Anyone else scale their wedding down?

I switched from plated meal to buffet and cut out the alcohol to save money, but that was it, and I certainly didn't regret either choice.

We actually scaled down a lot when we decided to have our wedding on an island in the Puget Sound. We both come from huge families (FH especially) and have a lot of supportive friends who want to be there with us. We decided to make it a DW to justify not inviting everyone. That being said we still invited 150 people, but our original guest list was getting close to 400. I told FH that I couldn't handle that many people staring at me all day, so the 150 is actually just bridal party, immediate family and first cousins with about maybe 10-15 extras we just couldn't cut out.

We started with wanting a small ceremony with no more than 25 guest, now we are at 42 guests. We said we would allow up to 45. I can honestly say we have invited everyone (family and friends) who is close to us. No regrets.

FH and I just made the decision to scale down today. We were going to a big wedding that would have put us in the hole but now have decided to do a DW with our 50 closest family & friend. A HUGE weight has been lifted off our shoulders.

ETA: spelling

Me and my FH gave talked about going to Vegas and get married cause it would be less stressful. Since everyone wants to act like it's their wedding and are driving us crazy.

we try not to pay so much attention to it because we have time.

@Celia - that's exactly what it was becoming and I definitely didn't want that.

@FutureMrsH - I hope you get exactly what you both want, you can always keep it small while going all out for the décor and dress and cake, etc. Compromise is definitely becoming a big thing with FW and I.

@Maggie - You are definitely going to be worn out with that many people around but I'm sure you will be happy to have them all with you.

@Mrs. B in 2015 - That's kind of what we decided! We said no more than 25 but we'll allow 35.

@Soon2BeMrs.McGary - I was in the same boat, our wedding was originally scheduled for 07/30/16 so there was plenty of time but as I started planning the people pleaser in me couldn't tell say no to all the people. I felt myself doing what everyone else wanted and not what we wanted. Definitely stand your ground with your FH and make sure to pay attention to what you both want not anyone else.

I have a couple that I'm working with right now; their wedding is late spring. They have 22 guests at a gorgeous, organic farm to table restaurant built in a mansion. Every aspect is exactly as they want it; live music, their ideal photographer, me (lol...you knew that was coming, right?). I know it's going to be just amazing; they'll have time to really spend with their family and close friends who really matter to them, and while it's not a budget option, they have made no compromises ('do we have 200 guests or really amazing food?").

Not everyone has the guts or opportunity to make hard stylistic choices like that, but heck, everyone will live and the sun will rise the day after, and if you really do keep it small people will understand.

I think we all fall into the trap (myself included) of thinking that our life events are of vital importance to everyone around us, and they deserve to have the most money, time and emotion thrown at them as we can muster. It's simply not the case.

I think it's cause I'm too kind hearted.

I gave up on locations for certain people and then afterwards my bridesmaids don't like the dress ideas I have in mind for them, they don't like the color. At this point my FH is like they don't have to come. So when he brought up the idea of Vegas I started to get on board.

@Celia - So extremely well written. You are on point with every single bit.

That's wise of you FutureMrsBH. Congrats to you and FW on your decision! I've been holding on to dear life to not let our wedding become everyone else's. It's been tough but posts like this help

@Celia, that trap you mentioned is real. I love how you put it!