Can i fire a bridesmaid? HELP!

I would drop her.. she obviously isn't interested in it and if she was talking that badly about her i am sure she is going the same to you.

Planning your wedding is stressful but it is also supposed to be fun. Your BM are also the one's that are supposed to be there for you during all the stress, not cause it. I, personally, would "fire" her. If you really don't want to fire her then I would just have an honest talk with her.

It's tough dealing with people like that i'm sorry ...it kinda sounds like she wants a way out of the wedding though maybe. just try and have a real talk with her...i know it's so much easier said then done tho. but you don't need this stress!

I was tempted to fire my MOH many many times, but I think you have an actual case. You should say something to her about the way she talked about the other bride. If she could make you think she is talking behind your back, you don't need that stress. Especially if she is also not helping. My qualm with my MOH was that she would never help.

Just say like "go ahead and start your family. best wishes. I don't want u to be spending this amount of money on a BM dress while u r saving up for baby, etc."

if she uses baby as an excuse, use her baby as an excuse to fire her

That's a really tough situation to find yourself in. I experienced this myself despite only choosing a tiny handful of people and thinking this would neverrr happen to me. The least likely person that I would have ever thought would have an issue, had a major issue with idk me getting married I guess bc she started treating me different and being difficult literally the day I got engaged. While you will hear plenty of people tell you that BM's arent hired help and you cannot "fire" one and that you are an awful person for doing so and BM's only have to buy a dress and show up, only you know how your friendship with this person has changed and how willing you are to put up with the stress of the situation. My other two BM's were thrilled when the stress of dealing with the problematic person was removed. So there is that to consider also.

Well, she is not your employee, so no, you cannot fire her.

I would sit down and have a conversation with her and see what is going on. If you try to unilaterally drop her, be prepared to lose the friendship as well.

You're getting married in August 2015...and she says she will be pregnant? Based on her getting pregnant this month..but you say that's not happening anymore.. weird

Ummm yes I fired one of my bridesmaids and my original MOH. It's your day not hers and u went our of your way to think long and hard about who u want in your wedding if she's acting like that drop her!!!! $

1. I call troll. 2. Ok, fire her she'll be fat in your pics anyway.

So this woman isn't actually your friend to begin with?

You can do whatever you want. It's your wedding amirite?

Change your avatar so people won't think you're a troll.

It sounds like your BM didn't want to be in your wedding in the first place. Are you really friends or just acquaintances because she dates your FH's brother? I agree with Ally, just try to have a real conversation with her and let her know that she doesn't have to be in the wedding anymore (since she is trying to expand her family). I feel like she has been waiting for you to say it anyway.

When you reach out to her is it only to talk about the wedding? If not, I would address that issue first. If you think she doesn't want to be in the wedding, that should be what you discuss with her; this woman is going to be part of your life long term; she is the mother of your FH's niece (after the wedding your niece). As such you may want to think long and hard about "firing" her from your wedding. I can tell you that aside from my mother, FMIL and sister/MOH, no one wanted to hear about the wedding until about a month ago (about 2 months out from the wedding). Even my mom, FMIL and sister only got involved with my dress selection and the cake tasting. You have time until your wedding, you may want to save wedding planning discussions here (we all understand and are happy to listen and offer advice/suggestions).

I'm asking you if she's your actual friend?

The way you talk about her, she's not. You do have a very long time until your wedding, so there's a high chance of people not giving a rat's behind presently. But she also doesn't really seem like your friend based on what you say.

No, Alicia, I am 90% positive you are a troll. What is up with this and your island post...really?

To the people who keep saying people are trolls? really? I have read this so many times in the last two weeks. You know you can't do anything with pictures right now. I choose not to upload my picture, I am not a troll, I am a person getting married just like you.

Why do people have to be so mean, just because someone asked a question you don't like, why not just not answer it or move on.

I know the issue of firing a bridesmaid can become a hot topic here, but I just wanted to share my experience and hopefully it'll help you make the decision best for YOU.

I had a bridesmaid that I was very, very close to, but things happened, stuff fell through, she vanished! She started bailing on things early, making excuses for everything, and would never reply back. It got to the point where FH and I had a serious discussion about having her attend as a guest instead, but I have too big of a heart to let down a friend, so we didn't.

Long and behold, 2 and a half months before my wedding after I had paid for everything for her including dress, hair, makeup, and personalized gifts, she bailed on ME. And now I'm hitting myself over the head on why I didn't drop her when it originally came up, because now I'm down $500 on a friend that ended up not being dependable.

I definitely think you should talk to her first. See where she stands. Hopefully it works out for you .

I would recommend talking to her, if she is looking for a way out of being the bridesmaid she will take the out. It is your day, only have people you want in your wedding.

When stuff defies rational, logical behavior, people question if the person truly exists. I guess you're more accustomed to dealing with insanity? I don't know. It's as Judge Judy always says "If it doesn't make sense, it's not true."

Val--you, also, have the choice to move on from stuff you don't like. If you don't like negativity, then don't try and reprimand people because you're contributing to it.