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Nicole
Savvy November 2018

Buffer time for start of Ceremony?

Nicole, on April 4, 2018 at 10:51 AM Posted in Planning 0 34

Hi there,

Have a fairly specific question - sorry in advance for being so wordy Smiley winking

Is anyone else thinking of adding some buffer time to their ceremony start time, in case of tardiness (not necessarily your own, but that of notoriously late guests)?

I live in South Florida and we have quite a few guests that run on "island" time LOL, myself included! I'm trying to keep a tight timeline, 4:30 ceremony, 5-6 cocktail hour, and 6-10pm reception.

Since the venue has these gorgeous, big windows that overlook the golf course and a small lake, I'd like to ensure that we have a good bit of daylight coming through them during the first part of the reception. The sunset through the windows are supposed to be stunning, according to our catering coordinator.

We are getting married on November 3 of this year, which is the same evening that clocks get set back, so it's literally the last day of the year that we'll have an extra hour of sunlight, making the sunset around 6:30pm.

Do you think I'm ok keeping it at 4:30, even if we have to push back to 4:45/4:50pm start time?

Than you in advance!


34 Comments

Latest activity by Chelsea, on April 4, 2018 at 4:36 PM
  • Anna
    Expert June 2019
    Anna ·
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    I'm putting 5pm on invitations with a 5:30 ceremony time. So hopefully most guests will arrive around 5pm.
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  • Nicole
    Savvy November 2018
    Nicole ·
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    Alternatively, I'm teetering on making the start time 4pm instead.
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  • The Nuptials
    VIP July 2018
    The Nuptials ·
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    I have never seen a ceremony start on time personally, here in the dc area, they are always a few minutes late and it has been 100% the fault of the guests. We won't start a ceremony with 50% attendance, that just won't work, I mean you could that you will have a steady stream of people coming in or standing in the back and photos will be awful.

    We are doing cocktails at 5:30pm and ceremony at 6pm. The invitation lists both times.

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  • FutureMrsR
    VIP May 2018
    FutureMrsR ·
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    So we're in a similar situation. We have the space for a very limited time for ceremony and photos afterward, and FH's family tends to run on the late side. Additionally, we can't access the space early, and I didn't want people sitting around in their cars before the ceremony as my family tends to be super early. I solved both problems by writing on my invites: "Seating to begin at 1 p.m. // Ceremony to begin at 1:15 p.m." I'll be walking in at 1:15 sharp!

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  • Jeleebeenz
    VIP September 2015
    Jeleebeenz ·
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    Please don't do this. The overwhelming majority of your guests will be on time and shouldn't be penalized for a few latecomers. ALL 4 of my girls went down the aisle exactly on time because we planned in a very detailed and tight manner. My BFF was late for #2's wedding. Not going to penalize our other guests for that.

    I arrive a solid 20 minutes early for a wedding. I shouldn't have to wait an additional 15-30 minutes because you built a buffer for the latecomers.

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  • P
    Master April 2018
    Powers2 ·
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    No I wouldn't do this. You are punishing the guests that are on time by making them wait. If these guests are late, then they are late. Their issue, not yours.


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  • muriel
    Champion June 2018
    muriel ·
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    Your invitations should state the time that the ceremony will actually start. You need to remember that if you put a 4:30 start time, guests will start arriving even before 4:00 pm. That means getting ready and traveling earlier.

    If I arrived for a 5:00 pm wedding, and later found out you had no intention of starting until 5:30, I would be pissed. Why would you consider my time so invaluable that you would plan for me to sit and do nothing for an extra half hour?

    You should be ready to start on time. Don't punish the majority of your guests by making them wait for someone who can't manage to arrive on time. Latecomers can grab a seat at the back.


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  • Nicole
    Savvy November 2018
    Nicole ·
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    Hmmm, I like the idea of offering a cocktail for those guests arriving early. I do have some very punctual family members on my mother's side. I just didn't want them to get restless waiting half hour. We're also thinking of having a mariachi band for the cocktail hour (my FH is of Mexican heritage), so maybe I can even have them play for the arrival, to make the wait time a little livelier for those that arrive on time.

    Either way, sounds like I may be better off stating 4pm on the invitation, so that we're done with ceremony and cocktail hour before 6:30 and sunset.
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  • Mrs. Fall Bride
    Master October 2016
    Mrs. Fall Bride ·
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    Yes, we had an invite time, and then a planned ceremony start time that was 30 minutes later. Our guests were greeted with drinks upon arrival. It's a very UO on WW, but completely standard and requested by venues in my region. I've never been to a wedding that started at the time on the invite, there's always a buffer. If you are going to add a buffer, I suggest having some drinks/refreshments available as they arrive.

