Awkward conversation with non-invited friends

Well, by saying "we're still mailing stuff out" you basically told her to keep the checking the mail because it's coming... The best way to handle it is to say "we are having a wedding with a limited guest list, we were not able to invite everyone we may have wanted to celebrate with" Or some other gentle let down that makes it not personal.

I'm not sure what you can do that makes it not hurtful now that you pawned her off by insinuating her STD is on the way...

WW has e-book on budget and guests not invited. WW states, to say "We wish we could invite you, but due to "budget" limits, we cannot invite....WW states to use "BUDGET" as the reason

I'm not sure how you handle it now because you said that some STD's were still on the way. That implies that hers is still coming. At this point, you're just going to have to hurt her feelings I think.

Or bite the budget bullet and invite her now. Especially since you did basically tell her she was invited and the STD was 'still being mailed out'.

If she's going to be very upset and is the only one left out of a specific friend group, at this point I'd do my best to just invite her, or risk ending the friendship.

You could just invite her and maybe create another friendship.

You'll need to tell her, I would just say that you were limited with your numbers, and unfortunately you had to cut people you would have loved to come

I wouldn't use budget because I keep reading posts where brides used that as an excuse and the response was, "I'll pay for my plate!" I plan to tell people that we kept it very small and our venue only allowed a very limited number of guests.

We've just told people that we're having a 'smaller' wedding.

I guess I'm more annoyed at the way she asked by doing it publicly than doing it privately. I'll reach out to her and just tell her it's due to the limit of how many we can have at the venue spot. And I agree I don't want to say budget is the reason because she WILL ask how much it is.

^^this^^

I agree with Christy. She knew what she was doing when she surprised you and confronted you in public.

No do not use budget. People will often say "oh I'll just pay then"

Use venue limitations. "Sorry, our venue/caterer can only accommodate so many people, so we we're restricted to family and close friends. I apologise for any confusion."

I had a girl at work do this to me. She said "I know we don't know each other that well but I was hoping to get a save the date." Wait, what? I was so caught off guard that she said that to me I just kind of stared at her and said we were having a small wedding but if she really wanted to come I would extend the invitation. She kept going on and on about us not being friends and upset she didn't get a STD. I don't understand people sometimes! Sorry, OP!

I just asked one of my married bridesmaids for her words and she said exactly what Christy said lol I don't know if she did it deliberately or not excuse she is awkward but I do plan on addressing how uncomfortable she made us with her actions. This isn't the first time she fished for verification she's coming or involved. She actually asked if she could be a bridesmaid when we got engaged. I just ignored her question that time and never revisited it, acted like I never heard her.

Christy nailed it.

What the heck. What's wrong with some people?

Christy got it right. That was very rude of her. I had something similar happen. FH and I were at an event for his job. We were talking to a friend of his, but he wasn't a very close friend. I'd never even met him before. FH's aunt was also there and mentioned that she couldn't wait for the wedding. This friend heard and started asking a bunch of questions about the wedding. Then he said he was looking forward to coming... I had to awkwardly tell him that we were keeping the guest list small... mostly family. Then he went to FH and said that he hopes to be invited. Ugh! He made it so uncomfortable, and no he is not invited.

It sounds like the asker and OP are part of the same social group, and most of the others were invited. Maybe the asker doesn't realize that OP considers them more of an acquaintance than a friend?

Christy I wish I could just DM you lol Yes and no. She's EXTREMELY socially awkward, never realizes what she says is inappropriate or makes others uncomfortable. She herself was engaged several years ago, but they ended things and she's been single since then. I guess she's afraid she's never going to have that ever after again, but she's never intentional. Someone thinks she has Aspergers but we don't know for sure. I like her enough, but we don't see her very often at all and it's not like we go out with her or have her over to the house either.

At this point, it sounds like you've implied her STD is pending delivery, so i would either move forward with the invite or accept that you're snubbing/ending whatever potential friendship would be there. if it were me, i'd probably just bite the bullet and invite her.