Chatting with other women?

I really think there is nothing wrong with this situation as you say he does not give you any reason to believe it is more than game talk. My FH is not a gamer in that sense, but he plays Pokémon Go on a daily basis and has groups and chats with people he plays with and some of them are female. 99% of their chats are about the game and I have no reason not to trust him. I think you may be overthinking it and it would be best to talk it out

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I do not have any co-ed friend groups. FH had a good female friend before. I had tried to get to know her and be friends, but she honestly didn't want anything to do with me. So he doesn't talk to her anymore.

I know how much of a wonderful man he is, I just keep letting this little devil talk in my ear. I have gotten better but sometimes it like I take one step forward and two steps back.

Thank you everyone for yall's advice!!

I don’t think anything of it. Depending on the game you don’t have any control on who’s in your team or on your mission. My fiancé games every day and talks to both guys and girls. Sometimes I join him if I’m not sleeping lol (we spend time together at dinner and in the evening but once it hits 9 I’m in bed and he’s streaming).

View Quoted Comment Kicking that little devil aside a lot of hard work. Trust me, I know. Therapy is really helpful to keep you on track and to help you dig out of spirals. I know from my experience, it's tiring to having the voice constantly whispering to you and causing you to doubt yourself. If you aren't already seeing someone I suggest starting to look around and see if there is someone who's a good fit for you.

My husband is a huge gamer and an artist. So he's always talking and schmoozing with a lot of people. When we first starting dating, I would see a lot of women talking with him (and openly flirt) and get nervous. However, after taking some time to see inside his world (going to art gallery openings, hanging out with him while he games, etc.) I could actually see the way his world worked. He didn't bat an eye when they flirted. He didn't even recognize it! It was like they were non-gendered, just peers.

Honestly, it doesn't sound like your FH is doing anything wrong and this is really mainly insecurity that you should work on. I definitely suggest working on your trust issues (if you're not already). That could easily become a huge wedge for you both down the line.

My FH games on Xbox and from time to time there will be women in his party (chat group). As log as they are talking approbriately it dosnt bother me but if she makes me feel uncomfortable I sometimes ask him to mute her so he cant hear her talking anymore. Maybe ask him to do that if it makes you feel uncomfortable. I am a huge jelous type regardless of how much I trust FH. So I try my best to think about it as he has his circle of friends and I have mine. Some of his friends are girls but thats okay because I trust him

My FH plays games a lot on his off time too, I wouldn’t worry about it. If you’re insecure and worried about, pull him in for a little chat and speak to him. Be open in your conversations with him and tell him how you feel about it. If you keep overthinking and hiding it, he won’t know what’s going on..and eventually it’ll all blow out of proportion.

My FH plays Fortnite (less now than a few months ago). He usually plays with his buddies and about a couple of months ago this girl started joining them, they all added her. I'm usually around when he plays Fortnite with her and his buddies, she doesn't have a microphone, so all she can do is chat. I wasn't necessarily cool that she is now on his snapchat, but she knows about me. He'll often mention me while playing the game with her and his buddies. So overall, if you trust him and she knows about you (and respects you), then you shouldn't have anything to worry about. But definitely be honest about your feelings. However, she made a rude comment when he said "the fiance wants me to come to bed" one night, so I'm most likely going to shut that one down. I don't agree with anyone (male or female) talking to my fiance but disrespecting me.

FH and I encountered this early in our relationship. I was upset because I assumed he just played games with guys. But honestly, Have you every listened in on what they say? When FH plays games they are literally only talking about games. He'll get off and I'll ask how so and so is and about x situation, and it's always oh idk we were playing games didn't have time to talk about it.

Depending on the game....they really might not be talking about much of substance.

I do understand where you're coming from. But that insecurity is something you can work on by doing personal development and relationship development. As long as he isn't crossing the line, i think it'd be wrong to ask him not to talk to girls. And again I know how you're feeling because I get anxious and overthink things too, but as other's have said, he will need to have conversations with women on a daily basis regardless.

For me it would depend on the woman, and why they are chatting. I hate when his ex wife wants to chat with him about stupid stuff. Once he sees it's not about their 18 year son and his upcoming graduation he's out. He doesn't encourage it. He would rather never speak to her again if it was up to him! I would probably be uneasy if he was chatting to another woman when it should be me he's chatting with. I would try and find out why

I think I'm always going to listen to my gut, my heart is broken right now.

My fiance is a gamer, he's fine discussing games and whatever on his own.
You sound like you are overreacting. And frankly if a man had made your statement about not having co Ed friend groups I'd tell the woman to get out of there.
You are an adult as is your fiance. You both should, and frankly need to, be able to function with Co Ed settings especially during a hobby. It's not healthy to object to him having normal conversations that involve his hobbies, that's controlling and over stepping boundries.
If he has given you a reason to not trust him then that's different, but if he hasn't given you a reason you are posioning your relationship with a very toxic habit.
Like I said if the situation was inverted I'd be telling you to run from the relationship, do you want to be so suffocating that someone else notices this and gives him that advice? Probably not. Definitely work a lot harder on trusting him.

View Quoted Comment Except it did go very wrong. He sought out the number and secretly texted a third woman from the same game while saying she was an old lady from his work. Like I said, I will keep going with my gut.

If your gut says he's not trust worthy then leave. No use sitting and wasting time being sad when you could spend time with friends or someone you actually trust.