Bitter non-bridesmaids?

I had a friend that made some comments about not being in our bridal party. I have one MOH and 2 BM, the MOH and 1 BM are my sisters and the other BM is my BFF of like 20 years so since we don't have a huge wedding party I think she realized that we wanted a small wedding party.

I have too many close friends to choose just a few BMs, so I decided to do just family as my BMs. That way none of my friends feel hurt or left out.

Disappointed yes, bitter no. If she doesn't want to be there and you're not all that close--just let it go. She probably wouldn't add to the atmosphere, anyway.

I haven't (yet) but I did have someone be all bitter about not being invited. She ASKED for an invite from the beginning. I informed her very politely that we hadn't seen or talked to each other beyond the occasional facebook comment in 4 years, and that unfortunately due to money I couldn't include everyone I have ever known on the guest list.

My cousin called me to apologized for not picking me as a bridesmaid (the thought had never even crossed my mind!)

Those are the closest things I've had to that so far, but I'm sure somewhere at one point someone is going to get their undies in a twist.

Yep - I also had the constant nagging of "So have you chosen your bridesmaids yet? What color are we wearing?".....uhhhh you're not one of them so it doesn't matter!

Girls will be girls...Through the whole wedding process, if there was anyone that was stirring drama or being ridiculous, I would just ignore it and keep about my merry little way! Just ignore her. The role of a BM is to stand by you and support you on an amazing day - sounds like she wouldn't be able to keep up with that.

My GMs all had significant others, and I didn't ask any of their ladies to be my BM. I didn't want the drama (and that would have been too many for me to handle LOL).

I have a very small circle of close friends anyway. The girls that would have possibly been that way were already in the wedding to begin with.

I think that is hard when people assume they will be in the wedding and then they are not. But ultimately you need to do what makes you happy and have who you want in your wedding!

Luckily I didn't, however I had a few girls I was friends with in high-school ( haven't talked to in years) get mad that they weren't invited to the wedding.

Yep! I was in my FH's uncle's wedding. My FH is very close with his uncle (he was more a father figure), so naturally, I became friendly with his now wife. Words can not describe this woman. She's manipulative, ugly (not looks, personality wise) and just downright a bitch. She has no friends, so she asked me to be in her wedding, fine. During everything, I was never asked to help with anything wedding related. I was simply a bridesmaid to help pay for her shower and bachelorette party. (Her 16 year old daughter, broke niece and a mutual friend were bridesmaids) After her wedding, I chose my BMs, obviously not including her. Welp, she went buck nutty. Constantly asking other people who was in my bridal party (which included our mutual friend that was in her wedding) and after that, she refused to speak to me. She ignored me everywhere we went- weddings, funerals, parties, family gatherings. We really don't even hang out with my FH's uncle anymore because of her. It's terrible, because we're technically family and it makes for awkward gatherings.

I have several friends that I'm close to that I would have loved to use, but honestly...how many of us have a million friends we love and would love to include? I stuck with my sisters, FSIL, and one friend. And I still feel like I have a lot in my BP.

Not so far but its early. i have a few very close friends that live far away and i'd hate for them to feel thrown in last minute, plus FH only has 2 people.

I had someone (best man's wife), say "you'll have to let me know what color the bm's are wearing so I dont get mistaken as one!" I thought that was a weird thing to say.

ETA: I was sort of a bitter non-bridesmaid. Both my step sisters are married and for both weddings, I was the only one in the immediate family not in the wedding party. My brother was best man for both, one cousin was in both, my neices were in both...it was really obvious and awkward. So my first sister's wedding I was peeved about that and drank too much and puked in the bathroom (I was 17), and no one has let me live it down since, so it got brought up at my other sister's wedding 6 years later. Awesome. Also at my second sister's wedding she bought me a dress for my birthday and asked that I wear it to the wedding, but it was REALLY not my style (very formal, black with sparkly flowers, floor length with a slit and a collar). She got married outside in the middle of july and I nearly died. Then her MIL switched the escort cards and moved my real mom, FH and I to the back of the room. Given my family is very well-blended, I was extremely hurt until I found out it was the MIL that did it. Still was hurt over yet again being excluded, but now IDGAF, and hooray it means they don't have to be in my BP.

I had a friend try to replace a bridesmaid by buying the dress, planning my bachelor party and bridal shower behind my MOHʻs back.....

MOH put her in her place. Love her!

No, but I'm not having a bridal party- just my maid of honor and flower girls. I have SUCH a huge group of amazing women in my life- from cousins, to childhood friends, to my sorority sisters. I could have had a 20 person bridal party and I just didn't want that.

I will say, that I guess I was a bitter non bridesmaid in the past. One of my closest cousins got married and right after she got engaged she asked me to be a bridesmaid. I was SO excited and was the person primarily involved in helping her with her wedding plans- from wedding expos, to dress appointments, etc. A few months later, I found out that her sister was dating my ex boyfriend and was asked to step out of the bridal party. It was pretty hurtful, but in retrospect this crap happens.

My FH's BM has been dating the same girl for the past 5 years. My relationship with her has been...interesting. My FH and his BM were roommates, so the 4 of us practically lived together for a while, and with her and I being very different people, there was a lot of passive aggressive BS going on in that house. Ever since FH and I moved back to our hometown, though, we get along much better when we see each other. I had a mutual friend tell me that the BM's girlfriend is probably upset that she's not in the wedding, but IDGAF. She's not my friend by choice, only by proximity.

Wow I'm so sorry some of u have such bad expiriences w this. Makes mine seem minor. Hope it gets better lets all join the IDGAF club!!