Bridesmaid dilemma

So, my bridesmaid said that she unusable to attend Bachelorette party. She is off that weekend but claims she doesn't know if she will have plans. My Bachelorette is in September.



Now I hear as of today that her boyfriend, who is in the bridal party and walking with her, may not be able to get off from work. The wedding is in October. She said he just started his job and will need tangible invitations and may not be able to get off for the wedding and rehearsal dinner. I had said she should come to rehearsal and then let him know what to do.
I was understanding. I told her to let me know by October 1st. That's the rsvp dates for rehearsal and wedding. I've been more than understanding. I elt bridesmaids pick own dresses and didn't give specifications for hair and makeup. I even said worst case they can't be I'm the wedding party, they can attend as guests and I'll remove then from bridal party and reimburse her for what she spent.
Am I being fair? I've been very understanding and accommodating. She's backed out in theory, of all events and is leaving me up in the air till a month before. Advice please? Am I wrong to reimburse her for her stuff in the event she drops out? Many friends and family have told me it's her responsibility to make sure they are at events and it's more than 2 months away and is ample time to ask off from work if there is a commitment.