Asking a relative/friend to officiate?

My friend asked me. He's a Lutheran Pastor and offered to officiate my wedding. I was going to ask him to be a Bridesman, but I think he'd prefer to be the officiant.

That's really sweet. That's my concern - she hasn't offered, but she's very much a "anything you need, let me know" kind of person. I wouldn't want to put her on the spot.

Having someone offer is lovely! Unless it's someone you don't want to, haha.

My brother is marrying us. But he pretty much volunteered to do it. I thought about asking people but I did not want them to feel obligated.

That was my thinking too. I wouldn't really want to put her on the spot and make her feel like she has to, though I know she would probably be happy to do it.

FH's uncle is officiating our ceremony. We just called and asked him and he couldn't have been happier to do it. Officiating is a very special thing. No matter how you ask her I'm sure she would feel honored to officiate for you.

We are having a close friend officiate. He's never done it before and we asked him. He was very surprised and overwhelmed by the request at first and we made it clear that it was 100% ok for him to refuse if it made him too uncomfortable. But he said yes and we're so excited!

A friend of the family is marrying us. He's helped us out in so many ways so its really special to us that he is doing it. It gives it a really nice touch to have someone you know and love do it.

Thank you, Sassy Cincy Bride.

She's always been very nurturing and has always taken it upon herself to reach out to us as a couple; she has been looking very forward to our wedding, and I'm sure if it was too much, she would just decline. It's worth a try I guess. It would definitely make the ceremony incredibly special - she has an amazing way with words.

We asked my FH's brother to marry us. He's never officiated before, but I'm confident he'll do a great job. It's a small wedding and I put together a simple script for him.

We are also having FHs uncle officiate. We're not religious and it felt weird paying a random stranger to do it. We asked him and he was really excited to do it! And I don't think of it as putting him out, I mean once the ceremony is over, he still gets to enjoy the reception like any other guest.

FH's father is a minister, and when FH asked him plainly he laughed and said he would be honored. Since then, if there's ever a lull in the conversation he pipes up with "Dearly Beloved, we are gathered here today...." and then follows it with what ever FH and I are planning to do that day, it's pretty cute

I think it depends. Anyone in my family/friends that's ordained are people not close enough to come to the wedding so we'd feel weird coming out of the woods to ask a favor, and my FBIL is ordained through the church of the dude which I'm not even sure is legit and he's never officiated a wedding before, so we're not comfortable asking anymore.

One of my childhood friends is officiating, and it's extra special because she played a role in FH and I meeting each other. However, I only asked her because she had recently officiated another friend's wedding and expressed an interest in doing it again. Otherwise, to be honest, I'd be very nervous about asking a friend/relative and would probably have hired a professional. Maybe let your aunt know about your dream and how much you admire her successful marriage, but let her know she's under no obligation to say yes. (It's a huge responsibility!) If she declines, maybe she'd be open to doing a reading or having some other sort of special role in the wedding.

I agree with MzRosaLu. I'd be worried about having someone whose never done a wedding before perform mine. Perhaps a reading would be appropriate. But if you trust her ask! It never hurts.

Thank you for sharing, everyone! It really does depend I think and I guess only I can make the decision for myself. I think it's a really special idea but you're right, MzRosaLu, it is a huge responsibility and I of course would reassure her she's under no obligation to say yes. I wouldn't want to put that on her, since she is a busy woman. I'm a little nervous but not too much so.

If she declines, there's no worry, I have a professional in mind as a back-up.

I trust her completely. Like I said, I feel she has a way with words and she's a very sweet, emotional person, and very well-spoken, so I have no second thoughts about whether or not she would be great.

When I ask her, I may word it that I was wondering if she would maybe officiate our wedding OR like to give a reading of her choice during our ceremony.

My uncle is our officiant. I literally asked him over the phone if he would be interested. He's super excited!

My Uncle for us. I just simply asked..will you? and he said yes lol

Haha, seems to be that simple! I think I'm going to bite the bullet and ask. I think she would think it's very special; she's so sentimental. I will update with how it goes!

I also asked my uncle to do it. We wanted it to be someone who we both knew and loved and who loved us together. I adore my uncle and my dad and him are brothers and best friends and it just was the perfect person to ask. He's also our lawyer and came with us to our venue to make sure the contract was good before signing, then afterwards we went to coffee and asked him. He was so touched and speechless! Which is rare for him to be speechless! lol anyways, we're very excited and so is he.