Best Man insisting we pay for his tux

Che palle.

That was nice of your fi to offer to pay half.

"As you remember from your own wedding, this is not tradition. However we will stand by our promise to pay half of your tux rental."

Leave it at that and don't entertain the brother or his wife's blatherings.

Don't let their blorpiness steal any of the wonderfulness your wedding is going to be!

Nope. your FI is not responsible for the what the guys wear. That's the bridal party and groomsmen one duty is to pay for their attire unless you are willing and can afford to pay. IMHO they should know weddings can be $$$ so for them to ask your FI to pay for what they're wearing is kinda rude.

That's very rude for his brother to TELL him not ASK him. If my sister (my MOH) called and asked if I could help pay because times were tough, hell yea I would. If she called and said I had to pay because tradition (that I never heard of) states I need to... I'd have a few other words for her.

That was very sweet of your FI to offer half payment.

I agree with Nonna's advice. That's a perfect way to put it.

If that is the tradition it sound like the brother owes your FH some money. Tell them you are even, or that they owe your FH $1000.

Yeah. He needs to move on with this one. Brother or not, he can be a guest.

How the heck can he insist it's a tradition when he didn't do this for your FI? Holy double standards, Batman!

RUDE. Unfortunately, I wish your FI didn't agree to pay for half already. Why are men so stinking nice and non-confrontational.

I swear these last few weeks of planning have me completely over people and their entitled attitudes.

Also, I believe OP is stating her FH already has spent $1,000 on his own suit for their wedding. Maybe I misunderstood though. I just can't imagine expecting a groomsmen to pay $1000 for a tux! Insane.

It wouldn't have been wrong to tell them "Since this is tradition, let's just call it even then. As I paid for my own attire in your wedding."

I see how you are FutureMrs.

Sorry, couldn't resist

Why would your FBIL expect your FH to pay for his tux when FBIL did not pay for FH's tux?

I would do what @FutureMrs said -- well if its tradition, but I paid for my own suit at your wedding, lets just call it even.

Thanks everyone for letting me get my feelings out so I can now move on and put this out of my mind. It got me to 5 stars, so yay!

The suit was for his brother's wedding as best man. I think they feel like they did him a favor because they said to wear any nice black suit he owned. FI was in school and did not own one yet. Their family has high expectations, so it was unquestioned that he and the other gm would be wearing a custom fitted suit that they obviously all had in their closets. He would have needed one eventually and has used it a lot since, so it was not outlandish for him to spend the money. But he did buy that himself and they did not bring up the tradition that the best man is treated to a suit/tux at the time. It must be a new tradition.

Ok, so they didn't exactly require him to buy a new suit for their wedding.

That doesn't change this situation though. This isn't tradition. I agree with Nonna T though. Your FH already agreed to pay half so you should stand by that. Tell him next time anything wedding related like this comes up, put you on the phone to say hell no :-)

Sounds like older brother bullied your FI and FI let him. He had the chance to say "No way" when he was on the phone, but he didn't.

Sheesh muriel, how did you make that leap?

Sounds more like the brother and his wife are kinda assaholas.

@Nonna

Haha yeah and really it's the SIL. She loves pushing buttons. She told FMIL that they weren't going to Mother's Day brunch with her because they, she spoke for my FBIL , were getting their hair cut. Did not even attempt to smooth feathers by showing regret.

My FBIL is great on his own though and the brothers have a wonderful relationship.

Ok, so they did not require him to buy a $1000 suit. They said GM could wear any black suit and he selected a $1000 suit. That is not the same thing.

Anyway, I think he is being rude for asking as he and his wife likely know darn well that GM pay for their own attire, but if your FH is willing to pay half, that would be very generous and will help avoid any drama.

I've never ever heard of that tradition. Sounds like she's trying to pull a fast one on you guys and that's pretty shitty and shady. Your FH is sweet for offering to cover half but that sounds rather out of bounds for them to even bring that up. Sorry you gotta deal with that OP, she sounds like a real gem.

He should have said no, but it's too late now that he has agreed to pay half.

And for the record, I don't think it's right of you to complain about a thousand dollar suit for his wedding. If it just had to be any black suit, there was absolutely no reason for a college student without a ton of money to go drop a grand on a fancy suit. He could have gone to Kohls or Macy's or JC Penny or anywhere else and spent $150, then spent another $50-ish at a tailor, and been good to go. It was his decision to overspend.

Very sorry, what is done is done. You need to talk to FH about money, and both of you have to agree not to make money commitments without discussing with the other. Just say, I have to think about it, hang up or walk away. These people will never stop mooching off you if he doesn't learn.

That's not how it works. He could have rented a suit.