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Just Said Yes May 2020

Bridal Shower & Family Drama

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Carolyn, on December 23, 2019 at 9:34 AM

Please tell me if I’m crazy.

My grandmother decided she was going to throw me a bridal shower without asking me, but decided she will only invite the women on my side of the family. She already booked the place & said there was no way to add people because she couldn’t afford it and the room only holds 30 people.
I told her I didn’t want two parties, we could help with the cost of the party (my FMIL said she would pay for the overage), and I would prefer to have it be a joint party because:
A. that’s how it is done now (not sure if when she got married in 1964 it was different??) B. I would like both sides to get together before the weddingC. It’s our wedding/shower, and we’ve had to cave on so many other things that I needed to put my foot down and ask for what we want
I told her all of this, and she cancelled the party so now I have to find some way to plan it within the next 3 months. 🙃

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24 Comments

Super September 2026
Laura · on January 4, 2020 at 3:48 PM
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If G'ma wants to throw a party for her granddaughter - I'd graciously say that I'd be there. After all it's not you throwing the party. It's her party for you. Then I'd expect a groom's side shower too.

If you wanted both sides together before the wedding, you could still have that. Usually it's the rehearsal dinner. I feel bad for grandma. I wish this had gone differently for all of you.
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Savvy October 2020
Kelly · on January 6, 2020 at 12:54 PM
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It may be different in out cases but my BM/MOH are arranging the bridal shower and inviting people. It won't be many family members since we both have small families and more friends that we consider family. My sister is hosting a high tea since she puts on one in May and has a ton of stuff for it. Maybe the bridal party can help. They other 2 weddings I have been a part of that is what we have done.
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Expert October 2019
Tamika · on January 6, 2020 at 4:06 PM
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My girls threw me a "Surprise" Bridal shower 09/2019 and SURPRISE!!! No one showed up. I told that I did not want one because we did not need anything and plus we was having a Destination Wedding that October and they needed to save their money for when they went down there to Gatlinburg. I was livid and still upset about it.
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Expert October 2019
Tamika · on January 6, 2020 at 4:19 PM
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Please don't let this stress you out and enjoy your moment.
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