Cake & Punch Etiquette

Personally, I think evening weddings should always have a meal. Or enough food to equal a meal (heavy apps and stations). If you’re going to do this, I wouldn’t have the ceremony start any earlier than 8.

View Quoted Comment Just about every forum said to several a meal at dinner time. But after speaking with this woman who said she did cake & punch in the evening I was curious if there was a evening/dessert version of cake & punch

Would you have a lot of out of town guests? I would definitely want it to be clear on the invitations if you did this.

View Quoted Comment No. Everyone is local. And there are only 25 guest.

I can't speak for everyone else but 8pm is considered dinner time for me. But I would be fine with a few heavy appetizers and dessert in place of a full blown meal as long as it was stated clearly on the invite and wedding website.

If your wedding was at 7pm That means I would be getting ready over dinner time and would be starving come time for the reception at 8pm. So If your wedding is a weekend I could make it work and just eat dinner really early but if its on a friday I would 100% expect to be fed a full meal as I would have to work at least half a day and then spend that time getting ready rather then eating.

Also my Fiance and I regularly eat dinner at 7pm so I personally would be pretty hungry as that is close to dinner time for me. I think it could work but you would need to basically serve heavy apps and enough food to replace a meal which defeats the purpose.

I think the caterer is leading you astray with what she did for her own wedding, unless I'm reading that wrong. I agree with PPs that cake and punch really should be a midday celebration, even if it is for 25 guests.

I'm surprised that a venue would suggest this at all unless it was a weekday. It's usually much more cost effective for you and them to have it midday, because they can still use the space for an evening wedding later that day.

View Quoted Comment I usually eat late as well so I understand where you're coming from. So yes, the invitatation will say "light refreshments to follow" in place of "reception to follow".

I agree that I like a meal. However if it is stated on the invite that it is appetizers (heavy ones!) and dessert it should be fine. Is there a reason you are unable to have a meal? Lots of apps plus dessert could cost the same as some meals.

View Quoted Comment The venue didn't have everything we were looking for and my fiance jokingly made a comment about foregoing the entire reception and giving everyone a lunchable after the ceremony and us going directly to the airport which made the lady respond, that's basically what she did. Then she went into detail that it was a late night punch & cake ceremony that she doesn't regret. Not that the venue would have had anything to do with these plan. At that time, I brushed it off and continue looking for other venues. But now, it doesn't seem like a bad idea 🤣

View Quoted Comment After looking into so many different options, we decided a "wedding" isn't a necessity. We're a blended family of 7 and decided we'd rather use the money as a down payment on our home than for a 1day wedding (especially since we're paying for everything). So plan b is to have a court house ceremony then a photographer in the park during sunset. But then the cake &punch idea just came to mind so I came here for opinions.

View Quoted Comment It would be for 2hours on a Saturday evening. So from your response, it seems like that ok.

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I mean it would be better then a weekday for sure, and I personally could make it work. But I work a traditional 9-5, m-f job. Which isn't actually that common anymore, a lot of people do not work that traditional style schedule, even my fiance who works in corporate management works on weekends occasionally. So it would really be pushing it to only offer "Light refreshments" Most people eat dinner between 6-8pm, and so you would really need to provide heavy apps and desserts which can cost just as much if not more to have an evening cake & punch reception. Just because you can technically get away with something or make it work - doesn't mean you should. And is the phrase "Get away with..." Something you want tied to your wedding and your guests memories of it?

I think you could get away with it as others have said if you do heavy appetizers-- so not just cheese crackers and veggies and punch. Otherwise I would have the wedding early afternoon so people don't expect food. You could look into various sandwiches, salads, soups also to use as fillers

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TBH plan B sounds way less stressful and less expensive.

I would do this

I've been to a cake and punch reception. It was only an hour and pretty cool. If you choose this, just make it less than 2 hours

I think cake & punch receptions are more suitable for the afternoon. Is there a reason you can not have an afternoon wedding?

View Quoted Comment No. But we want to take our pictures at sunset which doesn't happen until late in September in PA

View Quoted Comment It probably will be. I over estimate so 2hour max after the ceremony, pix, hugs & thank yous.

View Quoted Comment I see you point... Nothing has been set in stone. So thanks for giving me another view of it.