At Home Reception after Destination Wedding???

I think it's a little odd. You aren't a bride any longer. If you want people to see you in your dress I think it's ok to display a few wedding pictures at the reception.

I'd buy/ rent another fabulous dress to wear to an AHR.

It does seem gift grabby. I sat here and thought about how I would feel if I received an invite to a DW and could not attend. I would send the couple a gift and express my apologies.

But if I did that, and then got an invite to attend a reception a few weeks later, I would come but without a gift, and I would expect to see a replay of the ceremony on video! I had a friend of mine who invited everyone to the "wedding" but had the ceremony in private as a DW. I felt jipped. I really wanted to see that moment because I was truly happy for them. Instead, we came to a reception that was for "after the fact."

If I never got an invite to the DW but got an invite to a reception a few weeks later, I would feel some type of way, for not being considered good enough to be invited to the DW.

Definitely not gift grabby, just a way to celebrate with people that couldn't make it to the DW.

Can I ask why? If you know that 100 people of your nearest and dearest are unable to make it to your DW then why have one? Isn't it more important to have the family with you and witnessing the ceremony than it is to put on the dress again and have cake?

Sorry another question. If you are having a reception are you doing the full catered meal? Open bar? DJ?

We talked about having a DW and our VIPs wouldn't be able to make it so we felt it was more important that they be there with us. Why pay for a DW and then again for reception

Everyone keeps saying that this is gift grabby but I think it depends on the circumstances. My FH is from Europe and I'm from the US. One of us was going to have to have a DW regardless so we just decided to pick a 3rd location for our wedding so that one of us wouldn't have like 200 guests while the other only had a handful. Our VIPs are coming to our wedding but we still want to have receptions/parties in our respective countries for those close friends and family that simple couldn't make it to the wedding. Not for gifts, but so that they feel included and know what we love them.

FH and I are planning a DW in Italy with just out parents and siblings and then having a reception back here. Where we will do just the traditional first dances. I plan on wearing my dress to both occasions. We are doing both because I want a destination wedding and FH wants to be able to celebrate with his close friends and other family members.

I don't see anything wrong with having a reception when you get home. We had a backyard reception along with having an intimate destination wedding. None of our guests thought it was weird at all. Travel is a huge part of our lives and our guests knew that. In my opinion, having a reception has nothing to do with gifts, it's about bringing together the people you care about and celebrating your marriage.

At our reception, I did wear a wedding dress. We had it catered, but then bought an assortment popsicles for dessert. We didn't do a first dance, but we did have a couple toasts. It was super laid back and brief, but it was perfect!

@ Lisa thank you! I hate the idea the at home parties are gift grabby. If that's the case then people,you large weddings must only invite those people,for,the gift lol. Just kidding busy seriously. Just cuz someone wants to celebrate their marriage with people,doesn't mean they are expecting gift. I myself don't want gift or money. Only to have all my family together for the day. Same with showers and all other wedding related parties

You chose to have a DW. That will be your wedding. No second, no third no fourth. That was it.

I'm with Helena. You do your thing and that's it.

I look at at home party as just that a party. Not a wedding or a reception. If a couple wants to pay for food and drinks for more people wouldn't that fall under properly hosting? Its there money. If my VIPs weren't able to make it I wouldn't have had a destination wedding. And yes I did feel obligated to have an at home party but it will be more of an open house, come eat and drink on my dime and have a good time. There won't be first dances or toasts or anything wedding related. I don't think it's any more gift grabby than a large wedding. But that's my opinion. Now if I was self catering and not hosting it well and putting registry info and such on the invite yes that's wrong. As long as you do it the right way I think it's nice you want to include everyone. And tbh I'm still getting away cheaper than if I did the whole thing at home. $10,000 for both parties. With catered meal and open bar at each

Why is it that every time someone wants to throw a party it's considered "gift grabby"? Like I've never even considered that when I get an invitation somewhere that they are counting the potential gifts they will receive.

Op I recently attended one of these receptions and I had a blast with the newly weds. We all were just grateful they took the time to party with us here as well. They bride wore a beautiful lace fitted knee length dress. Wasn't her actual gown but seeing pictures it definitely reminded me of her wedding dress but it felt bridal and it fit the space and occasion.

They did also do a "1st dance" it was a choreographed number. We all knew they did it during their wedding but we were glad to see it.

I think your family will REALLY appreciate you throwing this party to celebrate with them. I was bummed I couldn't attend in San Fran. I felt included at the home reception.

@Pia, it's gift grabby to have two wedding receptions where you are wearing a wedding dress.

@Private User A lot of people choose DW for the destination it self! Who wouldn't want to get married in a beautiful place? Black sand beaches or pretty pink sand. Or heck back home?

@Gymrat so because Adults give gifts at weddings one is supposed to forget about their desire to host a party for their loved ones back home because someone will put themselves under undo pressure to buy them a gift.........?

This is starting to sound like.... "I don't want to buy you a gift" More than "gift grabby" The burden is not on the host it seems like it's on the guest.

My friend did this. Her DW was in Mexico with close immediate family and close friends, about 30 people. She had a reception two months later. It still had a timeline but was more laid back. She wore her dress. She and her husband waited in the lobby and greeted everyone as they came in. They had a cocktail hour, dinner at a set time, there was a slideshow of pictures in Mexico, they did a couple of dances, and then people danced, drank, and there was a Photo Booth. In Mexico, they did not have a cake to cut or dances, so this was important for them to have at the big reception. Try to remember that this is to celebrate your marriage with people, you love so you don't technically have to do all the traditional wedding stuff again if you do not want to. I think you'd be fine either way!

I didn't perceive it as odd that they had this reception. They wanted their wedding/honeymoon together at a location they love and have traveled to many times, while at the same time, they want people, especially other family and grandparents to be able to spend time with them celebrating their marriage. They both come from laid back families that knew that a DW was what they wanted.

I think saying nothing about gift at all on the invites is easy enough. If people ask, you can spread the word that their presence is all you two want. Not having a registry will also confirm that you two do not want gifts.

Thank you ! @pia. I hosted a Super Bowl party this year so I guess I was just looking for gifts LOL

I think it depends on how it's presented. If you have a casual party, no video, no dress, no nothing except the expectation that people will come to cheer you on, then fine. But once you get into play wedding territory, it's weird.

My cousin did this, they did an immediate family only ceremony on top of Vail mountain and then had a reception back home in Chicago a few weeks later. we thought it was fine, a bit non-traditional but it was well hosted and that's what their families wanted. His sister also eloped and did an open house party a few weeks later.

We kind of did this. Except, it was actually a casual party. It wasn't really a wedding reception, we just were married in a different state, so we visited where my family was at. I wore a dress that was to my knees and white. We had tons of desserts and had salads and soups and sandwiches catered (It wasn't anything too huge because it wasn't supposed to be wedding-y at all). It was really just a way for everyone to hang out. We didn't do any first dances. No DJs. It was a party. and I think this is totally fine.