then put ONLY the names of the invited people on the inside envelope.

It is not rude at all to request people not bring their children. Hopefully, they will all have enough tact and class to realize that it is an adults-only reception.

Congrats!... You can write "Please note that this is an ADULT-ONLY affair". People should understand. Stating that upfront, gives people time to make sitter arrangements & such. Ist not rude, its your personal preference.

This annoys me as well. We are only inviting adults. We don't have room for children, because we want all our friends there as well as our family (we chose to invite more friends instead of small children we don't even know). We don't have children ourselves, and want to party with grown-ups instead of making the wedding a family affair with childrens activities.

I know some people in my more distant family have a problem with this, but I am trying to convince myself to think that this is OUR day, and not feel bad about the fact that some people would prefer it to be otherwise. Certain aunts in my family are specialized in making me feel bad about things....

You have every right not to want children at your event if that is your preference. Most people for the most part are understanding and in alot of cases would like a night out without the children. You could include the wording "Adult Reception" on your response card and also include the number of guests in parenthesis to help reduce the confusion.

Thanks everyone for your comments. this was really helpful for me, since i was considering kid-rates, myself. BUT, i want it to remain elegant and chic. i cant see that happening with restless kids running about at the hours grow dimmer.... way to put things into perspective!

I feel your frustration. I have 17 cousins, all with children (about 60 total) I'm having a seated dinner, paying about $20 + per person. The caterer offered kids meals at $10 each... too much in my opinion. And my mother (who is paying) flipped out when I suggested having a kiddie table with adults to supervise and entertain. We haven't made any final decisions, but I feel the same as most people who have responded: do what you want. You have good reasons to choose an adult-only reception. You're the host, not your cousin, aunt, or third uncle twice removed. Make it your day.

Congrats! You guys are already married. This is a frustrating topic. FH and I are having a hard time coming to a firm idea on this concept. I think there should be family event. Children should be introduced to these types of rites of passages. However, I agree with the adult only reception part. The children do not need to be at the reception. Ehhhh it's a give or take issue.

I'm so with you on this. I've had friends already ask if their kids will be invited, and I said no with absolutely no guilt! On our website I added a recommendation for childcare.