Bridesmaid Proposals

I wrote them cards (they were like $1 each, but obviously it was the sentiment that mattered most), got them candles, a mini bottle of champagne and a framed picture. They were a little over $20 each. I think the card was everyones favorite, so i would highly encourage that because it's inexpensive and something thoughful

I am one who would like my St of all to be talked to, privately, in phone or in person, and asked. With time to talk details, and see if it will work out. No gifts, no cute things. Lots of pressure comes with being handed a gift when asked. I know of so many people who said yes. Only to change to NO, weeks or months later. But from the start they realized the could not afford it , or had conflicts, or some other thing. And it is embarrassing as heck to both of you for them to open even a small gift, and call you then to say, nice gift, can't do it.
Even if budget is not an issue, just ask. Be prepared with some details, talk it over, and find out if there are any issues. No gifts up front .

View Quoted Comment I agree that there is nothing wrong with simply just asking but I also feel that if someone asked to be a part of your wedding it's still awkward to say no regardless if it's just a simple question or a gift. It's hard to tell a bride no I cannot be a part of your wedding but also I feel that some people at the time that they say yes may not have factored in finances or distance or other matters. That's just my opinion.

Are you guys shipping yours? My boxes have a mini bottle of champagne, a small candle, and a couple of other little things and I'm wondering how much it will be to ship!

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I am not sure what I am going to do honestly. I live within close proximity of 2 of my bridesmaids and then the other 2...1 in my hometown and 1 in NYC

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And to Kristin also:
They technically already know as I feel like I have been planning this since we were dating at 2 years lol. So, I have kinda stuck close to the ones I have told "yeah you're gonna be in it duh" lol, but I want to do something special for them because they are special to me.

View Quoted Comment You know your situation best. And I have no problem with the idea of showing appreciation to your chosen ladies. But I have repeatedly been in the situation as a MOH or BM, and also 2x as a bride, where people the bride had asked repeatedly through the years, or when dating, when engaged at 2-3 years, and several times in between, some of whom answered of course! Every time. Some said, if I can, I would love to. But when the time came, the bride did not privately ask again, with date, time and plans. And did a surprise drinks and gifts, or dinner and gifts, or had gifts sent. To sit over a nice dinner and drinks , invited for dinner and a movie with another 4 people, big surprise champagne and gifts brought out on a platter. I assumed, bought on her recent trip to Europe, just friend things. Not. They set the date. We we're being asked. 5 of us. No one could do it any time that month, May. The first 2 I would love to but I can't, I know I promised see if I could I would, the bride was clearly upset. She asked the other three. Then had hysterics. Upset, angry, humiliated. All the little things friends listen to, but do not write down. She had forgotten 3 of us were ending grad schools, or had in January. And had 2-3 days of professional boards/ bar exam in May. And each a weekend graduation. Inc. me. I would have skipped 2 siblings graduation s from college for her wedding. But not my brother's graduation cross the couple try, or next day wedding. Not my sister's or cousins weddings, at our home/ property. I was cooking half the food. 120-150 guests. All weekends booked. At least 10 weekends free in April ,June July. None in May, or last week in April. Exams, pregnancy with twins due the day before the wedding, a hubby in the service who had finally gotten to move his family to Europe, 2 onths before the wedding, and every other person with these reasons also had one family wedding and one major graduation or parents' 30th anniversary. The previous August and September and October, when she finally set tentative dates, then booked a venue, money down, she never checked the dates with us. I have been in other similar situations, though that was the only time 5 said no. But even 1,2 or three is upsetting and even humiliating to some. People's parents get cancer, relatives schedule weddings that may take priority, people get pregnant, or get promoted and work weekends with no time off for a year. Ateast a hundred times I have read really upset bride stories here, about people who promised!!!!
Then said no. For excellent reasons, but it still hurts if everything is locked in. How about showing your appreciation after a private talk, when those who have checked their calendars and current finances, and said yes? Among my favorite gifts as a BM or MOH, is music. CDS or DVDS of music that was memories with that friend, made on home computers. I always hate little things, candles, anything scented, or anything personalized. Little stuff, because I have always had big dogs, and now little kids and big dogs. Other good memories inexpensive things: a six pack of really fine beer, from an old hiking partner, because every night I wanted one, but would never carry the weight. String hammocks from a camping store, because I live in a wooden area, have trees around work, and like to pick 2 trees, tie up and relax. A florescent style ( now would be LED lantern for power failures and no electricity, from someone I lived with through a 16 day power outage. In other words, small, inexpensive, with memories of that person. Or hopes, when given nice calligraphy pens, knowing I would help with addressing things for their wedding. You know your situation best.

You can do personalized note, with mini champagne glasses and ring pop candy in nice box.

Say something Like I found my mister and now I need my sisters to stand by me as he puts a ring on it!

I did these for my bridesmaids. The lable I found online for $5 each. The wine is barefoot and fairly cheap. I also typed up a personal letter to each one to make it special. It was about $12 per BM. They really liked them!