Bridesmaids shoes, who pays?

As a bridesmaid, I expect to cover the cost of my outfit, including shoes. On the flip side, I expect the bride to be reasonable in her requests. In my opinion, any black dress + any red shoes are very reasonable requests. If you want to pay, it's a nice gesture, but I think it's fine if you don't.

I agree if they are nude or black shoes that you are requiring (a specific color not specific shoe) then you don't have to pay. Premise being they most likely have that already and it up to them to buy a new pair if they want to. I own a lot of shoes and do not have single red pair, so it is an odd color, if thats what you want then you should have to pay for them. Please please don't use that as a "gift". The last wedding I was in my gifts were, black shoes i'll never wear again, a white shawl i'll never wear again, and a bridesmaid bracelet that i'll never wear again. They were all mandatory items for that day and now just taking up space.

I would never wear red shoes again, and I'd be bothered if I had to buy a dress and then some shoes that I will never wear again. I've never heard of a bride buying attire, but I've also never had a friend require specific shoes. Seriously, nobody cares what shoes the bridesmaids have on.

I told my girls to choose between nude or gold as a collective group (I liked gold better, but figured every one had nude- I didn't tell them this, it was just my thought process). They all unanimously said they preferred gold with the dress. I told them literally any gold shoe- heel, sandal, etc. They are paying themselves. Just make sure they have an affordable option and I think you're good!

They paid for their own. I just asked that they wear gold heels for pictures and the ceremony and then they could change into whatever they wanted.

I think that if you are asking for a general color/type it should be ok for your BM to pay for them, if you want a specific shoe then you should pay for them. The weddings I have been in we were given options like wear any gold shoe or any cowboy boot. I found a great deal on a shoes that I thought went perfectly with the girls dresses so I decided to buy them for my BMs.

I've had to buy my own dress, shoes, and pay for hair and makeup in every wedding I've ever been in. As a bridesmaid I wouldn't be offended if I had to buy shoes. I would actually expect that. Asking them to wear any red shoe isn't asking too much.

My ladies asked me what shoes I wanted them to wear. I agree bridesmaids should purchase their own shoes but the bride should be reasonable in her request. Red shoes is reasonable imo.

My bridesmaids are paying for their own shoes, I did request for them to wear silver shoes but they bought them.

In every wedding I've been in, I was expected to buy the dress and shoes, and I honestly anticipated that from the beginning anyway. My bridesmaids are doing the same, however I've only asked that they are champagne gold - style is up to them. At least half of them already have champagne gold shoes, so I don't feel bad about this request at all.

For the last wedding that I was in, I had to wear champagne gold shoes, and I remember thinking I probably wouldn't wear them much at all after that...but I actually have. Way more than I expected to.

I don't think "any red shoe" is an unreasonable request, especially since you're letting them pick their dresses and hello, they're black! Who can't find a cheap black dress if they need to, or doesn't wear a black dress again? This fact I feel makes it even more justifiable that you require a specific shoe color, even if it is red and even if some of them may never wear them again.

Who even notices the shoes the bridesmaids are wearing?

In the past 20 years being a bridesmaid has shifted from being an honor to a burden. Bridesmaids tend to shoulder that burden gladly because they (we assume) love you and are close to you. Your job as the bride is to respect them (because they are you closest friends, we assume) and make that burden as small as possible. If that includes helping them afford their dress and shoes then so be it. Use your brain and decide what's right.

Um, not that she'll see it from the first page, but to Audrey, who said this:

"When I agree to be a bridesmaid, I think ok there goes shoes and a dress I'll never wear again. "

And you're just totally OK with treating your friends like that? REALLY?!

Wow, Andreya, you are having a fast food meal for your wedding reception, yet expect your BMs to purchase cowboy boots? That's pretty unbelievable. Boots can be hundreds of dollars. And cheap boots are just that - cheap.

Why does it matter what people here have always done "in the past"? Just because other brides have made you purchase specific shoes does not make it right. Buying a dress that you only will wear once is bad enough. But to pass the cost of shoes onto your friends because of YOUR vision for red or purple or seafoam green shoes, that they won't wear again, is wrong.

Unless you says "any black or neutral shoe", you should pay for them.

For everyone who is saying "nobody is going to notice the bridesmaids shoes", this is kind of what I was envisioning for my wedding, except with all different black dresses. So I do think people will notice if everyone has red shoes.

How many times do you think you'll look at that one photo? I guarantee not as much as you think you will. If that one photo is super duper important, then you should buy the red shoes.

@Laura if that photo is why you want them to purchase red shoes, then I feel even more strongly that you should pay for them. That's as bad as telling bridesmaids they have to purchase a "bridesmaid" robe so the bride can get her getting-ready photo.

I'm not wanting red shoes for a picture, I just like the look of red shoes with black dresses. My colors are red, black, and ivory with hints of silver. I was just curious who pays for shoes because bridesmaids pay for their dress no matter if they like it or not, it just has to be in budget. But as I said previously, I will discuss it with my bridesmaids all at once and see how it goes!

So far I only have my sister as MOH. Since I still haven't made up my mind of adding a BM So my sister automactically told me she is looking for her own dress. Honestly that kinda bother me cause in my mind I had that the day I get married I want my BMs to match with hair and shoes and nails. If my DF and I agree to keep it as that then I would be OK my sister getting her dress but I would love to shop with her cause I want it a specific color and want her to have nice shoes. She cut her hair and I told her I would like her to not cut it cause I want her to have a certain hairstyle. She told me she isn't planning to cut more and not to worry that her hair grows fast. Which it does faster then mine yes.

If you want same shoes suggest it. I think they should know it's your wedding and you expected same shoes

"I was just curious who pays for shoes because bridesmaids pay for their dress no matter if they like it or not"

Only if they're a bridesmaid in the wedding of a Bridezilla. No bride should ever force her bridesmaids to buy a dress they don't like.