Breaking the Norm

Gonna be a strange one here and answer: yes and no.

Thought all my life that if I got married I would 100% keep my last name. Or, if it came down to it, both of us could change our names to something new. (Actually, that's such a cute idea, I love that when it happens).
However, I've chosen to take his last name for my personal life (and legally for my personhood) BUT I'm turning my first+maiden name into my business name (loan out/llc) so that work and public wise, people see that name, not my personal. His last name is too cute not to pass up and I ended up loving the sound of it too.

I kept mine. Always wanted to, I didn't feel it was right I was expected to go through so much expense and headache when the groom isn't. Even a blended name felt wrong to me, I like my name, I want to keep it! A few of my family and friends think me wrong for this but it's my money and name, not theirs

I'm keeping my last name. This is my second marriage, and my daughter is not yet ready to be adopted by my new husband. Consequently I'm keeping my name so we have the same last name for travel and documentation purposes.

View Quoted Comment Very practical reasons! Thanks for sharing.

This isn't me, but a couple I know is doing an out-of-the-norm thing where the groom is taking the bride's last name. The reason is that his last name is Dyck, and he had really brutal experiences with bullying growing up. He doesn't want his children to have this last name, and he wants the whole family to have the same last name, so he is taking the bride's!

I'm keeping mine! My mom kept her maiden name while I got my dad's name and it seldom caused any confusion. FH is really proud of his name, so our kids will get his name while I keep mine.

View Quoted Comment Same!!!!!!!

View Quoted Comment Intetesting.... Thank you for sharing

I’m keeping mine! Was never a debate for me, although my partner assumed the opposite & so we had to have a conversation about it. I was willing to have him take my name or come up with a new name, but he didn’t want to do either so we’re both keeping our names.


My parents each kept their names, & many of my good friends’ parents kept their names, so the concept is not new to me. But my partner had never met anyone who didn’t change their name before he met my mother. I am steeling myself for the annoyance of being addressed incorrectly. I know my mom has struggled with this, even with my extended family where they KNOW she kept her name. I’ve had to correct people already when they’re like “soon you’ll have a new name!”

View Quoted Comment Yeah, most people I know don’t change it.
I’m not changing mine because I’m in my 50s and took my maiden name back after my divorce and don’t want to get used to a new one.
But I’m not going to go around correcting people who call me Mrs. G or anything like that.

View Quoted Comment Oh yes, that annoys me how ppl assume that women will have a new name after marriage. Thanks for sharing

View Quoted Comment May I ask which region of the States (I'm assuming you're American) do you live in?

View Quoted Comment Currently, east coast, near DC. A good portion of people I know are academics, govt or military that may skew it - women tend to be established in their careers, have publications or certifications.