BS RSVP Excuses

To be fair, no one actually has to provide a reason not to come to your wedding. Take a step back, and enjoy the people that do show up. Life is too short to be bitter and angry over stupid shit.

Ugh. Why is it so difficult for people to RSVP??? It's a freakin wedding, not a birthday party!

I am dreading this part of planning. It would irritate me to get excuses, too. Just simply send back the RSVP with a decline, instead of making me hound you and then feeding me needless excuses. If you said no the first time, you wouldn't have to explain. Womp womp.

FWIW, I just had to go around to my squad and hound everyone who didn't respond to my email last week. I even titled it "Free Food!" To click bait them to opening/reading it. I'm planning a squad pizza party and need an accurate headcount. I even gave them a voting button in the email. All they had to do was open, read three sentences, click yes or no. I had a 17% response rate as of today and the party is tomorrow. ANNOYING.

@JessieJV That's my entire point. I don't want to hear an excuse (mostly because they just end up feeling more hurtful). I just want them to decline or accept and leave it alone.

People suck.

I'm in a similar boat...we are waiting to hear back from about 20 people still now. At the point where we will start calling in the next week or so. Some people who I expected would definitely come aren't for stupid reasons like work. They had a year to take off. So that does hurt in some ways. other people that I didn't expect to come, which is a nice surprise! Still my feelings are if they cared enough to make it a priority they would be there. I

I'm with @Kate about reminding myself that I'm saving money. I received a decline last night that stung like a bitch. I know why they're declining, as she had verbally told me they would be, and I can't say I understand (or would do the same in their position). It sucks, but just because we would do it differently, doesn't mean they have to. So, I'm just thinking about the $$$ that is staying in my pocket, because I've got enough going on without letting it drag me down.

@RaeGin Yea, I do like the whole saving money thing.

@Kate True that.

@Richard That's terrible I'm sorry

I'm dreading this as well. It really baffles me as to why people can't rsvp properly.

I understand OP. we had some declines that definitely stung-- especially after FH and I had made a considerable effort to attend their weddings. but we are trying to focus on those who are coming and enjoy our time with them.

I feel the same way, it's like hearing what's more important than your wedding, and that definitely hurts if it's from someone you really thought would come.

Someone told FH they weren't coming to my shower so we put them down as a no, then a couple days ago they said they'll try to come or that they might just show up if they're able... I was like ".... I put you down as a no..." If RSVP annoyances are already happening for the shower I can't wait for the wedding ones!

I understand how this is annoying. If nothing else, it will tell you who your real friends are.

My worst was not even a decline - it was friends of DH texting me (not him) the day before the wedding to say that there was some convention / gathering in their town and there were no available flights and his SO couldn't get off work cos she is a nurse.

Which is totally fine.

Except for: why are you only asking to be off work the day before, and why are you only booking flights the day before, and why would you text me instead of calling your friend.

I mean, I have literally met him once and I don't even know why he has my number.

Ugh, guess I am still a bit bitter.

Yeah I agree, this has been the most stressful part for us as well. We get married on Sept. 16, which happens to be Mexican Independence Day, so there's this huge fight on TV that night. People keep talking about this big fight and that they're planning on leaving my wedding early to watch this on TV. It's not a huge deal, but it's just annoying to hear.

@Melissa We have the same date and we're in a similar boat. My FH and I are waiting to hear back from 45 people still. We never anticipated having to call this many people considering we addressed and stamped the envelopes so all they would have to do is put it in their mailbox after checking yes or no. I am not excited to hear the excuses we get considering some of the people who haven't responded have known when we are getting married for over a year now.

We have just decided to look at it as money saved that we can add some things with that we weren't able to before.

I love the fact that were getting married on a military base. If you dont rsvp, you cannot come to the wedding. Period. I have to have my guest list turned in 2 weeks prior for security clearance on every single guest.

I'm in that same boat. I'm in that "why didn't we just elope? No one cares " phase. But I agree with a previous poster to just enjoy the process and Your day!

My FH's step-grandmother is not attending our wedding. She claims she'll be out of state, but his stepmom told us to not bother inviting her because she wouldn't come unless we invited his stepmom's sister who I've never met. The sister is basically a thief and takes advantage of the grandmother. His stepmom said she would lie and say it was a small guest list, but we invited ~100 people, and we didn't want it to get out later that she wasn't invited, so we invited her anyways. I felt bad for my FH because I don't feel his grandmother treats him like a grandson, and I think it stung a little that she would refuse to come because we wouldn't invite a thief. That's really my one and only gripe with our RSVPs, aside from people claiming they sent it a week before the deadline and it shows up 3 days after with the postmark for the day we called them, haha.

My rsvp by date is next weekend and I still haven't heard anything from like 75 people!!! :,( I hate this rsvp process it is so stressful.

I am really nervous about reaching out to people. Like if they say no I feel like that will be so awkward. And I think it's normal for people to feel like they need to give an excuse. It's weird to just say "no I'm not coming." It would all be avoided if they'd just rsvp!!