"Bridal Roast"

I don't think it's appropriate, and I dread to think of what FH best man has come up with

That seems rude to me. A couple of cute jokes/some poking fun at you- sure. A "roast" with "crude" jokes? I'd be pissed.

Also if you are concerned about the content, you may want to move her speech to the rehearsal dinner instead - at least limit the number of audience members she has if she is going to be an asshole lol.

Our best man said the following: "MAN I WISH I COULD TELL THAT STORY ABOUT YOU GETTING FUCKING DRUNK AND PUKING IN YOUR BACKSEAT!!"

So I feel your pain.

Ashley, my fh has been dreading my sisters speech since day 1 of planning! He has tons of relatives coming from out of town that I've never met and we'd hate for them to leave our wedding day with a negative impression of me. I fully plan on telling her this ASAP. @pej - we are having a rather small rehearsal dinner so I don't think that will work :/ would it be wrong to strip her of her speech rights and have my brother give the speech for me instead?!

@staceydeezy - wow! Haha! Classy bm! Lol sorry that was said! But I'd be alright with that if it came from my sister! She is about the meanest person possible to ask to write a speech! I'm going to have it proof read for sure and if she can't keep it some what sophisticated, I'm stripping her of her speech! lol

I don't think it's unreasonable to "strip her" of her speech. Especially since she's confirmed that she's going to be rude.

That kind of thing is more appropriate for the rehearsal dinner, not the wedding.

*smh*

I hate when people think they're being clever, and they're just NOT.

One MOH gave this speech about how the bride didn't like the groom at first, but didn't make it a "cute story." it was embarrassing.

Nope nope nope nope. If someone threatened to "roast" me at my wedding, I would agree upon a signal with the DJ; if the person started to make crude jokes/go to far, then I would give the signal to the DJ who would cut the mic and move on with the ceremony by saying something along the lines of "Let's give it up for bride and groom! Everybody drink to their health!"

It's not appropriate at all. It will be mortifying to you, to your parents and to your guests. She toes the line or she's gone.

Last year, FSIL got married. FH and FBIL gave a toast and I felt horrible for her... granted, FSIL is not the nicest person, generally is horrible and has a terrible attitude about everything, but they could not come up with one nice thing to say about her. Except for how much they love her husband. It was a total roast, but to her credit she did try and let it roll off her back...

Totally inappropriate.

Unfortunately even having someone read the speech to clear it won't completely stop her once she has the mic. Maybe ask for a compromise? Tell her she can roast you and the bachelorette party instead, but the wedding toast needs to be clean. And give your DJ the heads up and tell him to cut her off if she gets bad. My DJ told me he was prepared to tackle anyone who stepped out of line

I was my sister's MOH and she had a long list of things I couldn't mention in the toast. So at her bachelorette party I made a toast titled "Things I Wish I Could Say at the Wedding But I Can't." It was hysterical -- even she laughed. But there was no way I would even think about mentioning those things in my actual toast.

Whoa, if she is dead set on a speech like that, let your DJ or MC know not to give her the mic

My MOH told me she was going to rap her speech...i said, umm...how about not.

I have this fear about the best man... he's not always the most eloquent and loves to discuss things that shouldn't be discussed in public. So his speech will have to be approved by the MOH, since they want their speeches to be a surprise. I trust my MOH so I think it'll be ok.

Have a discussion with her that roasting you in front of your in-laws and their family members is really not the greatest way to start your life with your FH. If she doesn't back down... then make sure she doesn't get the mic.

Wrong.

If she feels this is the only toast she can do, then she doesn't do a toast. There is no reason to "Roast" you on one of the happiest days of your life. If my MOH did this, I would be pissed.

I already lectured my sister about this, but I'm still worried. I feel your pain.

Im also kind of worried about what my FH brother will say at our wedding. At his wedding, he got drunk and made fun of his father in law. Imitating his accent, calling him cheap, and making fun of his religion. I suppose his wife's family had a good laugh and no one was upset, but MY FAMILY WOULD BE MORTIFIED. If you and your family don't have that sort of sense of humor, let her know that it makes you uncomfortable, and absolutely have someone you trust read her speech first. If she still insists, just don't allow her to get the mic.

Id personally love a roast at the wedding, but we're the kind of group of people who find it amusing and dont mind crudeness. if you're worried either threaten to cut the speech if she insists on keeping her speech as is, or just have her give it at the rehearsal to get it out of her system

At FH's friend's wedding the MOH and BM did a speech together basically roasting the couple, and it was actually really funny and sweet. It worked for the kind of relationship they all have with one another, and they didn't take it too far. Your sister should absolutely take your preferences into consideration.

I do have friends that actually held a roast the night before their wedding. After the RD, their friends got together at a bar specifically to roast them. I took a red eye in that night, so I have no idea how well it went over. They did it partially because they knew the BM and bride weren't that fond of one another and were worried about his wedding speech.

I agree that a wedding is not the time and place for a roast. If it fits with your friends and family then by all means. I would rather not have grandparents hear about the time I got really drunk and peed on the street in front of a nightclub, or something else of equal or greater embarrassment. Some of our guests are quite religious as well so I would prefer to keep the wedding speeches PG-13 so no one is offended.