As a MOH, how much am I expected to pay for with the Bachelorette party?

For the bachlorette parties I've attended (including my own), the bride didn't give such specific requests. She got to dictate the guest list and the general feel. This seems like a lot if you can't afford it, which sounds like you might not be able to.

I would research the costs and then tell everyone invited that it will cost X amount for the winery, X amount for tea and that you plan to take turns buying the bride her drinks. For the winery and tea, make the price you tell them include a portion to cover the brides cost as well. People may choose to just come for the winery or tea or drinks if they can't afford the whole weekend. You may end up having to pay a larger share if not everyone shows up.

Centerpiece, I agree with you to a certain extent. No one is entitled to all that and the fact that the bride dictated what she wants is a little much. However, my friends threw me a 3 day party locally with a girls' night in, a winery tour, clubbing, and a hotel downtown. I didn't ask for any of it, but they wanted to spend the weekend celebrating. In that situation, I think it's okay to graciously accept.

OP, I definitely don't think you are required to pay for everything. Talk to the other girls and see who is willing to chip in. If no one else wants to (which I can't imagine happening) and you are not willing to change the plan, then you can lower the cost by making a picnic of sandwiches for the winery and cooking dinner at home that evening. ETA: winery...not wedding

If you are footing the bill with others but using your card, have the cash upfront. Sadly I got burned last year by other members of the bridal party. We went for a fancy dinner and I had the brides meal and Jr bm dinner on my tab (Jr bm is her daughter and her bio dad gave me the cash when I picked her up). Then drinks and dancing. Night ended up costing me close to $500 and I was DD. We had planned it cost about $200 each. Sadly the other girls are I were never friends as we met through the bride and I never would think of unloading this on her

Every bachelorette party I've ever been to, every person pays for themselves plus splits the cost for the bride. So if you have 10 people at the bachelorette party, everyone pays their own way plus 1/10 of the bride's cost.

The shower is different, if you're throwing one, and only the hosts split the cost of that.

The person/people hosting/coordinating ever bachelorette party I've ever attended usually priced everything out and gave us all an estimate of things we could chip in for (i.e. I went to one last year and we took a limo to downtown Chicago and went out to dinner and an improve show and a comedy burlesque show. The MOH asked everyone for $20 to cover the limo rides to and from the city (including covering the costs for the bride's seat in the limo) and a portion of her dinner. We all really appreciated knowing the costs up front and it let all of us budget. Most of us ended up chipping in more because the MOH paid for like 10 bottles of champagne, decorations, favors, games, prizes, and spent a ton of time coordinating everything. Everyone was happy to chip in and no one expected her to pay for EVERYTHING. My MOH recently asked me if I thought it would be okay to ask the other girls to chip in (she's never been to a bachelorette party before (let alone hosted one) and she doesn't know any of the other girls and wanted my opinion as to how they would receive it if she asked). I told her that it should be fine because it seems like the general consensus that everyone chips in to help defray the cost.

I think it's awesome that you have planned a lovely getaway for the bride, with you also a

Bride!

My MOH didn't plan anything and I didn't have a bachelorette party. She's pretty lucky that you are trying to give her everything she wants.

I understand finances too. If ask the other members of the bridal party to split the cost or maybe consider cutting costs. She's going to love anything you do for her!

My MOH was looking at some pretty pricey options for mine, and I was uncomfortable with it because I didn't want all my girls to have to pay their share of what she was planning. We compromised on a much less expensive option than she was thinking, and I'm planning on everyone including me paying their share of lodging (around $60 a person) and finding their own way to get there (most are driving between 30 mins and 2 hours), and then the rest is up to my MOH to figure out and delegate.