Cancellation

I’m so sorry! As hard as it is now, it’s better now then after the wedding. I can’t believe he betrayed you like that. It must be devastating. I would send out cancellation notices to your guests similar to STD’s. As far as vendors, I would email them ASAP. Good luck!

You may not be looking for sympathy but I'm sending so much your way. I'm heartbroken for you.

We looked into cancellation heavily because of the political climate rn. We asked lots of questions and a majority of my vendors said that written notice meant sending a certified letter saying their services were no longer required.

Good luck ❤️❤️

I am so very sorry. I hope you have a good support system that you can talk to and lean on.

I'd email the vendors and cancel, but ask in the email if they require formal notification via postal mail.

Since you have so few guests who aren't family, they should probably be called, texted, emailed. Do you have a family member or friend who could do this for you? After what you've been through, you don't need deal with any guest reactions. As for family, will word spread naturally, perhaps by mom, dad or a sibling?

I’m very sorry to here this; I would email them or mail them a letter stating “due to unforeseen circumstances we have decided to cancel our reservations...... As for your guest I would do the same... no need to go into detail... I know this is an emotional time but make sure this is what you want to do before you cancel everything

I'm so sorry to hear that at least you dodged a bullet.

I don't see why they would a problem with you emailing them I mean you emailed them to find out if you could have them for a vendor. Are there detailed messages on the contract about it. I still don't see why they just won't let you call and tell them hey I'm not getting married anymore.
Good Luck hun

I’m so sorry this has happened to you...😔 I would let the vendors know ASAP. “Due to unforeseen circumstances we will have to cancel our event.” No need to go into details. If the venue has a contact person I’d send an email and follow up with a formal letter of cancellation. There are wedding cancellation cards that can be sent. Again I’m so sorry. This has to be tough.

I am so sorry you have to deal with this! Definitely better to find out now rather than after you're married. I hope things get better soon.

I've seen another bride that had a similar problem use the wedding as a "single again" party since everything was paid for already. Maybe you can shift vendors around and do something like that? At least you'll get some cake and food.

If that's not something you're up for, immediately tell your vendors you need to cancel and understand deposits and whatnot cannot be returned. I'd have a few family members call/email everyone and tell them the wedding is off. You don't have to explain anything if you don't want to.

Again, I'm so sorry you have to deal with this. I hope things sort out smoothly and you can move along soon.

I would email all of your vendors asap. That way they know that you are cancelling your reservations with them. I would ask in the email if you will need to send a certified letter or if the email is sufficient.
As for your family I would let your parents pass on the word to your family and for your friends I would just let them know due to unforseen circumstances that you will not be able to hold your wedding.

I am sorry you are having to go through this!

If everything is already paid for, you outta just throw a huge bash for yourself and your friends and family. Have the time of your life and leave that guy in the dust.

I'm so sorry, that is so tough. I would send emails and ask for confirmation of receipt, or throw the party and send him the bill. He should pay at least half of the costs. Also, wouldnt give him back the ring, it clearly didn't mean as much to him as it did to you. So sorry you are going through this but so good that you found out before the wedding!

View Quoted Comment ^^ this... and you don’t have to offer any further explanation other than the wedding is off (and your services wil no longer be needed)

View Quoted Comment

At least in Canada, you must return the ring if he paid for it and you don't get married. It's offered in consideration of a binding legal contract, so if you choose not to accept the contract you cannot keep the ring. I don't know if there is a similar rule in the US.

OP, I'm so sorry. All I can say is, whatever this costs, it's cheaper both financially, emotionally, and in terms of time than a divorce. I know it hurts, but at least you have that to hang onto. Please, take care of yourself in whatever way you need to.

All the best in deciding whether to cancel the party or change it into something for yourself. I always said I was going to throw myself a big divorce bash. I never did, but it could have been a lot of fun. If you choose to cancel, I would send out written cancellation notices to your guests, something like an Unsave the Date just to let them know the wedding is cancelled. Any gifts that you've received will also need to be returned to the givers.

I am so sorry this is happening to you. That is devastating. I would contact all vendors you have booked and notify them that you're cancelling the wedding, All they need to know is that it is cancelled. Then ask them if they require any kind of formal written notice/contract. Get the initial notification out to them first by email or phone and then ask them how you should follow-up and what the whole process is after this.

I agree with other people who said to send out a card or "unsave the date" in the mail to your guests. That would probably be the best and easiest way to contact everyone. Texting or social media messaging can get messy and phone calls might not get returned.

I would say that if you have to pay full amount even if you're not having a wedding either just use it as a party for you and your friends or donate the paid time slot and services to another bride

I will still have a party!

View Quoted Comment No, there’s no such rule in the US. Most courts have agreed the engagement ring is considered a gift.

I am so sorry!

i would send certified letters just stating that you are sorry but the wddinghas been cancelled and their services are no longer needed. That way you have covered your rear. Even if you sent an email and they received it, this method could cause you issues down the road.

As for the people that you sent STD’s to....more than likely word of mouth will reach them that the wedding is cancelled. If you like you could send a note, either by mail or email, stating that the wedding has been cancelled.

I wish you well!

Best of luck OP, you have received great advice on how to officially cancel.

May I add, that he should be paying his part too, and I personally would take him to court if you are the one left making these vendors whole. Keep all the receipts and emails and what not tied to the wedding to figure out the financials.

I’m so sorry this has happened to you! It would be too difficult to stay emotionally calm trying to cal each vendor to talk about canceling and what fees or penalties would need to be paid. I’d just send them an email.

View Quoted Comment This depends on the state, but many states consider an engagement ring a conditional gift that must be returned if the engagement is broken.

OP, I am so sorry you're going through this. I'm sure a lot of things are going through your mind, but be sure to take a step back and take care of yourself and let others take care of you. For the logistics, I would suggest that especially if invitations haven't gone out that you let it lie and let a few key people in your circle let people know if it comes up. I personally wouldn't want to go through the act of putting all that together, and people would surely understand. You don't have to explain yourself to anyone including your vendors. As PP said, check with them as to what constitutes written notice and check if there's any provision if they are able to rebook the date.