Can a wedding guest make a seating request

It sounds like you haven't had contact with this woman in years. Do you have other mutual friends with the couple getting married who were invited to the wedding? I'm willing to bet that the couple is more likely to seat you by people they know you spend time with and talk to rather than someone who they realize isn't in your social circle.

If it was her ex then she has nothing to do with. I think you should suck it up and not bother her with it. I mean it's not like the woman did the actual stealing.

Thank you for all the advise. There is a character limit, so I just gave the main point of issue, but in my defense this woman has done a lot more to hurt others I care about and I get a little over protective of my people where I get feisty against anyone who has done them wrong (I know that's not wedding behavior). I just worry that because we went to college together that the bride will just organize tables that way and stick us together without thinking about it, which is why I'm worried about the seating. Thank you for confirming what I thought. I have to deal with it no matter what happens. I am just a little anxious about the confrontation and needed the emotional support. The other thing I get nervous about is this woman is a drug addict (why items were stolen, for drugs), and I don't know what may happen, because I don't know if she's off drugs or not.

If anyone has a good comment for me to say to the woman, I'd appreciate it. Here's the situation I might be in is that she will try to ignore everything and talk to me like we are good friends from college (the majority of the bad things she did were to friends, but not me, so I'm worried she thinks we're ok, even though she's hurt a lot of people who I love, which is not ok by me). I rarely complain, so I'm nervous the bride will seat her with me, knowing most other college friends can't stand this woman. If she tries to be my friend, without stressing the bride, what is the nice wedding way to say please don't talk to me, I don't want to be fake or cause drama?

"Don't talk to me."

There really is no nice way to say it. "Don't talk to me, please."

"I'm sorry I really don't have anything to say to you at this point in my life."

"I'm still hurt about what happened in [month/year/college/whatever]. I would appreciate if you left me alone."

ETA: just keep in mind that depending on her viewpoint of the situation and where is she now with her life, this could result in an argument.

If I were you, I would just talk civilly with her if it happens. I don't have to like someone to make inane small talk, and you don't either. It's just one night with limited interaction. Just deal with it like adults do all the time.

You know the wedding isn't about you, right? Why are you anticipating a fight? Or even being at the same table?

Unless this happened last week, you're giving it way too much thought.

People are seated at their tables at my wedding for about 45 minutes. You can get up and move after that. Regarding what you say to her, I think even though you've been burned by this woman, you can still try to find some empathy. If you think to yourself, "Oh, there's so-and-so. I feel bad that she seems to still be struggling with drugs. I hope she gets better soon," maybe this sentiment will inform what you can say to a person who probably needs a friend.

Also, if this woman is invited to your friend's wedding, isn't she your friend's friend, at the very least? One of my best friends has friends that I don't like for various reasons, but I would never say "don't talk to me."

You be nice and polite because it is your friend's wedding. Is that being fake? No, that's just you or causing a scene. Just be nice and say thing like "isn't is a beautiful day", "doesn't the bride look great", "hope you have been doing well".

It wasn't even her who stole? Either we're missing something here, or I don't get why you're so upset with this woman who did nothing but marry a thief and then divorce him? Maybe you should sit next to her and rekindle whatever friendship you once had. You can't blame her forever for what her ex did....

I agree with @Celia, you are making this about you. Just ignore her, it is not that hard.

I had to deal with a similar situation recently. I attended the wedding of a friend from HS. Another girl we went to school with was also at the table. We use to all be good friends, but SR year this other girl and I had a big falling out over something very nasty and childish this girl did to me. I no longer am friends or have contact with that person.

I was annoyed at having to be at the same table, and the girl was trying hard to be friendly and act like we were all still close even thoughI hadn't spoken to her in five years. You know what I did?

I was polite and cordial to her because I am an adult and can handle being at a table with someone I don't like for half an hour.

I don't understand, I'm sorry.

And you're going to this wedding because....??

ETA: nevermind. I'm thinking you are a plus one.

I had a guest that asked H about who she was seated with. It wasn't a big deal to us to seat her somewhere else.

It really isn't that hard to just act civil and polite. The day is not about you and it should be easy enough to avoid the woman for most of the night.

I dk, i think this is just overblown. This is a social situation, not a confrontation. It's not appropriate to rehash past drama when the focus is supposed to be on the bride and groom. Smile through gritted teeth if you have to, but don't make this about you. If she is friendly towards you, just be friendly back. It's not like you actually talk or are legitimate friends, so who cares? If during the wedding she tries to bring up the past, just say, "I'd rather not discuss this right now, I'm here for Bride and Groom."

I think you should just get over it and suck it Up. A seating chart is already difficult enough without worrying about this type of crap.