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Anna
Super August 2020

Anyone else skip the bridesmaid proposal thing?

Anna, on June 27, 2019 at 2:17 PM Posted in Etiquette and Advice 0 39
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Did anyone else not do bridesmaid proposals? I knew who I wanted to be in our wedding party and we were so excited that we just asked our people in person or on the phone. No gift or anything.
I'm feeling a bit bad about this now that I see so many people doing gift boxes, etc.

Did anyone else forgo this?

39 Comments

  • Melle
    Legend June 2019
    Melle ·
    • Flag
    I did that. I feel kinda bad I didn't propose though just because it would have been cute aha
    • Reply
  • Furture Mrs. G
    Expert September 2019
    Furture Mrs. G ·
    • Flag

    I got a TINY gift for my girls. My FH didn't get his guys anything.

    It was nothing fancy or over the top.

    • Reply
  • Cristy
    Master May 2021
    Cristy ·
    • Flag

    I did. I never knew it was a thing until I started visiting these forums. I feel kinda bad that I didn't do anything for my girls, but none of them knew it was a thing either, so they didn't feel left out. I just talked to each one in person, or on the phone (my sister lives out of state), and asked them, and they were thrilled!! So, I guess no harm, no foul!

    • Reply
  • Kaitlyn
    Devoted May 2020
    Kaitlyn ·
    • Flag

    I literally asked all my bridesmaids over text.

    And my MOH I just told her that she was going to be that, but she's also my best friend since we were 16 and we've always talked about being each others MOH's.

    What I might do is just give them each something special to wear at the wedding that they can wear again after, like a piece of jewelry or a hair clip.

    • Reply
  • Nicole
    Devoted November 2019
    Nicole ·
    • Flag

    I sent them cards, no big proposal or gift.

    • Reply
  • 2d Bride
    Champion October 2009
    2d Bride ·
    • Flag

    We didn't do it. And I don't think they are a good idea. People who are approached to be bridesmaids with an elaborate "proposal" may find it hard to say no. And then you get lots of drama later on, as they really didn't want to be there (and in some cases, couldn't afford to be there) anyway.

    • Reply
  • Anna
    Super August 2020
    Anna ·
    • Flag

    Ok thanks guys! Feeling better now. I honestly was just SO excited to ask my crew (same with fiancée) that I didn't even think of taking the time to propose in any way. I'm definitely going to get them a gift at wedding time though. My maid of honour was hiding in the bushes taking photos when fiancée proposed... I asked her as soon as I saw her. haha

    • Reply
  • Heather
    Dedicated June 2021
    Heather ·
    • Flag
    I just asked i never did a birdesmaid proposal
    • Reply
  • MrsD
    Legend July 2019
    MrsD ·
    • Flag

    It's totally fine. I did formal proposal boxes AFTER I texted each girl individually, so they knew it was coming. I've been in two weddings, one just asked over the phone and one sent a card.

    • Reply
  • Brianna N
    Super October 2019
    Brianna N ·
    • Flag

    I just asked them in person/on the phone(those OOT), and it was perfectly fine!

    • Reply
  • Janiya
    Super June 2020
    Janiya ·
    • Flag

    Hi Anna! I didn't do the bridesmaid proposal. FH and I just asked everyone that we wanted to be apart of our special day. I will be providing my girls with makeup on the day of, getting ready outfits, and bridesmaid beach bags filled with gifts.

    • Reply
  • Wendy
    Super August 2020
    Wendy ·
    • Flag
    I originally went crazy and started getting the proposal boxes ready when I first got engaged, nothing too expensive, I think I spent about $10-$15 per box (5 boxes)... well first of all I’m glad I listened to the advice here and waited to asking my girls... my friendship with one of them is non existent at this point... and the other 4 I’m still very close with.. anyways I’m upset because we live in separate states so I’d have to mail them out... which now that I’m ready to do I realized how expensive is going to be.... so I’m canceling that and just sending them one of those proposal cards on the mail...
    • Reply
  • L
    Lady ·
    • Flag

    We didn't do it. I just asked on the phone or in person when I saw them. I personally think it's way over the top and a little silly. But everyone is different. Nothing wrong with not doing it!

    • Reply
  • Caytlyn
    Legend November 2019
    Caytlyn ·
    • Flag
    View Quoted Comment

    100% this.

    • Reply
  • Formerbride
    VIP June 2019
    Formerbride ·
    • Flag
    I did not do a proposal box or gift. I asked verbally and that is it.
    • Reply
  • October2019
    Dedicated October 2019
    October2019 ·
    • Flag
    I just asked those I could in person and the rest over the phone via text or phone call.
    • Reply
  • Meghan
    Super September 2019
    Meghan ·
    • Flag

    I didn't give a gift but I sent a scratch off card in the mail that revealed the "Will you be my bridesmaid?" question. My ladies are spread all over the world and in different time zones so trying to do it in person would have been way too difficult to plan.

    • Reply
  • Lauren
    VIP September 2019
    Lauren ·
    • Flag

    You could always do the boxes as a thank you gift. I would steer clear of items that say bridesmaid as I have found out they are a one time use only deal.

    • Reply
  • Kelly
    VIP October 2020
    Kelly ·
    • Flag
    I actually don't like the bridesmaid proposal things! I think they're weird!
    I honestly got over excited and just looked at my maid of honor and said "you know you're the maid of honor right?" She just laughed and said yes she knows. I wish I had a more polite conversation with her about it, but we've known each other for so long we had discussed it before I was engaged.
    • Reply
  • Alicia
    VIP August 2019
    Alicia ·
    • Flag

    Honestly, the whole "bridesmaid proposal" thing is a social media/pinterest fueled new(er) trend. I've been in 7 weddings, and never received a bridesmaid proposal for any of them. I made my girls a silly little card, but that was it. Not knocking the people who do it, no denying it's a cute idea, but I definitely didn't have room in my budget for proposals AND nice thank-you gifts.

    • Reply

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