Anyone ever "fire" a vendor?

You need to look at your contract and see what it says. If it's not something you can document (that she is negligent) and more like a personality conflict, most vendors have a non-refundable retainer clause in their contract - in which case you might be out the money.

I'm very sorry. It's always better if personality conflicts (if that's what it is) come out during the initial meeting and to follow your gut instinct. Believe me, it happens on the vendor side too, when we need to "fire" a client, as well. It's not fun for anybody, and I'd rather tell a potential client upfront that we are likely not a good fit, than to go forward with working with someone who doesn't understand me and whom I don't understand.

Try to state the facts and keep emotion out of it, and remain professional, and hopefully the photographer will, as well. Try not to make her feel personally attacked. I'm always much more inclined to have a better attitude with someone if they are nice than if they are creating a lot of drama at me.

Best wishes to you.

Thanks Monique! It's not a personality conflict-- she has a great personality conflict. She is very unresponsive, unreliable, and a little unprofessional. I would consider that negligence and it has caused my FH and I a lot of unnecessary stress thus far.

We had a unresponsive vendor that we had not put down a deposit on (because they don't do that they said) whom 2 weeks before the wedding wouldn't call me back/email anything. After calls/emails/texts etc and nothing...I send them another round saying if I didn't hear from them by x date I was going to have to book someone else. Then I texted the next day after that letting them know that I had not heard from them and was going with someone else. It felt bad but was so nice to have a reliable person the day of. I am so sorry your going through this.

Unfortunately, just because you and your FH see is as negligence does not mean a court will. Go over your contract.