BAM! But felt kind of let down by the wedding

I'm sorry you feel let down - after all the planning and hard work that goes into planning weddings - I can understand the disappointment (I was totally disappointed after my wedding too - but for a few different reasons - it just really stunk to have put that much time and effort into making it a great time for people, and feeling like it didn't work out that way).

Honestly, no matter how much I love a friend or family - weddings on Fridays are tough for me. i work all work, and I'm exhausted. I start really early in the day, and usually use Friday as a sleep/catch up night. I wouldn't want to tell a bride "sorry, your wedding is too late on a work night for me, so I have to leave once I'm tired" but that's how I would feel - and if I started to get tired/cranky, DH would tell me we should go since he knows I don't do well with being tired in public.

Ceremony started at 5, cocktail hr at 5:30, and dinner at 6:45. First dance and cake cutting at 8, garter toss at 8:15. Half the guests were gone by 8:30. By 9:15, there was only a small handful of people. I had initially paid an extra hour to stretch the night out til 11, but we ended early because of how sparse the crowd was.

I thought ending the night so early was a let down, and I can't help but to feel hurt because I spent so much time and effort into this wedding. I am honestly more irked by those who left without saying goodbye.

How do you feel about guests leaving early? I'm not sure what I could have done to make the wedding more worthwhile for some people. Am I overthinking?

I'm sorry you felt let down! That is super disappointing.

I agree that Friday weddings are tough, and as you said with an older crowd that might have made it harder. My FH's grandfather, whom he's close with, isn't coming to our 5:30pm Saturday wedding at all because he says he fades around 9pm and would have to drive a bit. So it happens.

How many people did you invite all together? And did people have long drives after the wedding or were people mostly local?

Personally, I think you did everything you could; they were just rude. Who does that?

The only thing I might have done differently is to open the dance floor all along the way instead of only after dinner; that's usually what the dj's I know do... I do think that once people see the cake cut and a garter toss, they think it's over.

Try to think of the positives instead of the negatives. Do you have any pics yet to share with us?

@Erin, we had 76 guests at our wedding. The venue was pretty local, anywhere between a 15-45 minute drive for most people.

I'll post pics when I can! I don't really have any right now since they are all on other people's phones

Aww so sorry this happened.

I know it's a bummer but just remember how much fun you and now DH had. After all, it was YOUR day. Can't wait for pics

Why would they do that? It seems all elements were in place.

I usually leave after the cake is cut, but I'm not much for the dancing part. When I do leave, I at least make sure to touch base with the B&G and congratulate them.

They were rude but just shrug it off. Harping on it won't change it. It'll just drive you nuts. Of all the memories you store in your mind from yesterday, don't let this be one of them. Remember that they came. Remember that the rest of your day was what you wanted it to be. Congratulations and welcome to married life!

I'm so sorry. That's very rude of them, especially not to say thank you or goodbye. I'm so sorry, I hope you at least had an amazing time with the important people that stayed

Sadly, we live in a day and age where we can't even have dinner or pub time with friends without the phone being a huge distraction. Manners are in short supply.

I'm sorry but I would not expect every single guest to say goodbye and thank you. You could have been occupied at the time they wanted to leave - either with other guests or on the dance floor yourself. Are they supposed to wait around for 20 mins until you are available just to say goodbye? And I do not consider this "sneaking out" at all. They may have been trying to be respectful of your time and not wanting to interrupt what you were doing just to say goodbye. Presumably you had already touched base with every guest during the reception via table visits or a receiving line, and they had the chance to congratulate you then as well as you thanking them for attending. I don't see the big deal. If every guest came up to me to say goodbye, then that's all I would have been doing for the last hour of my wedding instead of having fun on the dance floor.

All that matters is that you are married to the person of your dreams and you both had a great time. I can see why you are let down. I would be quite irked if people left without saying atleast saying something to me. It is extremely rude. I am sorry!

Aww I'm so sorry. It sounds like you put a lot of work into hosting a beautiful day, and I'm sorry it didn't turn out quite how you wanted. It sounds like there were good things about your day though, since you had fun and now you're married to the love of your life! Congratulations on being married!

We'd love to see any pictures you may have from the day.

I'm so sorry you were let down but the good news is that you are now married! Congrats!

Sorry you feel disappointed. I had a Friday wedding. Mine was a later start and my cocktail was 1.5hrs long. So dinner wasn't served until close to 930 and the whole ting didn't end until 1230. I'd say most people stayed until at least 1130 when it started to clear out a bit. Good majority stayed until the end.

However I noticed most people didn't say goodbye to me nor H. I'm 50/50 if I do. Only because usually the bride and groom are having a great time dancing or what not and I don't want to bother them. Usually I send a text though thanking them. I didn't take it wrong with people not saying bye.

I am sorry you feel so let down. I would probably feel the same way. I am a little worried about it myself. My wedding is in 2 weeks and a decent amount of guests are older and it is an hour to hour and half drive for everyone. I'm really just hoping people stay and dance and have a great time for as long as possible. Congratulations of getting married.

In my opinion 5:30 is way too late to start. If your ceremony is at 530- I will be starving and hangry by dinner time. And then I'd probably get so tired eating that way and dancing at 9. This has nothing to do with a Friday wedding- kind of an every day thing. Especially if people have to drive back. So don't be disappointed- I hope your wedding was beautiful. Remember your wedding is not as important to anyone but you.

I felt the same way at our wedding. I totally get what your saying.

I'm sorry to hear that. I'm worried about that happening to me also. You spend so much time and money trying to keep your guests entertained and everyone disappears. That happened to my friend.