Asking for no photography from our guests?

I do think it is a bit extreme to ask them not to take photos of you during the reception, but I think its acceptable for the ceremony. I don't want people taking pictures during the ceremony mostly because I don't want phones or hands in my professional photos. If you're worried about being tagged in photos on like Facebook, there is a setting where you have to approve tagged photos so they may show up on your friend that added them's page, but they won't show up on yours at least.

View Quoted Comment To be completely honest I’m considering temporarily deleting my Facebook around the time of the wedding. Partially because I don’t want to be tagged in any photos and also because I have a very strong inkling that the negativity I’ve been receiving won’t stop by that time; and who wants to see negative things around the time of their wedding? I know it does sound a bit out there but I just feel extremely uncomfortable with that. I see it as a very private event. I genuinely don’t understand why people would want to take pictures of us.

No photos period does seem a bit extreme to me. Some of my favorite photos of my wedding were taken by friends and family and I'm grateful to have them. A photographer (or two if you have a second shooter) can't be everywhere at once to capture the great shots and he / she doesn't necessarily know who all the people are that you want included in photos. My photographer also didn't stay late at night so without friends/family I wouldn't have all that many from the dance floor. I guess I'm trying to say that I'm extremely grateful to those family and friends that took a lot of photos and shared them with me. I do however totally get your desire to not have pictures on social media like FB and think removing your profile is probably a good idea.

View Quoted Comment I honestly don’t know if I trust the people I’m inviting to be as good about taking those mémorable moment photos (at least from my relatives). Our photographer is with us until we leave the reception, luckily. But If they really feel the desperate to take pictures I thought about providing disposable cameras so they can take them home afterwards and have their own photos. I think I’ve let my family traumatize me way too much with camera and mean photography in the past that I don’t trust them to behave on my most special day.

Also if either of you two or anyone else has good alternatives or compromises to this I’d be more than happy to hear them.

I would say good luck with this, we had our officiant make an announcement no photography or video during the ceremony - I turned around and no one listened, my god father even Facebook lived the ceremony. My guests actually got a ton of really good photos during the reception and I loved it! I would say you can only control so much and you should no be worrying about that on your wedding day.

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You can set your FB so no one can tag you without your approval & nothing goes on your page without your consent. I did this for our wedding & it worked out fine!

View Quoted Comment So far this feels like the only thing I’m allowed to have some opinion on 🙁. I mean I’m hoping my family won’t turn this into a crap storm but they’ve never been able to behave at any family event and I have to invite them. I’m hoping I can enjoy some small aspects of the day itself without worrying who’s gonna act out or say something inappropriate.

This is your day, you and FH make the rules. You don’t want pictures, say no pictures. I Am still on the fence about pictures for the ceremony. They can take as many as they want at the reception but I just don’t want to get my professional pics back and just see a sea of phones as I’m walking down the aisle.

For the ceremony we asked for an unplugged ceremony and so far I have seen no pictures from there. For the reception people could absolutely take pictures, but everyone was talking to others, dancing, or eating and drinking. I haven’t received a lot of photos in general.

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You can definitely ask for an un-plugged wedding ceremony. As for the reception, Jennifer gives some great advice here! This is a good way to not get tagged in guest pictures prior to your seeing them!

Too many people end up with problems with their photographers after their weddings to risk not having anyone taking pictures. If the memory card in the camera corrupts, the photographer falls off the face of the planet, or straight up has a terrible day and the photos are just junk, I suspect you'd be glad to have pictures from your guests.

View Quoted Comment I do plan on making an unplugged wedding. And I also plan on temporarily deleting my facebook and privating any other social media I can think of. I don’t see a point in posting more than 2 or 3 photos, especially if I want to eliminate the chance for anyone to say anything negative. Plus I think wedding photos are something that don’t need to be shared with the general public. I mentioned the idea of an unplugged wedding to my partner and he thinks it’s rude and so do a few other guests but I really think it’s unfair to subject ourselves to tons and tons of pictures that aren’t being taken by the person we’re paying to take our pictures; especially when having my photo taken makes me extremely uncomfortable and people know that. I just hope people respect that wish for at least the ceremony.

View Quoted Comment Honestly, no not really. I don’t trust my relatives to take actual good photos of me. My friends, yeah probably because they actually like me haha. My relatives have a habit of of catching me at my worst angles and worst points in photos and then pointing it out, especially on social media. So I guess this is more: is it rude to ask my relatives to not take my picture haha. Because the friends I was able to invite would probably get some nice photos of me and I trust them to not purposely take bad photos of me (making me angry or upset and then taking a photo stuff like that). So I guess I really hope my friends are there to take 3 or 4 extra photos.

Ok so I think I’ve figured out the real reason and this topic has slightly shifted to: is it rude to ask my relatives to not take photos or videos of me during the ceremony and/or reception due to the fact that they have a history of not being nice to me when it comes to pictures. I trust my friends to not be rude with picture-taking and not purposely get bad photos of me; but not so much my relatives.

No at all rude. For the 100 plus years that cameras small enough to carry around have been owned by many many people, it has always been considered polite to ask permission to film anything, or take any pictures ( even just furniture of decorations, in any private home, or any private party where someone has paid for the use of the space. And for any solemn or religious ceremony. And extremely rude, cut this person out of your social circle forever rude, to take pictures without specific permission. Since the advent of small cameras on smartphones, lots of people act like paparazzi, who invade anyone and everyone's private spaces and moments, to put on social media or publish. Private parties, in rented spaces or homes, are private. What may be permitted is the sole decision of the hosts. If they want no pictures except by photographers they have hired, who know what they want on film, and what they don't, then no guest or person working the party should take amy pictures. Anyone who finds that an unreasonable restriction, should stay home. We have rights to enjoy our privacy in this country, under the constitution. No one has any right or entitlement to take pictures any where they want. Not even the press, in privately controlled spaces. Couples should feel fine about saying what can be filmed, and when, any what they do not want on film. Any person who says they want pics anyway, or who attempts to, should be disinvited or evicted. Treat them like someone who sneaked in your bedroom or bathroom when you are dressing ir having sex. If you are fine with pictures only outside after the ceremony, or after dinner at the reception, say so. Your party, your rules. Standard private party etiquette : Anyone who does not abide by the hosts rules, is summarily evicted and never invited again.to anything.

View Quoted Comment That is the hosts' decision to make, not every camera owners' decision separately. Some people would rather privacy over lots of pictures, others want lots of pictures. Neither is right or wrong. It is a matter of who gets to make the decision. At a wedding, it is the couple, the hosts. Not the guests. Guest who do what they want are like guests who invite a bunch of extra people to someone else's wedding: Awful rudeness by people with a huge sense of entitlement who always put what they want over what the host wants.

View Quoted Comment I hardly think that someone taking some pictures is even remotely comparable to someone inviting a bunch of other people. I also think that a host trying to control the behaviors of their guests is pretty ridiculous.

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I totally get what you mean! I hope they respect your wishes too. Wishing you the best

View Quoted Comment I am extremely uncomfortable with having my photo taken; to the point where having more than 3 people taking my photo (at the same time) gives me anxiety attacks. Having to spend an entire day with my photo being taken is already something I’m not too thrilled about but then adding on that there are going to be multiple people, the guests, taking my photo and asking me to pose and possibly encroaching on my personal space is not something I want to deal with on on my wedding day. Especially knowing that my relatives are going to push those limits just to get a photo purely for the purpose of posting it on social media. I like being a private person and I see my wedding day as a private event. If someone were to ask me if it’s ok if they take a photo, that’s ok. But I don’t want to be uncomfortable the whole day.