Breaking with traditions?

View Quoted Comment This picture is stunning! Your dress, the sunset, your flowers- gorgeous!

I did a dress with colors on it. I feel like some people think this is a bad choice. But I think it is different and unique to the story I am trying to tell.

We are doing a first look to calm nerves and get some photos done, will likely switch up “bride and groom side” since he is a lefty and I am a righty, we aren’t doing bouquet or garter toss, we will not be called “mr. and Mrs. Husbandsname” since I am keeping my maiden name.

View Quoted Comment We are switching up sides too! I’ve never seen a single wedding where the couple has switched sides. I didn’t even realize there were “sides” until my FH pointed out that the side I want to stand on is the “groom’s side” LOL I had never noticed before then. I wonder how that tradition started 🤔

View Quoted Comment It comes from marriage by capture!!! Most men are right handed and carry their swords in their right hand, so they would use their left to “grab” the bride! Erego, left side was bride’s side.

View Quoted Comment That’s so crazy!!! Wow. I am definitely standing on the other side now! Thanks for sharing this!

View Quoted Comment Dead serious! Look it up 🤣

View Quoted Comment I would be absolutely ecstatic if I went to a wedding that served tiramisu instead of cake! We are planning to serve a dessert in addition to our wedding cakes (just to give guests a variety to choose from)... I don’t know why tiramisu never crossed my mind since it is one of my favorite desserts! 🤦🏼‍♀️

View Quoted Comment It sounds like we have very similar visions for our weddings! I love the way you described the vibe you want for your reception- that is exactly what we are going for also! All the wedding receptions i’ve been to recently have felt very rigid and overly planned out; like the majority of the evening is just moving through all the “required” wedding traditions (bridal party announcements, spotlight dances, cake cutting, garter and bouquet tosses, speeches, etc) in order to get all the instagram photos of them. We definitely want our reception to be the opposite of that- we just want it to be laid-back, fun and organic, so we won’t be doing any of the things listed above (except maybe cutting the cake?). We want our photographers to capture genuine experiences rather than a planned out/posed list of items we have to do. Not only does it feel more authentic, but it also releases us from the pressure of having to move from one activity to another in a certain amount of time. And I feel the exact same way as you do about first looks. Nearly all the first looks I’ve seen have come across awkward and inauthentic (which, what do you expect when you are standing there awkwardly with a camera pointed at you and being expected to have the perfect reaction when you see eachother?). From a logistical standpoint, it makes sense to do a first look; and I would absolutely love to get a lot of pictures and video out of the way before the ceremony, but FH and I both agreed there was no way we would be able to have a natural reaction seeing each other during the first. So that will be one of the only traditional things we keep at our wedding. We will be having a very small bridal party, and I will also be having a bridesman! Actually, I will be having a man of honor (and even more untraditional.. my man of honor is actually my ex boyfriend of 5 years, turned best friend for over 15 years!).

View Quoted Comment I didn’t realize that was a touchy subject either! I’ve never considered doing it, but now that you mention it, it totally makes sense! I know a lot of people have said they didn’t even get to eat at their reception because people were coming up to them nonstop!

View Quoted Comment Completely agree with the garter & bouquet toss becoming a thing of the past- I don’t even remember the last wedding I was at that had either one of them. Plus, the garter toss is just pretty cringe worthy 😖
I love the idea of speeches being done at the rehearsal dinner! I had never considered that, but I may be stealing that idea! LOL We are planning to have no speeches at our reception, and it’s always been a worry in the back of my mind that people will stand up and want to do one impromptu. Maybe allowing it at the rehearsal dinner would prevent that.

View Quoted Comment Totally agree!

View Quoted Comment I love that you chose a unique dress that suits you! Do you have a photo of it?!

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Girl there's a forum on here that got kinda mean when certain people thought it was okay lol.

That's exactly why we're wanting to do it!! If we're paying all this money for food, I better be able to eat some lol. I just never thought that the bride and groom being alone for 20min was such a big deal, especially when your guests are more focused on getting their food and eating as well during that same time span. I mean, almost everyone we know has done this so we thought it was common practice!

View Quoted Comment That’s so weird. I swear, people get really serious about their self appointed “manners police” badges sometimes 😂
Couples are off taking pictures by themselves while guests are at cocktail hour anyway, so I guess I don’t see what difference it makes if they use 20 minutes of that time to make sure they eat 🤷🏼‍♀️ And if they are in a completely different room, guests won’t even know they are eating anyway- they will just assume they are still taking pictures. I don’t see how this is any worse than having a sweetheart table during dinner, which people seem to feel as acceptable. If anything, the sweetheart table would seem more rude since you are sitting in the same room as your guests but separating yourselves from them and ignoring them. It’s weird what people deem acceptable and rude.

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Took the words right out of my mouth! We're doing it regardless, so if someone gets offended when I post our BAM, ooooh well! 😂😂

View Quoted Comment A girl’s gotta eat! 😂

We are doing family vows with my bonus daughter instead of a unity ceremony.

We also ditched the garter and bouq toss. Most of our friends and fam are married already, seemed like a waste.