Bridal Party

View Quoted Comment You're right about this! It is the Maid of Honor's to help out and take the stress off of you. I think maybe you're giving them too much freedom when it comes to getting stuff together. It sucks but sometimes you do have to have a bridezilla moment to get people on track. And don't let your fiance off so easily, he needs to pitch in help. Good luck!

I have planned this entire wedding by myself. It's actually less stressful that way, IMO. Your girls know what dress to get, and they know their deadline for ordering provided by the store. Have faith that they will get them. None of my girls ordered their dresses till they went on sale about 2 months after we picked them out.

View Quoted Comment I completely get it I’ve tried giving my fiancé tasks but life gets the best of him and it falls back to me. I’m great at getting it all done but the excessive and extent of research that I do ugh. I’ll try setting a deadline maybe that will help. I basically have our entire wedding reseption packed into our house 🤣

They should definitely be helping. But, what I realized is if you don't ask- They won't know. So don't be afraid to ask for opinions or for favors. I have both of mine in a group text so If I have an idea I send it and get both feed backs. Yesterday, I finally asked my sister to help with ideas on centerpieces. She said "sister all you have to do is ask" so definitely use your words and ask. The FH thing is sad to say a "man thing" don't take it too personal. I was so excited to start planning and my FH just went with whatever I said. When I mentioned that I would love for his help and his own opinions he said he would start... We are 4 months out and STILL hasn't started lol.

My girls didn't help me plan at all. I didn't expect them to though because it's not their wedding. They bought their dresses about 3-4 months before the wedding. All took about 2-4 weeks to come in. It's not worth stressing over them not paying attention to you. Maybe a "please have your dress ordered by this date to ensure it's here on time and have time for alterations if need be". That's about all you can do if they aren't close. According to most, the bridesmaids responsibility is to get the dress and show up the day of. It's optional for them to throw a bridal shower and a bachelorette party. It's nice to have someone to lean on if nothing more than moral support or someone just to talk to..but if they aren't excited about ordering dresses.. they probably don't want to help you plan either.

I've pretty much taken it one task a week and gotten things done so I wasn't trying to do 10 things at once. I had to give deadlines to my FH about things (like ordering shirts, telling his guys this or that, etc). My wedding is this weekend and as of now, everything is done but me getting a spray tan (today). Deep breaths.

I feel you - I've been pretty lucky so far, most of my girls have been super helpful - especially my MOH. However, she is dealing with a lot of things that are really stressful, so I am being respective and giving her some space... however, it is so hard on me, as she is literally the best.

I asked my one bridesmaid to help me chose between a sand ceremony or a wine ceremony - she didn't know what either were, so I explained them to her... then she goes, I'm the wrong person to ask, they both sound corny (not the response that I was looking for lol).

I have had the same problem. I feel like I'm by myself in everything, they are my best friends but they all live far away and have lives. Though it would be nice for a little help!

View Quoted Comment I agree. The bridesmaids are totally supposed to help. The whole origination of bridesmaids was to 'distract evil spirits away' so they couldn't figure out which one was the bride and make infertile lol ... totally not what we have them for these days but yes I feel they should be helping.


I have a group text with my maid and matron of honor and as I do something or buy something i send them a pic or ask their Opinions etc. My maid lives out of state and my matron works full time and has 2 toddlers so neither has had much time to help me but they have been great communicating and giving me their opinions.

Sometimes I do feel like I'm overwhelming them with wedding stuff though, so I'll call or individually text one of them about things going on in their lives. Not sure if you tried that or not yet. I would definitely try talking and telling them how you feel via phone or text though. Alot of times ppl dont realize how their 'not responding 'can be hurtful. I'm super guilty of this myself and had to have my friends being it to my attention and though I'm not perfect now I do respond but it may be a day later.

As for their dresses. Did you give them a specific color? I was able to go with both of my girls to the store for them to try on and also while I looked for my wedding dress.

One of them didn't find a dress they liked during our visit so I went online and ordered swatches from JJs House to compare colors and found an exact match and so my other girl found her dress from that site.

Something else you could consider doing is picking a specific dress, find out how long it will take for it to come in from the store and then tell your girls you've had a change of heart and they need to order this dress by XX date.

If it helps any my FH doesn't help plan either. I make decisions, diys, etc on my own. When I have a big decision I go to him and tell him the options then let him decide. That's the most I get out of him, but he just says 'Babe its whatever you want, I'll be happy regardless' so that's kinda how we do it.

I only have 1 aunt and uncle (hes walking me down the aisle) aand 2 cousins so I dont have any help from family either and sometimes feel like I'm doing it alone, but then I just msg one of my girls.

My FMIL has also been a huge help. We msg on FB messenger daily ab the wedding and she is doing odds and ends for me to help with making decorations. Not sure of your relationship with FMIL but this is someone you could possibly ask to help you and do things with. I know not everyone has a great relationship with in laws, but if you can make the relationship better during this time I totally would. I made it a point to take my dress to FMILs the day it came in so i could try it on for her and i could tell she loved that i did that for her and included her. I have lucked out and have amazing future in laws.

Hope something on here helps!

I completely understand how you are feeling; it hurts to feel like no one cares or wants to help! I agree with what some of the others are saying, though, and it might be worth talking to your maids -- about what's going on in their lives and also about how you are feeling. They may not realize. For some perspective, I was in a friend's wedding who gave similar requirements for dresses as you. I love her and was happy to help and give opinions, BUT I didn't start seriously shopping for a dress until maaaaaaaybe two months before the wedding. Most of the other bridesmaids followed a similar timeline (we all bought off the rack at department stores). She didn't give a deadline so if I/we made her feel the way you are feeling now about the dresses, I truly had no idea. So try talking to them -- it might just be a lack of communication. In the meantime, you have the rest of us to give opinions!

So I have bridesmaids all over and I had them order their dresses on azazie and it was seriously sooo easy. I just told them what color and length to wear and they picked whatever one they wanted. I agree with others that maybe your being too nonchalant about the dress for them to really understand. I would try giving them a deadline and some guidance!

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I'd definitely recommend an online vendor like Azazie for bridesmaids dresses, it made it SUPER EASY, that's what we did because all my bridesmaids live far away from each other.