Belly-dancing at Reception *vent*

"Ew, no, absolutely not, this is just wrong," sounds good to me.

Is your mother helping pay for the wedding (i.e. does she have a say in the planning?). But I agree, if there is any way to avoid it, I would skip the belly dancing this time around...Lol.

^^ yup. (ETA: that was to PurpleKitten's post) I find adult belly dancers at weddings wildly inappropriate, but a ten year old?! No. Just no. Sorry I have no better words!

Lol seriously? Your mom thinks this is appropriate and would be well received? Your response seems like it would effectively get the point across. Stick with it.

No.......just no. Is your mom on crack?!? Very inappropriate, I would be very uncomfortable!

...what.

I'm assuming whatever theme of your wedding isn't going to fit belly dancing. I'd use that as an excuse besides the fact that a ten year old child belly dancing in front of 100+ people while they're trying to eat dinner seems not cool at all.

That's a big fat no. "Sorry mom. I want Cousin It involved in the wedding day, but I don't feel that is the appropriate thing for her to do." If it was my family I would literally tell them they have lost their fucking minds.

Haha, this is awesome, I'm glad I'm not the only one to feel this way. To be fair, my mother is Lebanese and sometimes doesn't understand American norms (ie why this would be wildly inappropriate).

@Valarie, your response seems like it will be the best received...thanks!

OP - Just show her the responses to your thread and maybe she'll get the hint.

Yeah....no. That would be my response. Belly dancing at a reception is one thing, as long as it fits with the theme or the couple. But a 10 year old doing it would make me feel really uncomfortable as a guest. Just tell her that it doesn't fit your theme but you are willing to take other suggestions.

What purplekitten said

I'm a belly dancer and it's actually traditional in some cultures to have belly dancing at weddings. It's not wildly inappropriate but it might not be appropriate for your wedding, and that's totally ok. And no offense to your cousin, but at that age I wouldn't expect her to be at a professional level that you would expect for a wedding performance. Just tell your mom that the cousin's performance should be saved for another time, but you would love for her to help out with some of the other roles that you've spoken to your mom about previously.

"Thanks, but no."

Your 10 year cousin can be the center of attention when it's her wedding day. She can go a day just being a guest!

I hope that none of you think that belly dancing is the same as burlesque, stripping or along that route. It's a cultural dance for women to be performed to other women and their families. It's not prostitution. The Salimpour Format is one of the "methods" that is taking belly dancing to a professional level, like ballet but in its own way. I thought I would just clarify...

"This is a wedding, not a luau."

Omg no. A 10 year old doing a belly dance by itself seems so add and inappropriate, let alone at a WEDDING.

Hell to the NO, MOM!!!

Edit: I'm not against belly dancing, but a 10 year old doing it seems odd.

Who is raising these children? My mom always said "its better to be seen then be heard" an analogy For sit down, be quiet and be a good little girl. When we helped (which we often did as children) there was no spot light, we set set up, we helped keep the younger kids occupied and out of the way, we went around our tabled and offered to refill glasses (hey, auntie can I get you some more to drink). Or we helped the elderly (walk grandma to her car, go make grandma’s plate so she doesn’t have to wait in a buffet line). Tell your mom to go old school, this 10 year old doesn’t need a special job.

LadyMonk, you are on point! It is absolutely the norm at some Lebanese weddings to have an adult, professional belly dancer. The main reason I think it's wildly inappropriate is her age. You also nailed the second reason I'm not into it, she's not at a professional level. Appreciate your input!

Ok, so what's wrong with a 10 year old doing belly dancing vs ballet? Nothing. They're just from different cultures. Sorry for hijacking, I'm just trying to educate And FYI luau is more up HIH's specialty. LOL.

But yeah, I don't think a wedding is a good place for another person to make a show out of something.