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Dedicated April 2019

Bridesmaid drama

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FutureMrs.N, on January 29, 2019 at 10:38 AM

Please help!!!

I’m 66 days away from my wedding and im having bridesmaid drama. One of my bridesmaids is giving me grief because of a plus one. We are not allowing children at the wedding except the ones that are in the wedding. And I allowed her to bring her son. She now wants to bring her boyfriend as well. I explained to her that our guest list is closed and she is still insisting that I let her bring him. She has not been helpful at all and she told me that she couldn’t make it for the makeup trial I paid for because it was not worth her time and she called me a B***h. Yes she has already bought her dress but at this point I’m feeling very disrespected and I don’t want her at my shower or at my wedding for that matter. What would you do?

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31 Comments

Beginner June 2019
Alissa · on February 5, 2019 at 2:59 PM
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COULD NOT AGREE MORE!!! Preach
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Master June 2019
Danielle · on February 5, 2019 at 3:06 PM
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If I was her, I wouldn't come to your wedding or be in it if I wasn't allowed to bring my spouse at least. However, her calling you a B and being disrespectful like that sounds like the end of that friendship. If it were me I'd cut my loss, and move on. She would no longer be in or invited to the wedding.
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Dedicated April 2019
Desiree · on February 5, 2019 at 3:08 PM
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Well I think you should sit down and address the disrespect. If she has been with this boyfriend for less than 6 months i say its not an automatic invite. (i don't do "flavors of the week") If after speaking with her, her attitude is still the same, then i say ask her if she even still wants to be apart of thw wedding party. If she's your real friend she'll correct and adjust.
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Expert April 2019
Elizabeth · on February 5, 2019 at 3:14 PM
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Ugh sorry you're going through this. I'd say she can bring one person with her, either her son or her boyfriend. Personally my venue is small so I know the struggle isnt always just with budget but also space! I say stand firm that if she brings both son and boyfriend, one of them isnt going to have a seat or a plate of food. Final choice and she can pout about it. Personally I'd let it ride until ultimately she pulled out. But if you feel like it's too much then that's understandable too. Also I wouldn't be paying for her stuff. Her behavior puts you in the position you're in.
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Dedicated May 2019
Rosa · on February 5, 2019 at 3:20 PM
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Sounds like a sad situation as the drama is not needed . She should be obviously aware her plus one is her son whom you already made an exception for considering your wedding is a no children wedding . If she has brought this up to you way in advance you could have addressed it but I find it odd she didn’t mention her boyfriend at that time . Bad mouthing you will not make you change your position on the wedding count but it sure will make you change your position on that kind of friendship .
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Dedicated May 2020
Anonnn · on February 5, 2019 at 3:27 PM
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I think that this is a good way to approach things if you want to keep her in your wedding party. However, if I was my bridesmaid acting this way.. I would probably lose my cool if she disrespected me that way. Anyone who is going to bring drama to the “happiest day of my life” is going to quickly be cut.
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Savvy January 2019
Sarah · on February 6, 2019 at 12:23 PM
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I would say kick her out now. It will only get worse closer to the wedding.
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Devoted October 2019
Lauren · on February 6, 2019 at 3:42 PM
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I would kick her out of my BP and my life.
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Devoted September 2019
Paige · on February 6, 2019 at 3:56 PM
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I would tell her that she can bring her boyfriend if she leaves the kid. You already accommodated her the first time.
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Master 0000
Judith · on February 6, 2019 at 5:51 PM
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You should invite her boyfriend, her SO is part of a social unit , they are both there, or neither. There was no need to say yes to her son, but you did, so live with it. But he is not instead of a SO. When she asked she likely assumed you had the good manners to follow etiquette and invite SO. For calling you a nasty name, I would say, drop her from your friendship, and the wedding party. You were wrong about SO, but friends do not resort to that nasty name calling because they see things differently. That is not a friend worth having.
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Dedicated February 2020
Leandra · on November 14, 2019 at 6:13 PM
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Stick to your guns. I am also experiencing bridesmaid drama and to of it off it's my FH sister. I'm at my wits end and am tired of the disrespect so I just told her she come as a guest. Don't let anyone steal your joy!
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