Assigned tables and unexpected guests

I can't believe how calm and welcoming you're being about this. my mom has a cousin who's been known to crash weddings in Switzerland and Sweden in the past, she showed up out of nowhere to visit some family members nearby recently, and if she shows up at the wedding we're asking her to leave. I will be following up with phone calls after our RSVP date to make sure everyone we invited got the invitation and find out whether they are coming and what entree they want, but if someone just shows up with no warning and/or crashes our wedding, they may get a chair in the corner (if the caterer has extra).

I'm calm because there are bigger things really in life to worry about in all honesty. I mean we really want ALL our guests there. I know in life things happen. Sometimes you think you couldn't go and something happens and you can. Awesome, we still would love to see you. Obviously if a lot of people did it that would be a problem because there wouldn't be enough food... But I wouldn't expect such a thing in large numbers. I'm not really talking about "crashers" when I think of crashers I think of just random people I don't even know/guest doesn't know come to our wedding. I'm talking more so some one brought a plus one that we didn't know was coming (maybe they broke up, and the day before got together) what have you. It really doesn't bother me as long as everyone is feed and we have fun. I just simply am logical. I am the type I prepare for the worst so when if it does happen I don't get so upset because I already prepared myself for it.

I think I get more annoyed with NO shows than those who didn't RSVP... I did the babyshower for a friend we had five who said they would be there that didn't show up. It wasn't a big shower. It sucked because I had purchased things for each guest. So it was money down the tubes. I hate no shows URGH. I understand things happen but man it bites.

I'm not setting up extra seating for anyone who hasn't RSVPed or who has decided to tag along.

If their name is nowhere to be seen on the seating chart, it's for a reason.

Even though it is nice to have even #s so the seating chart makes every table full, mine didn't work out that way. I have 3 tables with 1 extra seat at each of them. If extras show, they will be separated from their "date" for the seated part at least. I worded my RSVPs in a way that made it very clear that there were only X number of seats available. I did have one person call and ask if she could bring a plus 1, but I would much prefer that than them randomly showing up.

My wedding is coming to be a buffet but we still have to know an exact amount of people. Did you make a wedding website maybe you can say it is important that you let us know asap if you are attending the weddding or bringing an extra guest.

Honestly?

We will be paying a large, buff man with a security uniform, and providing him with a list of names of invited guests who RSVPed. We also know of a few psychopaths who may be tempted to try to crash, just to try to ruin my life... so the security guard will also be receiving a list of THOSE names, WITH mug shots, and instructions to call the police if said individuals show up.

If you didn't RSVP properly, you do NOT get past my security troll.

Heh. I might even give him a club, and make the venue's door look like the Fat Lady's portrait from Harry Potter... I mean, if I'm using a security troll anyway. x-P

@Candida my point with buffet is the amounts they want an amount to get a general idea on how much to make but its not an exact like a plated dinner. Chances are you will have left overs possibly with the buffet the first go round unlike obviously a plated dinner.

It really isn't a huge deal for us like I said as long as it's not in huge numbers. People RSVPING yes ticks me off FAR more than someone who just didn't RSVP. While I would do everything in my power to make sure everyone knows the importance (as I have with like everything else in the past) there is always someone who doesn't. Being as I am someone who isn't a big RSVP'er (meaning I usually don't know if can come until the last minute and most know this) It really doesn't bother me in the slightest. We don't have anyone to "crash" our party so we are fine there too.

This post was really for those who DID or WILL accommodate those who came. Obviously those who are not it's not really a helpful post since we refuse to turn people away. I think the extra table on stand by is best solution for something like this and I am fine with that. I appreciate all the feed back.

Thanks Renee, Oh I find it rude and would LOVE a call if someone changes plans but totally not going to allow something like that to effect my night I figure roll with the punches....

Unfortunately for them they're going to the table designated for my photographers and videographers.

Erica I didn't think about a table for them Thanks for bring that up!