Bridesmaids do I pay or do they?

Having to spend $215 to get ready for someone else's wedding would have me annoyed I think. Could they do their own hair & makeup? Also where do you live that a mani/pedi is $100?! I live outside NYC & you can get both for like $40

I'm actually in Canada, they cost 45 ish if they want gel nails and pedis are usually 35 so around $80. I don't expect them to get their hair and make up done. I told them I am hiring for myself and they all said they wanted it so I figure I shouldn't have to pay. I'm paying for my mothers and my mils make up because they are spending alot on our wedding. Over 250 guests. Here everything is expensive

I would have established what I expected my maids to pay for when I asked them to be maids.

I do think you are expecting them to pay for quite a lot. Giving other gifts to them does not negate the maids having to spend so much money. Instead of giving them so many gifts, why don't you pay for the mani/pedis and hair/makeup? And just keep the gifts simple but meaningful, maybe just the bracelet?

Every bride if different and every bridesmaid is in a different financial situation. But I think the majority of bridesmaids are people in college or just starting out in their careers, and therefore do not have $400+ to be spending on someone Else's wedding.

I only asked my maids to pay for their dress, and for most of them it is a financial stretch at $155, plus any alterations they might need. They will be taking care of their own hair and makeup. I just asked them to approve shoes and accessories with me first, but I am not requiring them to buy anything in particular.

Is it necessary that they have their hair and make-up and mani/pedis professionally done? I made these optional for my girls so that they didn't have to pay for it if they'd rather do their own hair/makeup/nails. That way it's their choice if they want to spend the money or not.

Another thing that you could do is to limit your bmaid gifts a bit. IMO you don't need to get a Coach wristlet AND Victoria's Secret stuff AND a tennis bracelet AND bridesmaid tanks AND totes...I would just go with 1 or 2 items that you think they'd like most, plus their shoes, and I think it's enough.

Sorry, I see you answered the post about whether you're requiring it after i wrote above post. I definitely don't think you need to pay for their hair/makeup/nails if it's optional!

The only thing I told them they had to pay for was their dresses. I told them I'm getting my nails done the day before at a nail salon that my friend works at. And they all said they wanted them done. I told them I'm hiring my friend to do my hair and makeup, and they said they would like their hair and make up done too. I let them know I wasn't going to pay for those if they wanted the gifts because then I would just give small gifts eg. ( bridesmaids tote, shirt and picture frame for a pic of us). They all said they loved the idea of the tennis bracelets. But now I have them asking if I'm paying for these things. I don't expect them to look a certain way, just dresses and shoes which I am approving only, they will be will be picking, I'm paying for shoes as well. My bridesmaids are all well off, none have babies and none are in college. My MOH is my sister and she's the only one not asking about it and she is actually the worst off and I thought would have been the one to ask about the money. I just don't want to be a rude person. I could definitely cut out the wristlets just thought it would be a nice thing for the wedding as they won't want to carry around purses. And I was going to buy them there strapless bras for the dresses. Thanks everyone

That is very expensive

You don't need to buy them wristlets and totes and other little personalized things. Most of those things wont get used after the wedding. And are just a waste of money. And i especially think you shouldn't buy them bras. I'm sure they can handle that themselves. I would just do the bracelet. And then if you wanted to add in the manis and pedis and hair and makeup (because you feel the need to pay for something more) that would be better.

Hair and makeup they could do theirselves. The day of they could take turns doing each others. I would hand them a bottle of nail polish and say have fun. It could be a girls day before the wedding.

Personally, I'm buying the nail polish for them to paint their nails the day of because I would like a photo off our nails. Theirs will be the color of the wedding and mine will be french tips.

I'm asking mine to pay for dress materials (I'm having them made) and to procure some sort of coordinating shoes of their choice. I don't care if they buy them or pull them out of their closets. Other than that, I'm making their earrings and also buying a *small* gift. They're doing their own hair, nails, and makeup.

I think you're over-thinking it. Are all of the girls actually behaving this way, or is it just one or two? I do have one girl who said she may not be able to pay for dress materials, so I'm going to see what we can do for her, after we figure out how much that's going to cost.

I would LOVE the gift bag you're planning, if I were a bridesmaid, but honestly, if I were really in a pinch with money, and it were a choice between having that, or all the required stuff (dress, nails, and shoes) paid for, I'd want the stuff paid for, even without a gift. Like others have said, give a smaller gift. Tell them to do their hair, nails, and makeup.

It is their responsibility to pay for their attire in the wedding, however, I would be annoyed going much over $100. If I had to pay over that, I wouldn't be able to afford it. Maybe they could do their hair and makeup on their own and you could just buy a bottle of nail polish for the color you want them to paint their nails and let them do it on their own to save you and them both money.

The typical rule of thumb is the bridesmaid should pay for their own hair, makeup and nails. However, this doesn't necessarily mean they have to go with your chosen vendor. If it's up to them to take care of these expenses they should have the option to do their own hair and makeup if they see fit.

I think you are paying for alot, the bracelets would be nice plus the shirts and shimmer for a gift, but the shoes and all else would be up to them. Just wait until you are in the mix of planning and getting things together youwill be like wow.