Bachelorette - how much is too much?

May - yikes! Your MOH is amazing for doing all that for people!

Lacie23 - that's the thing... I would so do this kind of thing for my girlfriends! The BM that is saying it costs too much (same one that we all spent about $120 for wine tasting and such on her bday) is discussing marriage with her bf and when we looked at BM dresses for her, we all told her that we were fine spending $100-$200 on just the dress! She could at least try to save up and come along for this, I haven't asked her to do anything else besides buy the BM dress.

Michelle - the only one planning and spending anything on my shower is MOH. These others aren't helping her (that I know of). They've also been asked to not worry about purchasing any gifts, and I've asked them to buy a dress. I'm not worried about hair/makeup, and they all had the same type of shoe to weara lready.

*sigh* And I was doing so well feeling excited and not concerned about anything :p

I don't think it's too much. When I was a Bridesmaid this summer I planned the brides bachelorette because the MOH is useless. I rented a hotel room, bought decorations, got a stripper, got a psychic, food, booze, games,etc...We were suppose to split it three way ( we're three bridesmaids) but the brides sister flat out said that was above her budget so the MOH and I decided to split the cost by two and just collect from the sister whatever she could contribute . The MOH couldn't repay me until the week after ( useless) and all in all it ended up costing about 800$ up front, I personally paid 350$ of that in the end. But my dress was 300$ and alterations another 250$ soooo yeah it adds up and just because someone had the funds doesn't mean they should spend their money that way. Some people love being a bridesmaid and love to lavish the Bride to be..,, others just think its just a wedding and would rather spent their money on something else. Nothing wrong with that either! I personally love being over the top and extravagant and spoil the shit out of my girlfriends. I know they will not do the same for me though

I could afford it, but I wouldn't want to. $99 just for the wine tasting is a lot, then you add in everything else. If we're talking about $200-$300...uhm, no. Remember, BMs already have so many things they are paying for, and also...no one is as excited about a wedding/shower/bachelorette party as brides are

Haha, thanks Amy. I'll just invite you and Lynzey and Felicia, you'll all drive over to Temecula and hang out with me right?!

Haha thanks Amy, I'll remember that Now where are Felicia and Lynzey?? Probably gearing up for Felicia's wedding!! Eek!

I know that my BM's couldnt afford it (because some of them are starving students) so I'm not planning anything too expensive. But I think that I wouldn't be too hurt if i was in your shoes. I would enjoy my time with the ones that could afford it and maybe do something small (like drinks or dinner) with the ones that can't afford it.

Hey Date Twin!

I don't think you're asking too much. If this is what you and MOH really want to do, then you guys go and those who want to come along will.

I would definitely be down for spending $200 on a bachelorotte party like this. Sounds like you're getting good value for the money and it's not your average get wasted at that bar thing.

That said, I have very few friends and am the first among the group to get married...so I have never had to shell out money being a bridesmaid. The only time I was a bridesmaid, I was 15, so I was not involved in the bachelorette activites and my mother paid for my dress.

If all your other maids bail on the wine tasting...I would so come with you!

I see you're a 5 star WW bride now! Congrats!!!!

I told all of my girls to set aside $300 if they can. Not because it will be that expensive but because I'd rather they each have a cushion. The hotel room is only $48 per person & comes with a full kitchen so the rest they can spend however they like.

Yikes! This sounds like fun, but it is two separate, elaborate, expensive events. Even if your friends have the $$, it's not up to anyone to tell them how to spend it. I am "fiscally responsible" with my money and I like to save and invest. Blowing $300 on a friend's bachelorette party like this would be out of the question for me. I rarely spend this kind of money on myself-- why would I spend it for someone else's party that I had no say in? If I weren't in the bridal party, I'd send my apologies and bow out. If I were in the bridal party, after spending so much on shoes, dress, flowers, gifts, shower, etc., it would not be in my budget and I'd tell you so. If you were an extremely close friend, then I would pay the $99 and go wine tasting with you, but I'd skip the partying/ hotel room part or vice-versa. Try not to take it personally and try not to hold a grudge. Go with your friends that can attend and have a blast!

I wanted to add, the most a bride/ MOH has ever asked me to spend on a bachelorette party is $50 to cover the limo and drinks. $200 is absurd in my circle.

I wouldn't be able to do it. Even before FH. I had a full time job but still had my own bills. Just last year I had to skip my best friend's bachelorette party except for supper because I couldn't afford it. If they can't afford it, they can't afford it...you have fun without them.