Brother's gf's sister and family wants to come!!

Can you accommodate one more person? I know the assumption is what probably what has you riled (i would be too).

The question is, would it cause more problems to turn her down than to just add one additional person? It's very rude and presumptuous of them but it could really cause extra problems if you put your foot down

My sister's boyfriend/baby daddy will be invited, but not his family. That is unnecessary.

I feel like this entire time i have spent too much of my time and energy accommodating my parents' wishes on the guest list. I wanted to put my foot down for this one to show that enough is enough and the fact that they assumed it would be okay to even ASK if she can come baffles me. I am livid. But it always goes the same way, I get guilt tripped and say sure, i would rather be upset than cause more drama. If it comes down to that, i am expecting my parents to pay for the their entire guests not just the "add-ons". Is that being reasonable and accommodating?

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If you tell them to pay for their guest lists, I bet their guest list will suddenly shrink.

Yes - I think you should ask them to pay for extras if you can accommodate. We are doing that with our parents - however it got to the point that the extras were going to put us over a threshold to need more bartenders, tables, etc, so we did cut them off even though they wanted to pay for more people.

I completely understand about not wanting to start drama - I have come up against that issue a lot in planning!

AthenaKay- yea, my reaction exactly.

Precious- not really, to my surprise as well. They just make me look like a b*tch for asking them to do that. It's happened before during the initial gathering of the guest list. This time i will just put my foot down with that...and will probably suck it up even if it doesnt happen.

MG- thats a good point, i need to look into that number. Im thinking of having my parents pay for everyone on their list, not just the add ons. This is ridiculous and its not fair that im the one suffering

How old is the sister? I would not invite her. They've been dating for a year, but they're NOT engaged, these people are NOT actually future in-laws!! For that reason, I would not invite the sister.

Same age as me. Old enough to be responsibly go sight seeing on her own.

Umm no. "Sorry, we would love to have her, but we're at capacity for the venue."

I totally get where your coming from and I would feel the same way. However I think this is one of those it's not worth the battle and you should just let her come.

It really depends on who's paying for the wedding. You ? Or your parents?? If they're helping with more than 50% she should be invited, if it's just you and FH paying then you can say no. Sorry.

My parents invited my sisters' bf parents (parents paying for most our wedding )no way would any siblings be invited though, cause one, I don't even know who the heck they are and there's like a bunch of them.

Why would they think they can add on the expense of this sister if they aren't going to pay for it? or remove someone that you are paying for?

as for them trying to make you feel bad, that's just them being manipulative.

guests list often come down to how many can fit into the budget, so if they want to insist on her coming let them pay for it.

We are paying for the wedding ourselves. FH's family is covering the open bar they requested, my parents were supposed to pay the add on people's food expense. But now I am going to make them pay for the add on people's open bar, food, chairs/tables, linens and everything that goes into inviting these strangers. Im also thinking about making them pay for the food for their entire guests just because I can and I am pissed. What makes me more livid is the fact that the brother's gf's family is going behind my back and talking to my mom about it. What makes them so bold and stupid, I do not know. I, however can do everything I can to make them regret their decision for both the gf's family and my parents. At this point I dont care if I sound or look like a bridezilla to them. Any ideas on making their lives miserable is very much appreciated.

Deep breaths. I understand your frustrations, it really is inconsiderate of them but lets try to rise above it. Making their lives miserable may cause a rift and unnecessary drama and wedding planning is stressful enough.

Just apologize again and explain again that as much as you would love to invite everyone the venue is at capacity and you have no more room to accommodate anyone. If they keep bringing it up simply calmly and clearly restate your position and change the subject. Eventually they will realize that having this conversation gets them no where and they will drop it. You just have to stay firm.

If they're not paying, then you call the shots. I would kindly do what Fluffy suggested, "would love her to be there, but we're at capacity" #sorrynotsorry

I don't understand who asks to come to someone's wedding. My aunt "told me" she was bringing her husband's brother along with she and her husband, "put us down for 3" she said. I barely know her husband and have never EVER met his brother. Um, no. He's not coming, but thanks for wanting him to?? Who are these people? lol

No. I don't get it, honestly.