Bride's Wedding Regrets!

Still in the planning stages but...

Some things I’m a little relieved of now that we can postpone things (mainly due to Covid), is that we are looking a different ceremony venue. We booked an Airbnb in haste because of $ and also because it looked good online. It was nice in person after we visited but it just wasn’t quite what we dreamed of and I feel like we settled on that. So now we have more time to save more $ and to get married at a location that is us.

Having more time now means I can save more and get the dress that actually speaks to me and the theme that we’re doing. I feel like I bought a dress previously because it was beautiful and the price was right. Of course you do have to have a budget but I like that we have more time to plan and save to have the wedding we truly want and envisioned.

Also having been married once before, I regret having a larger wedding at that time. It was more to please my family and my mom especially wanted to invite all of my relatives, which is great but with a larger wedding it’s difficult to spend much if any time with everyone you invite. We’re having a very intimate wedding for both of us (FH & Myself) with close friends and immediate family so we can truly enjoy quality time with those who matter most.

That’s as much advice as I can give I hope that helps!

I wish i spent more time cleaning up. i know that sounds weird but i was so tired i just grabbed some stuff but not others and left the rest to the venue to clean up which they didn't mind but for instance i must have left like nearly 15 lbs of candy from my candy bar left behind! i wish i took all the candy with me aha

I can honestly say that I don't have any regrets about our wedding festivities, but here's the biggest things I'm glad I did:

- I made myself available to see our friends and family that were traveling in outside the wedding day. It was great to spend time with them when we could just hang out and not focus on the wedding.

- It was important that I set time aside to be alone. I ran last minute errands with my mom the day before the wedding but then had a few hours alone before the rehearsal. I also spent the night before the wedding alone with my dog and it was really nice to wake up and have coffee with him.

- Hire vendors that you can trust to do their jobs. We only had one wedding vendor that needed babysitting and fortunately, our DOC was the bomb and did that for us.

We are pretty deep into the wedding planning since our original date was supposed to be 10.10.2020 but due to COVID-19 we postponed until October 2021. Now that we have another year and a few months to plan, I can go back and make some changes to things I could have regretted.

Luckily, most of these things I was originally stressing over were so minor, like chair sashes & chair covers or upgrade to Chiavari chairs, or LED or real candles. Not sure if any other these little things would have made me regret anything, but I'm glad we've chosen to do it the way we want to. Real candles and Chiavari chairs.

Two things that were weighing on me were welcome bags for out of town guests and the day after brunch for out of towners. I don't think the budget will allow for both but who knows. But I do think I would regret not spending just a little more time with family and friends who made the trip for our wedding. So I'm hoping we can add that in or move the budget around to make it work.

We are 'splurging' on the prime rib carving station and an open bar. Food and alcohol are important to us and our guests.

Make sure you are doing your wedding your way!

Also planning and here is what I do not regret:

Just marrying with my best friend and her husband. We told the closest people in our family and they support us and know I will give them tons of pics to view. Some will get framed. It has been less stress and I can splurge on some things that I could not with a larger wedding.

Not following certain etiquette rules to an extent. Not having a bridal shower but want to celebrate with my girls and in my circle they support my ceremony and wanna celebrate me. I am doing a brunch and not asking for gifts but blessed my MOH is hosting it and my friends I have told cannot wait to come.

Splurging on photography. My friend who got married last year learned about getting not too experienced photography for a good deal. She liked some of her pics but a lot she did not and she said that there was a lot they did not.

I only regret not eloping abroad lol.

Following!

We’re two months out, but lately I’ve been regretting that I bought my dress so fast. It was a great deal and I still love my dress, but I bought it a year ago and since it was only the second store I went to (and the first that had stuff in my ideal budget) I wish I would have taken my time. I had fun dress shopping, so I think that’s part of it.
Things I’m glad I did:
1. Splurge on a photographer- he has been a wealth of knowledge through this process and I trust him completely to provide incredible photos2. Focus on us rather than what is traditional/expected, we are having a sunrise ceremony because breakfast dates are far more common for us due to my FH working nights. Our first date was breakfast and it just fits us. (This should really be number one I guess.)3. Getting started on diys early and slowly collecting things over the last year rather than buying decor and stuff all at once4. Giving myself a break when I got too stressed, I did zero wedding planning for probably 5 months out of our 19 month engagement, not consecutive months, but a week or two at a time I just stepped away. Good luck!