    The sun was setting around 6:20pm on our wedding day, so we had an invite time of 5pm, ceremony 5:30-6, cocktail hour 6-7, reception 7-11. We did a first look and all pictures before the ceremony, and that allowed us to have it outside in full daylight, but still late enough that we could get some post-ceremony photos as the sun was setting. The last hour before the sun sets or rises is called "the golden hour" and is considered the best natural light for photography. So the timeline I used could work well for you.

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  • Janice
    Devoted July 2018
    Janice ·
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    If you’re putting 4, I wouldn’t start any later than 4:15. Guests could potentially be sitting there for an hour if they start to arrive at 3:30. That’s way too long.
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  • OG Kathryn
    Champion May 2016
    OG Kathryn ·
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    I would be absolutely pissed if i found out about this after waiting around 30 minutes to a hour. You dont need to accommodate late people, if they are late they miss it. Most people prioritize a wedding higher then meeting up for dinner. Please dont do this. Its extremely rude to punish the majority for the few.

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  • Nicole
    Savvy November 2018
    Nicole ·
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    My only concern is that it might be a good chunk. A few late comers is one thing, but I'd hate to have pictures with a lot of empty seats, and people standing in the back. I've been to quite a few south Florida weddings in which there was a decent amount of people that arrived almost 20 minutes after the stated start time. :/
    Or they arrived at the designated time on invitation, but still took an additional 5-10 minutes getting from their car to their seat.

    I need butts in seats at 4:30, so I might just make the timeline clear on invitation that Ceremony start time is 4:30pm.

    And then make some calls and texts to those I know that often run late and tell them ceremony start time does not mean arrival time, and I'm starting with or without them lol. I had a friend do that to all her typical tardy guests, in a light hearted way. She even joked that ceremony doors will be closed at 5pm and venue staff was instructed not to open them till the end. Of course I later found out that she's having the ceremont outside and there are no doors lol.
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  • OG Kathryn
    Champion May 2016
    OG Kathryn ·
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    That's crazy, i have never witnessed that. Ive never had a wedding start more then 15 minutes after the invite time. Even that people were getting antsy.

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  • Michelle
    VIP September 2018
    Michelle ·
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    Yes! My FHs cousins are always late to everything so I know we need a buffer time. We’re playing a slideshow of photos of us growing up that will start at 4:05 (time on the invite that the ceremony starts is 4). It should last about 5 mins. I’m hoping by then everyone will be seated and ready to go. Then we have seating of the parents, then we go down
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  • T
    Devoted September 2018
    Tara ·
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    30 minutes seems like a long time. We're doing a 15 minute buffer, since guests will have to walk from the parking lot to the actual ceremony location.
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  • Cassie
    Super April 2018
    Cassie ·
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    We are not doing a buffer at all. We put the start time is 11am. That is the time we will start walking down the aisle. I would hope people know to be seated by that time.

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  • O
    Master October 2017
    O ·
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    I wouldn't do that. My ceremony start time was 6pm. All my guests and family arrived 45minutes early, a few an hour early. We had drinks waiting for them. We started on time. We let it known we weren't waiting for anyone to start. If they missed it, they missed it.
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  • Casey
    VIP December 2018
    Casey ·
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    I always show up 30 minutes early to weddings...I would be so pissed if I were your guest.

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  • Mrs. Fall Bride
    Master October 2016
    Mrs. Fall Bride ·
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    Yup, it's usually 30 minutes, but has been as much as an hour at a couple we attended. I'm honestly not bothered by it at all, especially if drinks are available.

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  • Nicole
    Savvy November 2018
    Nicole ·
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    Yeah, I've been to a 2-3 weddings in the last 2 years that started at least 15 min after the stated time on the invitation.

    In my experience no one seemed pissed, at least that I was aware of, at those weddings. We mainly just chit chatted and caught up with one another. It was like another opportunity to mingle with old faces before the cocktail hour. I would say the majority arrived maybe 15 early, so 30 min total wait time. And there were no cocktails available pre-ceremony.

    My ceremony will be outside with no coverage, though - so I really don't want to do that to people, for that reason. Even though it will be November, it's South Florida, it might still be warm at 4pm.

    After hearing both sides, and knowing we'll be on a tight timeline, I think maybe personally suggesting a 4pm-4:15 arrival time to those late comers in advance, and then reiterating the 4:30 ceremony start time, might be the best route for me. I don't want to take a chance any of the early arrivers will get pissed, and I don't want to start late and miss the daylight hours.

    Thank you for the responses!!


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