Biggest regret from my first wedding was not having a photographer for better pics. Granted, I'm kinda glad I didn't have a bunch of professional photos to get rid of when that marriage went south almost immediately.


Just had a COVID elopement yesterday, and I must say our photographer's skills were worth EVERY PENNY! She worked absolutely magic capturing our personality and relationship on camera.

I'm grateful that I was able to find a good photographer for a very reasonable price. Maybe this sounds selfish but my little regret was not spending money on hair/nails. Unfortunately it wouldn't have worked in the end because our wedding (under 50 people, we refused to postpone) was just after the restrictions, so salons wouldn't have been open anyway. I just don't have confidence in my hair and nail skills.

Splurged on dress, venue, food/wine—all worth it! Photographer was reasonable and well worth every penny (definitely have a 2nd shooter). Venue & photographer both #1 in my eyes.


Saved money on non-floral centerpieces, no wedding party, no video (wanted it but way over-budget)—no regrets. DIY decor was cool but way too much work & is not low cost.
Wish I booked a massage the week of. So stressed.

My biggest regret from our wedding (almost two years ago) is some of the people we invited - especially the late additions to our list. Most of them aren't in our lives and we didn't need them at our wedding. Keep the guest list short.

My biggest regret so far is picking my bridal party to soon. I would wait and think about it more.

We did a tiny Covid elopement and rescheduled our larger ceremony and reception to next year.

I say don't overspend on items you will only use once, especially minor details. For example, some brides spend hundreds on a veil and shoes. I got my veil for $16 on Amazon and wore it for maybe an hour before taking it out (just today I gifted it to a co-worker to give to her little girl who LOVES playing princess). I also bought inexpensive (<$30) nude block heels I could wear again after the wedding. They were comfortable and look great in photos, and I don't for one second wish I had more expensive, ivory satin, lace, or jeweled shoes instead.

Definitely invest in a good photographer. We had a handful of guests (our parents and some close friends) at our elopement and their photos were garbage. Our professional photographer got some great shots and made the last minute thrown together event feel special.

In general, I think it makes sense to spend more on things that are normally more important to you (for us that was photography, food, and beer), and cut back on things you don't care as much about (I didn't want a super expensive dress, and having a bunch of personalized and wedding specific decor seemed superfluous to us). Your wedding should reflect you, so invest where it feels right and don't feel like you need to overspend on things that aren't important to you just because that's what society says you should do.

We are happily married and what we didn’t compromise on was our venue. We got married at a historic observatory that is very sentimental to us. They are not a wedding venue but we asked and got special permission so it worked out perfectly! If there is something personal to you, keep that in mind. I didn’t compromise on my dress. I was very set on my dress budget and even though my perfect dress exceeded it, the boutique brought their price down under my budget so with alteration and everything I still came out within that. DO NOT skimp on the photographer! Our photographer was AMAZING and our wedding pictures are throughout our house so I see them literally everyday. I LOVE THEM!!! That said, we didn’t spend money on a videographer and let one of our friends run the video camera and he did great. We have watched the video several times and I’m happy we have it but it wasn’t the most important.


Also, we really wanted a fun, romantic stress-free wedding and I went into it with the expectation that “something/s” wouldn’t go as planned. And everything was perfect, but only because I didn’t expect it to be. That’s the best advice I can give anyone getting married. Expect hiccups and laugh because today you are marrying your best friend and love of your life. Literally nothing else matters.

I don't for a second regret any of our decisions for our wedding day. I do however, wished I was a little bit more stern with my DOC as she skipped right over my dad saying a few words during the reception. My dad is a shy guy so he didn't push it with her; I didn't find out until about an hour later.